peoples opinions when answering a post

[Life360_Dave]

Ive only been here since july and received much support during my crisis from all that responded and thank you all for that. We all have much in common as that is why we were drawn here collectively. Some ways we are a team helping really terrified and panic driven Souls and im sure most can relate to this as it once was us. Weather is been on the abuse forum, relationship forum or other, ive seen and also experienced what appears to be some conflict between eachother and this conflict is being noticed by those posting for advise. Its all centered around what a persons reply is. Things like "i dont agree with XXX or XXX is wrong or have replied back to the replyer that they dont see things that way and it really is this way. It is my opinion that we should not comment on someones reply as these are all opinions from our individual lifes experience. Whats right for one maybe not be right for another. People posting questions are looking for answer and all answers have value as came from a person not a machine. I BELIEVE THERE IS A LITTLE OF US ALL IN EACH OF US. I think it would be more loving and show some union between us all if we just put our opinion and not compare or judge it to someones elses to give ours more credibility.

[Ben727]

The longer I'm on this site, the more I realize what a noob I am. At least three of the posters on this thread have been doing this for years! Still, I enjoy seeing people get better and want to help. But I realize that there's only a limited profile I understand well - so I try to limit my comments to people in that profile. And the further out I get from that profile, the less confident I get about making even general comments. So you'll never see me reply to a pregnant women, or methodone user, or sub user, because I know I don't know or understand those issues. I mention this because I haven't gotten yelled at yet! Not at all like real life :)

[Sonrissa]

Hi Jtizzler and welcome! I'm glad you found this forum! Why don't you start your own post in the Substance Abuse Forum and tell us your story! We would love to get to know you and give you some advice and support! Take care!

[jtizzler]

I've just found this sight today as I am in day 2 being clean from norcos and find it comforting to read and share experiences with out being face to face with people im struggling I am not guna lie but with the help and support of loved ones they make it manageable so thank you to all of you thats fighting the same battle and remember every day is a new day just think tomoro is already day 3 and im really looking forward to finding my self again. Good luck to all of you thank you.

[Life360_Dave]

will advise your comments tomorow as late here

[Life360_Dave]

thank you weaver your 2nd half was my point

[vicki595]

Conflict and differing opinions add much spice to the mixture. It's the nature of an open forum and an example of free speech.

At times it's necessary to disagree when incorrect info is being given, whether it hijacks a thread or not. The OP can always bring the discussion back around and in the mean time better information gets shared. It's also true that some debates are better held in private...personally, if someone wants to argue with me on the forum and heads that way, I'll battle it out in public. That's just how I am...

This forum is extremely therapeutic and I really haven't noticed too many threads going off the rails...but it happens...and it's all part of the human condition to disagree.  Many, many times I've had to walk away from the forum because things being said were so ridiculous I couldn't take it! LOL

Is there anything in particular that caused you to post this?  

[dominosarah]

We are lucky to have you here also~~

[weaver71]

I hope I never give bad advice and hope that I am corrected with direct honesty when I do. I don't think that these things should be taken personally, as all have the same primary purpose: staying sober and helping other achieve sobriety. Even if a comment hurts my feelings, that is better than false or incomplete information.

On the other had, I am new here, and was a bit irritated when a post was high jacked by members arguing back and forth. An honest correction felt appropriate, while a full on debate might have been better handled in private messages. I have no doubt that everyone has the highest intentions. I feel honored to be a member of this forum.

[IBKleen]

To be honest Life, I agree with what you are stating. that being said, and in your particular case, just today you commented to a new poster that she had to taper off of the "Benz". I assume you meant Benzos. However, she is taking Vicodin. Big difference. So who is it that you think is confusing the original poster? I believe it was just yesterday that you were commenting to a poster who was using Heroin. When you first came on here you stated that you had never used street drugs so how is it that you know what it is like to use Heroin and to withdraw from it? What would you do if the poster asked you a direct question? It is irresponsible to give advise on something you know nothing about and when your ill advise needs to be corrected, it will be. Again today you told a poster that there is a cure for the disease of addiction. THERE IS NO CURE FOR THIS DISEASE. It can be arrested and recovery is possible but there is no cure. Again it is irresponsible to give members false hope.

Often times members come here as a very last resort and for me it is important that they receive the best and most accurate information they can receive. When I see someone asking about a drug I am not familiar with I go to one of the members I know can help and ask them to step in but I will not give out advise on something I have not experienced myself.

Sorry you feel as though you are being singled out. It is not the case. I have been corrected many a time and deservedly so. The members who are here daily and help out with the forum are those who are committed to their own recovery and committed to helping others. this is a strong community and a caring community. We simply want what is best for everyone.

[Life360_Dave]

Thanks for reading this and hope more comment. I think the most negative thing about this is that it tends to get of the original posters query side lined  and ends up with others arguing back and forth about their opinions and im sure the original posters ends up more confused and perhaps feels has come to the wrong place for answers. I will make more of an effort not to do this even if someone provokes it. Its like the story about catching a fish this big and eventually the story ends with a whale devouring New York.
dave

[Sonrissa]

Hi Life, I understand your post and what you are saying.  I have found in my 4 plus months or so that I have been here and posting and replying, that disagreements and conflicts are inevitable! I have been through a few my self! What I always try to tell myself and others is that we are putting our personal and private lives on a public forum. We will not always get responses or replies that we will agree with. Just take what you can use and, what has value to you, and leave the rest! There are bound to be conflicts, it's just the nature of forums like this!  Again, I try to rise above it, but that doesn't always work out for me! I guess what I'm saying is that it is what it is! I don't believe it will change much! Take care!