Did I make the right choice ?

[beautychiQ]

Me and this guy have been dating for 5 months . When I first met him I was in a relationship so of course we could'nt be together . However , we became really close . I broke up with my ex boyfriend and me and him began to spend more time with eachother . He has traits that I would want my husband to have except his has children . I was in the beginning turned completely off and I still struggled with it . Everything then became cool with us and I really begin to like him and start catching feelings for him . He was my friend before my boyfriend and I loved that about him . I want to say about a month ago I noticed a text in his phone from an ex girlfriend saying that she missed him and etc . I got upset and he explained to me that it was nothing going on between them . Then a few weeks after I seen that the same girl texted him again so I read the text message and all the rest of the text messages he wrote to her and it wrote to her that he loved her and when I asked him about it . He said it was nothing but a game between her and him and he tells her what she wants to hear . Blah Blah ! I cursed him out and broke up with him . So about a week later he wrote me saying how I messed up and I took him back . So recently he tells me that his son mother is pregnant again with his baby which will make this baby #3 . I instantly get upset because I feel like damn just one thing after another . He says to me this was before me and they made an agreement to have this baby because she didn't want to have two differnt fathers for her child . Then also explains to me that he just found out which I find out to bs . However , She just had the baby yesterday but she told him she was due next month . So today when I seen him I was very uncomfortable , I wanted to see him but in the same breath I didn't . So I just told him that we should just be friends because I don't think that I'm mature enough to handle your life . He got upset . I told him I felt like I've been cheated on even though he said it happen before me . I'm missing him terribly and now my sadness is turning into anger .I wrote him a long anger message . I feel like I made the right choice but then I don't . Where am I going wrong ? Did I make the right choice ? How can I handle my anger better ?

[teko]

Oh you definately made the right choice. He is playing u. If you go back with this dude your whole life will be like this. It is not worth it. While it is normal to be angry, sad, hopeless and all that, you must realize that what you are feeling is totally normal and this happens whenever you feel a loss in your life. Dont make the mistake of thinking that because you are experiencing these emotions that you made the wrong move. Thank your lucky stars that it was 5 months instead of 5 years into a relationship before you found out the truth. Dont sit around and feel sorry for yourself, get out with others, meet new people and stay social to keep you from caving.

[imanaddict]

Yes, you did the right thing 1000000 %!! If you take him back (again) you will find yourself in the same position over and over. That guy apparently cannot be trusted. Besides, you are uncomfortable with the role of "stepmom" so it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway. You are saving yourself a LOT of headache by ending the relationship now. The pain of ending a relationship will heal and you will move on as long as you don't allow yourself to be drawn into his web of lies any longer. It's only human nature to feel hurt and angry now, but eventually that will all go away and you are now free to move on. Good luck!!

[AnnieBrooke]

You did the right thing.  This guy is not husband material for you.

[specialmom]

I agree.  I think you would be setting yourself up for heart break in the end with this guy.  The texts alone would have been enough for me to be honest.  You are in the dating phase in which you find out what you need to know about someone to see if you should move to the next level of relationships.  Well, you know that he plays games with ex's and says things like "I LOVE YOU" while with you.  That would be an unacceptable game to me and really, a lame excuse that it was a game at all.  Do you really deep down believe that?  He is keeping another woman hanging or he honestly has those feelings-------- neither is desirable in a mate.  Then comes this hodge podge story of a baby on the way.  I just wouldn't go there.  I think this has disaster written all over it.  Lots of drama and a bad ending.  Get out while it is just painful rather than absoltely horrible.  

I didn't date men with children.  Rule of mine and I stuck to it.  I'd be a fantastic step mother (if I do say so myself-------- smile) but . . . I know it can be quite complicated and I'm a non complicated kind of gal.  So I made that rule and found more than enough men to date that fit the criteria.  

So stick to your guns and realize you probably dodged a bullet here. I dfo know it hurts though.  good luck

[TTinKKerBBell]

YES!!  You made the right choice!!  There are TOO many Red Flags here.  

You are in pain now but please know You did the right thing, and time really does heal.

It's okay to mourn the loss of the man You "thought" he was - but it's also okay to be angry at the man You now understand he really is.