I think there's a lot of women who experience the same thing you do. For me it's all about the clit. And the g spot. Every woman has a different angle and size. Some of us like me for example, I'm narrow and long. So the best fit for me is a very skinny long penis.
I don't know if you had much range of size in your 5 examples.
Most of arousal comes from the brain not from stimulation. Have you tryed reading erotic story's ? There's a web site called Literotica.
Lubricants can also make a world of difference. Not K Y. It just gets sticky. Get a high quality lube. Water based.
After you determine your shape inside you could buy the right size toy. Read a story till you're very ready. Then experiment with the toy to see if you can find angles or speed or easy or rough. See for yourself what you need. Learn about your own body. This will serve you for a lifetime.
Then later down the road if you want sex you'll know what you need. You'll be able to guide your lover to do it the way you need it to be done. Maxy
I'm wondering if there has been enough foreplay in your past situations? Ideally, intercourse doesn't take place until there has been a proper amount of foreplay to get things primed and ready. If you aren't ready, then intercourse doesn't happen. Also, experts tell us that a man's organ only has to be two inches into the woman's vagina to provide stimulus along with the clitoris, and that the woman's vagina will size itself to accommodate the male organ, no matter what size.