I feel tested every way I turn

[Kendradawn88]

Hi everyone, I've been around, not posting but mostly reading. I don't know if anyone remembers me from back in November but here I am. I'm now 25 weeks pregnant, I quit taking lortabs back in late October/November after I'd been taking them for years after a near fatal car wreck. I was taking about 4 lortab 10mg daily but when I found out I was pregnant I knew I had to quit right away. Well I did, and It was horrible but I was so proud of myself, but in January I started having kidney failure and was hospitalized for four days. The baby is putting a block on my urinary tract and in turn, my kidneys don't function properly and I'm getting repetitive kidney infections and extreme pain in both kidneys. The night before I went in the hospital I was in so much pain I couldn't breath, I didn't sleep that night and nothing I done relieved my pain. My husband finally said ok we are going to the ER now! Anyway they had to constantly give me fluids and I was severely dehydrated. Demerol was the only thing that let me rest and relieved my pain. After 4 days with fluids, antibiotics, and pain meds they sent me home with wouldn't you know It..more pain meds:( and told me I could possibly keep having the kidney problems until delivery. I was devastated after working so hard to get off the pills, but thankfully I had told my hubby about my problem and he was in control of the meds. He has been SO loving and supportive. I took them only as needed and when I went to quit AGAIN I felt the withdrawals start. I cried and cried because I didn't want to have to go through that again, and I'm pregnant so I knew the baby would feel withdrawals too. So I've been tapering with my hubby's help. I have gotten down to one 10 mg tab a day, half in the morning and half at night. I just keep asking myself why this happened after I tried so hard, then over the weekend after having a ton of pain in my left ribs (I just chalked It up to more pregnancy pains) I find out my ribs are separated! I see my OB tomorrow but he called me in another script. I haven't been taking them like I'm supposed to because I'm so sick of all this and I cannot understand why things keep happening to me to allow more pills in my life. My doctor says if I'm in pain It puts stress on the baby but why? Why is all this happening to me now? I don't know, I guess I just need some advice, some words of encouragement or maybe someone to explain why life throws us all this awful obstacles when we try so freaking hard. I'm pretty down and depressed about all this and don't know what to do:(

[apike31108]

I had lots of issues during my pregnancy. I took Percoset 5mg. I took about 4 a day. My daughter didn't come out with withdrawals. She was perfect. I guess I was lucky. But your OB knows what is going on and you need to listen to your doctor. It was my OB that put me on the Percoset.

[bettermomma]

Kendra, there is a lot for you to worry about... and I can relate to you, because I had two difficult pregnancies myself. Preterm labor with both and preclampsia with the first and clampsia with the second. Anyway, your doc does know best... you might wanna talk to him about a plan to taper your meds in your third trimester, that way it won't be as hard on your baby when you deliver. Stopping all pain meds now tho, may cause complications, and you don't want that to happen. It sounds like to me, that your pregnancy will only get harder and harder until you deliver... so I would suggest yoga or even massage therapy, if you and your doc think that it's a better alternative to the pain meds. Just a thot to consider. Good luck hun!




Momma

[Kendradawn88]

Hi everyone, I hope your all doing great. I just wanted to update and kinda needed to vent. I'm so frustrated that I'm in this predicament. I'm in so much pain, Im just ready to scream. My ribs are completely separated on the left side. Every movement I make hurts, plus I'm 26 weeks pregnant. I'm prescribed hydrocodone and I hate having to take it. I do what I can not too, hot baths with Epsom Salt, heating pad, patches..I try it all in between without having to take the pain meds. This is just so hard because I'm pregnant and this pregnancy has caused most of these problems. If I don't take the meds, I start hurting really bad and the doctor says that's bad for the baby. When will all this end? I feel so sad inside that all this is happened. I just don't know what to do. I'm doing what the doctor tells me because I know that's best for me and baby, but I wish I didn't have to take anything and I wish I wasn't in any pain. I have an appointment on the 23rd and I'm going to talk to my doctor about not taking anything the rest of the pregnancy. Hopefully he will get a plan together with me because I don't want this. I don't want my child born with pain meds in his system for any reason. I'm just so stressed out about all of this, I feel like crying all the time:(

[littlebit667]

You are on a journey and you are taking with you the knowledge you do NOT want to be addicted.  Taking the pills for real pain and stress are what they are for.  As addicts, we take them and turn them into our personal hell.  You are aware of the dangers and with your husband will take the steps you need to take to walk away from them when you can.  Please allow yourself time to heal.  You have the knowledge that many never find.  

[sharlola35]

Kendra, we are all here for one another, pulling for each other!  Take it one day at a time and try not to be so hard on yourself..you are doing a great job for you and your baby!

[Kendradawn88]

better***

[Kendradawn88]

Sharlola35 and MikeInFrance, thank you both for your kind words and support. I absolutely love this place. I have talked to my doctor and he knows I'm not a fan of taking the pain meds but he has explained that when I'm in this amount of pain, It puts alot of stress on the baby and for all of the reasons you mentioned Sharlola, and he said for now the benefits outweigh the risk so I'm doing what I have to do, even though I don't like It. I do feel torn and totally discouraged. I feel like I came 5 steps forward, then 20 steps back:( and now that I found out my ribs are separated, I know I'll be having to take pain meds, I just wont know what else will have to take place until I see my doctor tomorrow. All he could do last night was call in a script and told me to wrap them up in an ace bandage. I'm just scared but will definitely talk with him about getting a plan in place because I do not want my baby born addicted. I know I have to take them for medical reasons but I hate this! Mike, I am very blessed to have such a wonderful husband. He does so much for me I'm so thankful. Back when I quit in November I didn't tell him and I wish so much that I had because he's been my rock about all of this, and when I told him I was scared he would be mad but he was the complete opposite and 100% supportive. Now I just feel defeated but I know somehow I'll get through this, I just don't understand why it's happening to me. Thanks again to both of you, you really made me feel a little betfeel:)

[MikeInFrance]

There is no easy answer to your question Kendra... If you look at life as a highway then we have alot of open uneventful road mixed in with the winding curves.... You are really going through alot more of the Ups and Downs  than u ever deserve to be and I dont know how much or even if you are religious but hopefully u do believe in some higher power and just understand that you won't have more on your plate than u can handle! Although it may feel like it at times you must stay focussed and search and search for alternate ways in dealing with these issues. Seems your husband is very supportive and that's such a gift! Explain everything about your history with addiction to pain pills to your doc if he doesn't already
know and have a plan  in place that deals with your pain and protects  your baby!  God Bless You and stay around here for a long as you need to!

[sharlola35]

Kendra, listen to your doctor.  Pain raises your blood pressure, heartrate..all which adversely affect the baby.  I know you are torn, but it sounds to me like you really need pain relief. Be sure your doctor knows whats going on..try other pain remedies...warm bath, breathing, music therapy.  Good luck honey!