stealing food

[fineAG]

I have a 7 year old daughter and a 5 year old son. They are generally well behaved, good in school etc. The problem we are having is they constantly steal food- goodies, I mean, not like making a sandwich in the middle of the night. They eat well and often and we have regularly scheduled meals and snacks throughout the day. I am passionate about nutrition and we eat very healthily (is that a word, sorry), but they do get cookies, gum, and other marginal food- I'm not a food Nazi, as long as they eat their meals I'm fine with the occasional not so great snacks... we have removed as much as possible to minimize temptation, but there are still snacks in the pantry meant to go in their lunches, or for example candy we bought to give out for Halloween this week- at their ages, there is just no place they cannot access short of locking cupboards which I am against on principal- we are family!! Am I kidding myself that they should be able to break out of this habit? It's very upsetting to me and I definitely overreact when I find the evidence, I am just so continually shocked that they keep stealing even knowing that it sends mommy over the edge, let alone that I really believe they do understand that it's wrong. They don't steal anything else from anyone else. I feel sure that this is pretty common behaviour in this age range but don't know how to react properly or guide them toward abandoning it. Any help would be ever so appreciated!!!!

[Cindy84]

When are they stealing the food?  Are they asking you for snacks before they steal it?  My 9 year old loves snacks and goodies.  But, if I say no she cant have it for whatever reason  That's it.  And she is usually fine about it.  
One thing is for sure kids love to eat junk and that is normal  however sneaking food or stealing food is not ok.

[RockRose]

fineAG,  mommy shouldn't be sent "over the edge" by something she acknowledges is common behavior.

Sometimes, you just have to put your feet on the ground and not be sent over the edge by kids taking candy.  

[mamacat781211]

Hi I to have the same problem you are having except my daughter is 4 years old and is stealing the food and hiding the evidence in the trash canns in the kitchen and in her room. I would say this is normal behavior but I don't think so because after I find out about it she brag's to me on how she did it. Now I know that she knows what she is doing is wrong because she is hiding it or trying and I probably wouldn't even had noticed the problem except I caught her one morning. I know she eats well because the child eats more than I do at meals sometimes 2 and 3 helpings so it's not because she is hungry. I have talked to her about it and even put her on a stool for punishment but nothing worked she is still doing it . I think she is just doing it to see how far she can push me and agrivate me. Let me know if you have found a solution.

[sssbarks3]

I have issues with my now 3year old daughter stealing food..She has been doing this since she was 2 years old. She has a feeding tube and its very dangerous for her to just go eating things when she doesnt know how to properly chew food like us due to her having brain damage. She climbs on counter tops, uses toys and buckets to get to cabinets. It's getting so bad that shes tearing up trash bags to dig and get what she can find. We catch her in the act at times and sometimes we dont. When we dont catch her after she gets done stealing food she takes herself back to bed, closes her door and acts like it never happend. FYI she does all of this while we are all asleep..Please help this is an everyday thing and has been going on for well over a year now

[lroberts67]

I feel for you! When I read your plea for help, I thought that I had written it, except that I have a 6 yr old daughter and 4 yr old son, but it is only my daughter who steals food. I have tried various tactics with little success. I have come to the point of putting a bell on her bedroom door so I can hear if she leaves her room during the night and that has calmed the night-time stealing. I have also moved any candy/gum, etc. to a spot in my bedroom closet and school snacks are moved and hidden frequently. Punishment is not the answer to this dilema, after all it is somewhat of a normal childhood behavior. and although I did go off the 'deep end' once or twice, I've learned that this doesn't help the situation either. It isn't always the easist thing in the world to reason with a 6 yr old but I sat down with her and had a long talk about respect. I attempted to explain that stealing food is selfish on her part because she is not only eating her share but everyone else's share as well and that this is not respecting her family. I think I saw a glimmer of understanding but only time will tell. I do believe, or hope, that this faze will pass quickly, but I am also trying to show her appropriate behavior by not grabbing 'snacks' myself when they are around. I have also put a bowl of fruit and assorted 'healthy' snacks out that she and her brother can help themselves to whenever they are hungry between meals. I hope this helps in some way.. keep your chin up, you are not alone!

