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Benedryl (Wal dryl) Abuse
For months I noticed lots of the tiny pink Benedryl tablets in my girlfriends' purse. They didn't seem to be disappearing so I never questioned it. One night, on a whim, I counted 37 pills in her purse. The next evening I went to count again and there were only 8 left...which led me to believe she took over 20 of them in a 24 hour period.
(I should add, before we get too far into this, that my girlfriend is a recoverring acloholic and has an addictive personality and lies about things like sneaking cigarrettes (which is odd since I smoke and wouldn't judge))
I am aware that there are side effects related to abuse. One is rapid heartbeat (which she has complained about since I met her). Another is the fact that she sleeps 12 hours at a go and, aside from St. John's Wort, she takes no other sleep aids and, currently isn't even working. I attribute a small amount of this to depression but to be actually SLEEPING that long?....
She also strongly argues that she is not taking more than one or two a day...sometimes four if her "sinuses are acting up". Funny thing is, I've been living with the girl for over a year and she has never blown her nose in front of me, had any allergic reactions, or anything of the sort.
The scary thing is that, in hindsight, I recall her waking up in the middle of the night making no sense whatsoever and rambling on about things she doesn't remember the next day. The fact that she strongly denies taking more than perscribed (even though I KNOW otherwise), the elongated sleep patterns and inability to sleep when I'm "watching", and the fact that she generally hides the bottle in the back of the cabinet and, somewhat foolishly, seems to buy new bottles and use them to fill the OLD bottle....all lead me to believe that there is an addiction-type situation occurring.
Does anyone have any relevant advice or suggestions on how to approach the issue or if there are signs I should be looking for or if I need to seek advice elsewhere! Thanks in advance!!!
(I should add, before we get too far into this, that my girlfriend is a recoverring acloholic and has an addictive personality and lies about things like sneaking cigarrettes (which is odd since I smoke and wouldn't judge))
I am aware that there are side effects related to abuse. One is rapid heartbeat (which she has complained about since I met her). Another is the fact that she sleeps 12 hours at a go and, aside from St. John's Wort, she takes no other sleep aids and, currently isn't even working. I attribute a small amount of this to depression but to be actually SLEEPING that long?....
She also strongly argues that she is not taking more than one or two a day...sometimes four if her "sinuses are acting up". Funny thing is, I've been living with the girl for over a year and she has never blown her nose in front of me, had any allergic reactions, or anything of the sort.
The scary thing is that, in hindsight, I recall her waking up in the middle of the night making no sense whatsoever and rambling on about things she doesn't remember the next day. The fact that she strongly denies taking more than perscribed (even though I KNOW otherwise), the elongated sleep patterns and inability to sleep when I'm "watching", and the fact that she generally hides the bottle in the back of the cabinet and, somewhat foolishly, seems to buy new bottles and use them to fill the OLD bottle....all lead me to believe that there is an addiction-type situation occurring.
Does anyone have any relevant advice or suggestions on how to approach the issue or if there are signs I should be looking for or if I need to seek advice elsewhere! Thanks in advance!!!
Jaybay is spot on with everything she has said. The original poster came here for advice and support. I agree with that you need to educate yourself on addiction before even commenting. If the the girl was here to defend her self she wouldn't even be defending herself, she would be denying everything because that's what addicts do until they realize they have a problem. This post is more forhim than it is his girlfriend even though the problem mentioned is about her. Addiction affects the people around the addict as much, if not more than the addict themself. Most of the time an addict doesn't realize this until they get clean and look back on how they have been acting or the the things they have been doing. This forum is all about offering advice and opinions that are thought to be helpful. It's what makes this forum go round. You don't have to be a counselor to do that. If you are nitpicking this post you might as well reply with a negative comment to every post on here.
Jaybay's posts are always spot on and straight forward. She know exactly what she is talking about and is great advice for this situation. Reading her replies, including her replies to this post, would make anyone with a bit of common sense think she is a counselor even if she isn't. Someone could pay $80 a hour to a counselor and still not get advice as good as what Jaybay has typed.
An addict that is actively using will say lie after lie and deny the problem til the end until the person asking just drops the conversation. Anyone that knows anything about addiction knows this.
Jaybay's posts are always spot on and straight forward. She know exactly what she is talking about and is great advice for this situation. Reading her replies, including her replies to this post, would make anyone with a bit of common sense think she is a counselor even if she isn't. Someone could pay $80 a hour to a counselor and still not get advice as good as what Jaybay has typed.
