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Crack Hell!

I have just ended a year long relationship with a 15 year crack addict. He is the sweetest, smartest, most handsome man I have ever met. He is so gifted in so many ways. But he loves using more than anything in the world. I have spent 2 years of my salary on him, trying to get him clean. Two mental hospitals, four rehabs and six arrests later he is up to about a 3-4 hundred dollar a day habit. I know it has to come from within him and there is nothing else I can do. I would stay with him, if he would just stop the constant lying and cheating. Lies about everything and cheating with crack-whores and junkies.
What is it about Crack that would make someone want it more than your basic animal instincts of food, clothing & shelter. I have been tempted to try it just so I know the feeling. Any advice?
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From Diane

I too was like you i wanted to try it just to see what the hoopla was all about.  when i thought about I decided against it.  I have two funtionable sisters who uses crack, that means they hold jobs take care of their families but still do crack when the craving comes how often I do not know. My childrens father use to do it to. He it rock bottom went to jail and vowed to never do it again not even drink he has been off drugs & sober ever since, I also have a brother who went out there as a teen and never came back I am always angry with him because I lost my big brother he is 48 and still out there with no signs of coming back.  I thank GOD everyday that I have another brother who has always been there for me.  I have a husband of less than 1 year who is on it, and I know it is time for some help. I have not gotten to where a lot of people have but I am not trying to go there so help we will get, but you can not get that help if you are out there with him. I said all this to say do not try it in the end it will not be worth it.
Take care and get as much help as you can!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Dear Kate, I to have an addiction to crack cocaine. In desperation you stated maybe you shouid try it to se whats the big deal, Well!!! JAILS< INSTITUTIONS AND DEATH.not to mention the social, financial and moral degradation. Kate when I use this **** im perplexed, I wonder how a person with all my knowledge did it again.I insight i can offer is ,its usually after a few Drinks a few percocets and then at times im off to the races, hanging with Liars, CHEATS AND THIEVES. Kate I have my own money I dont steal, con etc. Well maybe myself. The final result is im broke with a massive depression, and the famous words I will never do crack again.Kate this dude has to change. people, places and things.By what you stated this seems an up hill climb.p.s. this guy knows what to do.So i wish you the best. johnnykelly
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Don't know if you are married to a crackhead or not. But if you are not married to a crackhead and even though you may have a lot tied up into the relationship including children and a home-RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. Cut your losses before you get sunk in deeper and deeper. Its a crackhead rollercoaster.That's what i told my crackhead husband of 14 years and i ain't riding it no more. The lies, accusations and the schizo stuff will have you sitting in a corner counting the specks on the ceiling. Who is has the mental illness him or you? Because its a mind affecting drung yours and his. You can't keep up even if you are the best drug detective in the world because once you gather all the info and evidence that he's on drugs-Whatcha gonna do with it? Put his butt in rehab-no joke. don't ask him if he's your spouse-just DO it. What's his is yours and vice versa and you are his voice , you are his thinker. And why should you try to sit down and rationalize with a mentally disturbed person who puts on a front like he's Einstein. Get a grip. Did he have a family meeting with you and tell you he was going to use or was using? Well, that answers the question about should i discuss it with him. HE CAN"T HEAR YOUR VOICE RIGHT NOW. Send him to rehab away from you because you are more than likely an enabler like the rest of us who just want it all to end and hate to see them do without. And listen, baby, YOU LIVE. Do you hear ME---YOU LIVE. don't
sign a do not rescusitate on yourself. HOPE against HOPE for better days for yourself because I know that crack affects the nonuser too. You become a passive user without the benefits of the high. we fall for mind games like" Go on and use. I'll be right here when you come down because i love you. "You need me. you just going through stress right now" or " He's got to want to quit"  NEWSFLASH--YOUR MAN'S ON CRACK-YOUR MAN'S ON CRACK-YOUR MAN'S ON CRACK
The ride aint' over until Crack lets him off and by that time he is of no use to you. Find you a good Christian based church, take your children(if applies) treat yourself good, pray to God often and baby, GET THE DEVIL OUT OF YOUR HOUSE!!!. IF you aren't married to him, talk to his familly about committign to rehab. Have a family reunion charity fund for troubled family members, do a yard sale, look for free or low cost government funded rehabs--Take action. If you can't afford it, seperate yourself from his world. He's been gone out of yours for awhile. You just kept the light on for him.

you can always email me if you like. We are no longer victims but victorious in Christ. That's the greatest life changing love of all.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
First I want to say I am sorry! Second as you know (400-500$) a day on crack is not cheap like someone else mentioned. I am a crack addict(well recovering I should say) I havent used in 3-4 months and hope I never do again! It has ruined my life, my marriage, my relationship with my children, I have sold for my drug,lied, stole and cheated. My crack came before my husband it even before my Kids. All you care about is MORE CRACK! It is a never ending cycle. Thankfully my Husband supported me and still does and has given me numerous chances. I have been to rehab 3 times and also outpatient counseling for my addiction, and I keep relapsing, it is a strong drug.Even though it has ruined my life to this day I cannot say I hate it because that would be a lie, I love how it makes me feel and to tell you the truth if there were no consequences I would be still using it. I hate to admit that but its true. Being a crack head I will tell you like it is, he probably will not stop, if he does it wont be for long before he gives in to it and says one more time like I did. I am not saying he cant stop but it takes alot of will and support on your end. And whatever you do do not trust anything he says for a long while. My hubby took away my checkbook, cash,credit cards, jewelery, hid my dvds alot of ****. Good luck to you and especially good luck to him .
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I just can't do this anymore.. How can you give someone your heart and love and they pick dope over you!!  All the bullsh*t talk they talk.. they do good a couple of days but get around another crackhead and everything is gone again... I just don't understand.. why is he ripping my heart out???
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am living with an addict and he has been doing pretty good.....he just slipped last night or early this morning. He snuck out while I was in bed I woke up to find him gone. He is saying its not about me and that he is sorry, well F*** that sorry only helps if you try to correct things. I don't know  what to do I love him so much and I have found myself now in a very terrible finacial rut because of it. I have a daughter and she is telling me why do you keep letting him hurt you, she is only 7. I don't know what to say to her. I just want him to be better but I don't know how much longer I can be understanding or whatever you call this mindf***
Helpful - 0

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