[madisynskye]

i have a 12 y/o son and he doesnt regardless of what is in the house. he gets s nack right before bed time, offered 2nd on supper etc.. this doesnt stop it. and it isnt just "junk" food that he takes. it is cereal,crackers,granola,string cheese.. and it isnt just 1 serving of these things. he will eat the whole box of cereal, or a whole package of string cheese. i cant lock everything up in my room at night, we have 3 other children and it isnt fair to them cause he takes and eats all the snacks before anyone even has a chance to get any...

[Sayter]

Wow, I completely understand I am going through this same thing and it's with 2 kids doing it.

[ParentWithoutManual]

I have a 14 yr old and a 10 yr old and they continue to steal food from the kitchen.  We are on a strict grocery budget and when they steal food it affects the family and what we will eat for the month.  I have gone off the deep end too many times about it and i am fed up.  I refuse to stay in kitchen day and night like a security officer.  I offer plenty of other options after our proportioned meals like fruit and veggies, cause i figure if you are that hungry then you should eat the fruit and veggies.  i am at my end of my rope when it comes to this matter and don't know what to do. Yesterday, I found all of the snacks were gone and the leftovers from dinner, that was meant for the following night, were gone!! I was fuming!!  So today, they didn't get cereal for breakfast and as far as lunch and dinner, it will be nothing but fruit and veggies.  They see how hungry they are....if they are so hungry for snacks, let's see how much fruit and veggies they eat today.  That is all that they will have to eat, so i guess they will either be stubborn and go without for today or they be the healthiest kids in the neighborhood for the day.  I am hoping that this will teach them a lesson.  Also, I will give them their allowance this week, then request, immediately, deductions for groceries.  I bet that this will change their minds as well!!! I hope!!

[Sayter]

I tell you what.. lol I am on that same brink myself! I have already  locked my cabinets down and we as a family are on a strict food budget as well for the month, and it's to the point that we always have to shop throughout the month after spending the monthly food budget, we sit at home because we can't afford to spend money elsewhere because we are spending it on food.  I tell mine when they whine about doing something fun, well  there's the yard and there's your bike go play, cause until you stop eating like it's going to run out we can't afford to go nowhere. Lol they still haven't gotten the hint and we still chill at home and it's been 2 years now since it started

[specialmom]

Sayter, that's hard.  I am not sure if increasing your income is possible. But my kids as they got to the teenager years, starting around 12 became ferocious eaters.  I think it is actually normal to have to increase how much kids eat as they get older.  Figuring out how to make more money, second job, or whatever may be necessary to provide the need of food.  I don't know if you mean they are over weight but in general, as kids get older, they absolutely DO need more food.

[RockRose]

Parent,  are your children overweight?    If they are that's certainly something to put your foot down about.

If they are stealing dinner leftovers,  and they are average or underweight,  they aren't getting enough to eat.  They are at an age where they are craving a lot of calories for all their body changes - I can't believe how much my 15 year old can eat,  and he's small and underweight.    Fruits and vegetables don't cut it - he needs meat and starchy carbs.  If you can load up on the bread,  eggs,  peanut butter and jelly,  flour tortillas and blocks of cheese,  they can make enough food in between meals and won't have to steal to feel full.

Again,  if your children are overweight that's a whole nother matter.  If they aren't,  they can make scrambled egg sandwiches,  grilled cheese sandwiches,  quesadillas,  etc,  for very little money and get enough without having food withheld the next day as punishment.

[specialmom]

Rockrose----  what great advice.  Who wants their child to be hungry?  I count my blessings that unless it is unhealthy junk or as you say-- my kids are overweight, I will never turn them away from food.  I also want them to feel at home in the house and have some control over their lives.  Occasionally helping themselves to something to eat seems reasonable to me . . .