An addict that is actively using will say lie after lie and deny the problem til the end until the person asking just drops the conversation. Anyone that knows anything about addiction knows this.
is this the life u want to lead?? constantly wondering what this girl is hiding, ive been there before, and i felt like a little troll going threw my ex's s**t. i am no longer that person nor would i ever want to have a relationship like that again. i know u came here for help, but in all honestly, you arent the one who needs the help, she is. you deserve better, maybe u should open ur eyes to your addiction which is her, and realize she is harming you and would probably go further without someone like that in ur life.
para mí es muy simple. Por qué la amas? I'm sure you do for a good reason. Escuchar; I am a recovering meth addict in therapy and NA for muchos muchos years. I was taking benadryl like alot for many things. When I read the side effects were scary espantoso I really stopped immediatamente. I did not know what I was doing was very bad but when I did realize it I was done. I am ignoring all these other posts because they seem very cruel to me. cuidar de tu amor
This is Wolf's wife - Jaybay. Ya'll, please remember that this thread is not about any one of us and who is right and who is wrong. It is about JAKE. He came here for opinions and advice and we all have done that. I received a PM late last night from Jake's girlfriend, so they are obviously talking about what they are reading here. That's a good thing! I hope they both come back and let us know how they're doing, and that they're both working through their issues together now, and hopefully with a group like NA or a private counselor.
From Wolf to Michelleln1978 - Con cuidado con su hablar.
From Wolf to Michelleln1978 - Con cuidado con su hablar.
Wow! Thank you all...for everything. Granted, it's inevidible to get off topic or stray from the issue in forum threads but I appreciate the responses. You're right..it's about me and it's about her. I love her and I want whats best and that's why I seeked advice.
On a wonderfully happy note, not knowing she had seen this thread, we had a wonderful discussion and she has taken the time to learn the harmful effects of the substance and she is working towards change and I am supporting that effort 100%
Thanks for the advice all! I apreciate it!
On a wonderfully happy note, not knowing she had seen this thread, we had a wonderful discussion and she has taken the time to learn the harmful effects of the substance and she is working towards change and I am supporting that effort 100%
Thanks for the advice all! I apreciate it!
I am happy for both of you , Jake...
Michelle... por favor, respeta que los miembros del forum no tienen por qué entender español y si intercalas palabras en español sin traducirlas en tus posts sólo los haces confusos para quien los ha de leer. Gracias :)
please, respect that the members of the forum don't have to speak Spanish and if you write your posts with spanish words or expressions in that language without translating them , it is really confusing for the person reading them . Thank you :)
Michelle... por favor, respeta que los miembros del forum no tienen por qué entender español y si intercalas palabras en español sin traducirlas en tus posts sólo los haces confusos para quien los ha de leer. Gracias :)
please, respect that the members of the forum don't have to speak Spanish and if you write your posts with spanish words or expressions in that language without translating them , it is really confusing for the person reading them . Thank you :)
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You are in the unfortunate and uncomfortable position of either -
1) playing DEA cop to gather evidence that will satisfy your suspicions, or
2) calmly asking her to be honest with you about the behavioral changes you've noticed.
Who knows? It may not even BE benadryl alone that is changing her behavior and sleep patterns. It may be a combination of that along with something else. You said in your first post that she is a habitual liar - even when confronted with direct evidence like the cigarettes - so you'll have to trust your own judgment. If her behavior is beyond what you can live with, it's time to go.
You're right - it's not your job to convince your girlfriend that she's an addict. It IS your job to tell her that her behavior has become a problem, and her actions have consequences to your relationship with her. It is also your job to determine what those consequences will be as far as your life with her is concerned and make them clear to her. How you say it probably won't matter. She's going to be angry; she's going to be defensive; she's going to deny; she's going to lie; and she probably won't change a thing, but you'll have it all out on the table with honesty.
In one way you are being an enabler. You are enabling your girlfriend's addiction problems to run your life. How much time do you spend wondering what you'll find when you get home from work? How much of your life do you want to spend having to count pills? How many sleepless nights do want to endure while you watch her to see if she's still breathing? Your relationship is already turning toxic because she won't work her recovery, and frankly it doesn't sound like she's recovered from squat at the moment.
Let's look at what you've written. Your girlfriend
1) Is an alcoholic/ addict
2) Has harmed herself and continues to harm herself with substance abuse
3) Is now harming YOUR life with continued substance abuse
4) Is a liar
5) Is unemployable in her chosen profession as a consequence of her addiction
6) Refuses to work a recovery program and wants to pretend everything is just fine.
What is left in this relationship for YOU?