CT OxyContin

[Emptiness]

I'm only 55 hours into this, and I'd really rather just be dead.  I'm cross addicted to everything.  I gave up and took ambien last night.  Woke up in a DRENCHED t shirt and sweat.  I can't stand the sight of myself or anyone.  I'm NOT going to touch oxy or morphine to get through this.  Please I pray I don't die.  My eyes are watering like a fountain, I'm coughing, wrenching, nausea and my face looks on fire.  And the smell!  It's like fumes from burning the meds.  How much longer?  I'm going to try and not take ambien tonight.  

[Emptiness]

It's been cathartic to share.  Don't bottle it up.  People do care.  

[Ladykonnie]

I admire your courage. I am new  to this forum and have not shared my story.  Just you typing your words of despair lets me know I am not alone. Something tells me you are going to be Just fine. Follow the great advise others have given you. Hugs.

[kleighn]

L tyrosine* it's been giving me some energy thankfully

[Real180]

I just wanted to congratulate you on pushing through and I also want to let you know that it DOES and WILL get better!! Hang in and keep posting...

[sunset13]

So while I was awake at 3 a.m. thinking of you, you were awake too! I'm going to add Freedom's suggestion of L-trosene (never heard of it before) to my shopping list. Right now, no energy to get in tub but NEED to! Have to ignore my feelings sometimes.

Can't wait for mirror to be friend instead of enemy. However, I did purposely get up after reading Freedom's post and look, and whaddauknow, my pupils are bigger than I've seen them be in almost 4 years! Laughter was infectious, that's a good thing! Thank you Freedom!

You sound better today FL friend! I'm praying for all of us too. That's one thing we can't OD on!

I hear ya on the cold sweats, purposely didn't make bed cuz of them, had to change soaked pjs during mid of night, laughed at myself this morn cuz top and bottom didn't match, oh well, just me here. Looks like tornado went thru bed, sign I'm tossing/turning and looks like I had fight with pillows, one ended up on floor opposite where I sleep.

Sun is trying to break thru gray sky, jealous of your 70's temps! Send any extra sunshine up north FL friend! HUGS ~sunset

[Emptiness]

Florida weather is back in the high 70 's this week.  Although it's been a dreary wet 2 months prior to this week.  The perfect storm.  Hope the weather breaks for you soon!