[ParentWithoutManual]

Thanks for the advice.  My children are not overweight.  You're right, I have noticed that when preparing meals I need more.  It is amazing how much they can eat now.  It's like it happened fast.  They can sometimes eat more than us.  Also, I have spoken to them about what time they eat lunch in school and what they are eating.  This played a major factor since one of my children have an early lunch.  thanks again

[mommapope]

I also have a 7yr old daughter she has been sneeking food for about a yr now hiding wrapers and peels around her room.  I have also got onto her about her taking food out of her sisters and our mouths.  I know she is not hungrey eaither cause we eat good meals. My new thing to try now is to let her spend her chore money on a box of snacks or food item that she wants so she feels like she has a choice of snack of course I will help her to pick a healthy choice as to she is becoming a little heavy.  Any advice I would love to hear it its nice to know that there are more moms with this problem.  Seems to be mostly girls to im wondering if its a self esteem issue or something???

[mmiller1020]

I completely understand and have the same problem with my boys. Food is expensive and when you are budgetting you have to be smart. I grew up in a household that the kitchen was closed after night time dishes were done. We would gets snacks, but I had three other syblings and constant snacking healthy or not was expensive. i know have three children and have had this issue with my middle son since age 3 and my youngest son has adopted the same behaviors. It is incredibly frusterating. Ihave had a alarm in the kitchen and a log chain on my fridgerator at one point. I have had advice from kids don't over eat to I must not feed them enough. I have been rediculed for punishing them for eating. My boys are not overweight but these types of snacking can lead to unhealthy habits and future problems beyond overweight issues. I think you are absolutely right in your punishment you are not taking food away but teaching them when you eat all this food it takes away from something. We are on a tight budget and irritates the heck out of me that  my kids have still not learned everything in moderation!!!
mmiller1020

[cheekygoat]

I have the same food stealing problem with my now 6 year old son he's been stealing Junk food ever since he could walk. No matter where I hide it, or how well I lock it up, he will still destroy anything in his way to get to it. Even my bedroom isn't off limits to his stealing. The roof cavity is the only place I haven't tried to hide the junk food, and that's only because I feel that is way to extreme of lengths to go to. I'm a single Mum on a low income, and I can't afford my son's "habit", and the worst part is he is teaching his 4 year old brother to do the same. Just last week I spent over $300 on groceries, two days later the whole lot was gone, because my 6 year old had eaten the lot! He eats 3 huge meals and several healthy snacks a day, half the time he says he's not hungry and can I leave the table, but then not even 5 minutes later he's creeping off into the kitchen as quiet as a mouse, raiding every cupboard and fridge grabs the sweetest thing he can find (usually jams, peanut butter, sugar (I mean actual sugar the stuff you add to coffee and bake with - No Joke) He will even eat rotten food out of the bin, I have spoken to Doctors and have been laughed at and was even told by 1 doctor that I had to be imagining it all, I wish my wallet agreed with that! I'm at the point where I am so frustrated because I can't stop them and as each day passes he's getting worse and worse and worse! I have to watch him 24 hours a day 7 days a week just to make sure he stops what he's doing, but even that is impracticle. If anyone has and ideas on how to stop children from stealing PLEASE HELP!!!!!!
Oh and I have asked my son why he does it and his reply was, and I quote "cause I felt like it" and if you ask why he felt like it he always replies "cause I did"

[acuteachermom]

Please don't take this the wrong way, but have you had him tested for parasites? Sometimes these behaviors indicate an infection.

[specialmom]

Serious question, why are you buying the junk food?  If I had an issue to that magnitude, I'd not buy the trigger food.  It just wouldn't be in my house.  Then I'd have an open door policy to eat what is there----  healthy things.  I understand the issues with trying to make your groceries last but snack food costs a lot more than non snack food.  Kids don't need chips, cookies and junk.  You can have air pop popcorn that you need to make for them--------  as a snack.  No point in stealing that unless he has a microwave in his room.  

