I will say this, when I quit methadone, using 20 days of subs to detox, I sure wish I had been alone. I raised my kids the first 10 years on methadone, it was very difficult to focus on my own recovery and focus on being a good lover and parent. Not saying I didn't do it, but it sure made it hard to focus on me. I don't know what you should do, but I have decided to stop hiding. I tell everyone I am an addict and bipolar, so I don't have to lie or manipulate to explain myself anymore. I think one of the main reasons my marriage survived detox and my recovery, is I was honest about it, at first. Granted, I started taking more and more, and didn't tell my wife, but she figured I was taking more. She knows I need pain relief, but once the consequences of methadone became worse than the pain, she was going to leave me or I was going to quit. It was not easy to quit methadone nor have a family in detox, but I am glad that I told them I was taking drugs, so they could help me get off them. Hiding all the time gets exhausting. I figure, if anyone wants to dump me as a friend, lover, worker, for being an addict or bipolar, I don't need them in my life. So far, I have been way more stable, having shared my secret and not having to manipulate everyone. That is my story, not advice, you have to decide what will work for you. How much longer you planning to take subs?
"I sometimes feel sleepy , no energy , Just not social." That is exactly how methadone made me feel and it took a long time for those feelings to pass, but they did. Maybe a relationship to a person is not what needs to be the focus right now, maybe it's time to focus on leaving ALL drugs behind. Not sure, but you said you think you shouldn't be on them, so why not stop, or at least start tapering real slow. How much sub have you been taking? For how long?
I relate on a slightly different level.
I'm on psych meds. I tend to isolate & suffer low self worth.
My advice, go out meet people. Keep your struggles personal. Don't say a thing until a firm relationship of love trust and respect is achieved.
There's a saying. No matter how you feel- get up. Get washed. Get dressed and get out there. Friends, lovers. Can add immense joy to your life.
Don't hide your whole self. Just take it easy on the sharing regarding medication. Most people don't understand & it makes them feel uncomfortable. Let us know what you decide to do about your social life!