Rethink your grocery list.  If he's stealing grapes and eating them, who cares.  Don't set up a situation in which he can't have them.  then he can sit at the table and pig out.  It's grapes.  

goodluck

[cheekygoat]

I agree with you totally about not buying the junk food. 90% of my groceries are lean meats, fish, chicken/turkey and fresh fruits and vegetables. I buy biscuits and chocolate for myself but they wont leave them alone. I have popcorn and muesli bars, as the school my son attends demands they are in there morning snack, even the kindergarten my youngest goes to has them listed on the allowed to eat list. I dont believe in cordials, soft drinks, they are only allowed to drink water or milk - never juice. I allow peanut butter, honey and homemade sugarless jam on wholewheat bread, but no butters or margarines. They are allowed to have as much fruit as they like, but they don't want it, they just crave sugar and the more I limit it, the more they want it, because other kids have it why cant I? is what they say to me. These past few weeks I have not bought anything for myself, thinking that would stop them, but it hasn't. My friends don't come around anymore cause I never have anything to offer them with their cuppas, and my kids behaviour is usually so bad, that they run out the door. I have been accused by so called friends that I'm too soft on my kids, but I have my Mum and other people telling me that I'm too tough on them and to let them do what they like they'll stop doing what they're doing. tried that. It made the situation worse, and now i'm back to being tough on them they're laughing at me and stealing more and more. They even ate frozen hot cross buns straight out of the freezer, i don't even buy them easter eggs or lollies - I never have. I insist they always eat fresh fruits and vegies and have tried time and time again to drill into their heads that junk foods are bad, but they don't care. I know my kids are sugar addicts, but I don't know how to cure them of this problem. I don't buy processed foods, unless I have to I prefer to make my own in everything that I can. I don't allow them to eat processed cheeses, or potato chips, or things containing artificial sweetners, flavours and colours, as they are usually all sugar based and if they aren't based on sugar they are full of salt. My kids aren't overweight, infact my younbgest is underweight, but that's only because he rarely eats a proper meal, and has decided he's a vegetarian who's addicted to sweets. I just looked in my cupboards and fridge to write out my shopping list for the week, and the only sweet/junk food that I have is a small container of white sugar, I have homemade muesli, some dried fruits, fresh fruits and vegetables all of which they can have what they like, but they wont touch them, that's not what they want they will starve themselves until they get their sugar hit, and its terrifying and frustrating, I just wish I could stop them. But thank you for the advise, you've given me more than any doctor has

[airwicca]

my two girls,11 and 9 are like your boys.unrelenting.and i am also a single parent on a budget.i found a solution that worked for us somewhat.first i locked the sugar bags,crackers,and other snacks that are for their school lunches in a cupboard and have hid the key somewhere they will never find.second,i established a "family movie night" on saturday nights.on saturday afternoons we go to the store and buy some candy.everyone chooses what kind they get and i make sure its enough to satisfy munching for a bit,but not so much that they will truly overdo it.this is the only time i buy any cookies,candy,chips/crisps etc etc.my kids have now come to look forward to saturdays and i think it has taken some pressure off and they no longer feel that i "never let them have sweets".plus,we get time together watching funny family movies on Netflix.It worked for us.

[Nikkis4]

I can't believe Im not alone and have FINALLY found other people going through the same thing, I have a 9 year old boy (we have 4 kids altogether)  who helps himself to any sweet thing he can find, including sugar straight from the sugar jar-ice cream from the freezer-biscuits, you name it he has just decided that if he wants it he eats it, we now have a lock on our pantry. Seems really strange but we are at a complete loss as to what else to do, hes even been through our room into our drawers and our closets to find lollies hidden in there we didnt think he would find as we were sure he wouldnt go into our room.....yeah...so wrong about that! We have tried nearly every thing you can imagine, taking things away, grounding him, bed early, no pocket money etc etc theres a massive list of the things weve tried, hes seen a councellor and Ive even taken him to see a doctor as I thought he was addicted to sugar..according to our doctor thats no possible..Id like to see him spend a week with my son and then tell me that! The only thing that is working for us is our pantry lock, it sounds extreme but its a hell of a lot better than going insane and so far its the only thing thats working. Anyways just wanted to thank you all for sharing your own stories because now I know that Im not the only one going through this to.

[Nikkis4]

Also wanted to add that this isnt because he is hungry either, hes not underweight nor is he over weight. he gets 3 meals a day with healthy snacks in between, this is purely a "sweet" issue hes even gone as far as picking chewing gum off the ground or a lollie out of the bin and eating it..really gross.. he doesnt go without, I dont deprive him of lollies or sweet things so I know its not because hes not getting these things. I did have someone suggest that hes addicted to the adreneline of sneaking these things behind our backs. We have 4 kids to feed and are on a tight budget if I let them all raid the pantry whenever they felt like it Id have no food left before it was time to do groceries again. Like I said ifits helthy and they are hungry the answer is always yes. My son has a serious issue one that I havent found an answer to yet but hope to in the future

[margypops]

I did not see where you found RockRose judgemental in any way and actually I agree with all she said ...Children who steal food are usually hungry and need more nourishment ...my opinion.

[Laraloo]

I have a yr. old grandson whom I have custody of. He is very under weight (barely 60 lbs.) He has plenty of food available, more than 3 meals and snacks. We keep ensue that he can have several times a day. But he will not stop stealing food and lying about it. What's even  worse is he throws the food and trash where-ever..., in drawers, closets, under furniture. It has been so bad that at the end of his bed against the wall, there were magots. Yes, magots for all the food and liquid he hides. When I brought this his attention, it was like he didn't have a clue, nor did he really care. He now sneaks in the bathroom to eat and puts the trash in my clothing drawer. When I ask why, his response is, "I don't know and I honestly believe he doesn't know.

[margypops]

I cant help wondering why a child is left with a bedroom full of trash, do you not clear it up with his help, how old is he, it says 1 year old but I am assuming you mean older.?

[Cmack22]

You should probably chill out you say you're not a food nazi but you're sent over the edge for "stealing" snacks those are the exct kind of fits that cause distance between children and really bad eating habits later in life not to mention it probably makes then feel inadequate in your eyes because you have such a big issue with them snacking more than you think they should ... My mother did this crap and I was 200 lbs by middle school and guess what my mother and I still have a strained relationship an another thing I was lucky enough for my parents to be divorced so I could get away from that negativity and I lost 60 lbs in one summer .... I hope u don't want that for you and your children's relationships

[margypops]

I agree with Cmack

[Medajo]

I have this same problem with my 5 year old son. So i totaly understand what she is saying. an my son DOES eat PLENTY food at meal time, an also gets snacks. So i don't agree wit the negative comments. You don't knoow how it is unless your dealing with it yourself. An also it is called stealing, because the snacks don't belong to just him alone. It's not fare to the rest of the children that he STEALS them all an leaves none for them. So the negativity is not called for. I so feel your pain....

[allmymarbles]

Why do you keep so much junk in the house? And why do you put junk in their lunches? As for "stealing," If you have only one box of cookies in the house, the kiddies will find it. That proves they are intelligent and normal.

Instead of manufactured sweet stuff, why not leave out bowls of nuts, seeds, naturally dried fruit, and fresh fruit. That's what I did. They seemed to eat all day and never got fat. What they wee eating was real food. However, they did find that box of cookies and one day I saw a wrapped up lump of something whitish in the refrigerator, couldn't figure out what it was, and threw it in the garbage. It turned out that they had been scraping the cream out of the inside of the cookies and were saving it up for a treat.

I love kids!