Really Afraid of the Process

[KatherineX]

Hi all.  I am facing a really difficult time and need some support and advice.  Anything is welcome.  I have decided to go cold turkey on taking Dilaudid (3x8mgs daily) and Fioricet (6 tabs daily).  I have been on the Dilauds for 6 months and the Fiors for 30 years.  Prior to the Dilauds, I was on Oxycodone  (3x30 mgs, I think) for 2 years supplemented with frequent Percocets and Oxycontins.  I am now completely out of meds due to a falling out with my doctor yesterday (unrelated to my drug use).  I don't want to go to another pain management specialist and instead want to get the hell off this merry-go-round.  I always run out of pills early and then resort to buying them on the street or paying cash for early refills.  I feel like such a mess.  On top of this, I drink a bottle of wine every day and smoke a pack of cigarettes.  I need help.  I'm a pretty hearty individual but I am very afraid of what I will be facing with respect to withdrawal.  What can I do to reduce the effects besides supplement with chocolate, juice, and vitamins?

[sashaleenicole]

I have been dependent on fiorocets for a year, same  dose as you but not opiates. I thank god that I am allergic to opiates or else I know I'd be on those too with how easily accessible they are. instead I also was on klonopins though I am 15 days clean from benzos! from experience I know you simply cannot mess with barbs or benzos, you can have a seizure. it happened to me in under a year of addiction. I was driving my car when it happened, completely clean! trying to go cold turkey on my own. I could have killed someone, the detox delirium made me too crazy to know reality. please, go to the ER. save your life. you can't do this with just will power. it is a disease of the mind but also the body and it could kill you sooner than you think.

[sashaleenicole]

I have been dependent on fiorocets for a year, same  dose as you but not opiates. I thank god that I am allergic to opiates or else I know I'd be on those too with how easily accessible they are. instead I also was on klonopins though I am 15 days clean from benzos! from experience I know you simply cannot mess with barbs or benzos, you can have a seizure. it happened to me in under a year of addiction. I was driving my car when it happened, completely clean! trying to go cold turkey on my own. I could have killed someone, the detox delirium made me too crazy to know reality. please, go to the ER. save your life. you can't do this with just will power. it is a disease of the mind but also the body and it could kill you sooner than you think.

[EvolverU]

Hey Katherine!
           Welcome & Congrats on your decision to get clean.Try not to be fearful. Fear and shame are the enemies in this battle and all others. Is it possible for you to talk to your prescriber to do a taper? That might allay your fears, better acclimate you to what to expect and start you on your way. Do you have a support system at home? If so, you could have the pills doled out to you. Your doctor/pharmacologist might also be able to give you some comfort meds like Clonodine (blood pressure med) to help ease the acute and post acute discomfort. Yes, there are many, many people here who are 'medical' addicts. I'd say that the majority are. They tend to be more motivated in general to get off than street users like me. Wishing you every success in your battle, YOU CAN DO THIS. Keep posting.

[VICourageous]

PS Meetings our Good...That is one out of a few that says my bu*t from using today..Hang Tight

[VICourageous]

Hi..I do not know anything aboutthe Fioricets but I do knew the Dilaudids..I had to PM Ricart about the Fioricets...You just keep checking post and they will be back...I will say this..I have used off & on, any and all since I was 14 (now 56) It was my surrounding and it was just to party..I always walked away with no w/ds..But when I started to do the opiates back in the 90s I got out of control and went up the latter to methedone and 2 other meds...So there for my addiction kick in..There is alot here to say what makes us become addicts..The way we use it and the way we go about finding it...When  it takes over our way of thinking..That is just the tip of addiction..So I hope this helped you a bit...Just want to give u some support..OK Keep checking back..We are here...
vickie

[ricart70]

Hey Katherine    Yes it is what I have heard and read but since you have been binging and going off of them for 3 weeks of the month,that is probably why you are ok with doing without. Who knows.  Best wishes and go to the emergency room or doctor if you start to feel you cant handle things.That's a lot of stuff    

[KatherineX]

Thank you for your comment.  It does seem like a lot to contend with - booze and pills at once.  How did you get through your WD?  Are you a believer in going to meetings?  There is a NA meeting 5 minutes away from where I live every Thursday night.  I'm not sure about meetings and this one in particular as I'm told that it's pretty much a place where a lot of people go to cop.  

[KatherineX]

Hi.  As I posted above to Ricart70, I didn't taper.  However, I am seeing my PCP on Friday and she will prescribe the Fioricets with codeine which should help me with my withdrawal from the Dilaudids.  At the very least, I'll be able to cope with the WD better with these.  We'll see.  
I am curious to know how many people had an underlying pain condition which led to the habituation/addiction.  Or, did it start as a recreational thing.  Just wondering as I am a newbie to this wonderful board.

[KatherineX]

Out of Fioricet and have been for awhile.  For whatever reason, I can stop the Fiors without too many side effects when I run out.  Usually, I go through 90 pills in a week which is a lot.  I've heard that a person can be at risk for seizures by stopping suddenly with no taper.  Is that what you've heard?

[YesLife4Me]

How much fiorcet are you taking daily.  ricart is right...you can't quit that one cold turkey.  It has a barbituate in it that in withdrawals gives you tremors, horrible rebound headaches, stomach pains and possible seizures.  You must taper down on this or get some phenobarbital from your Dr.  

[ricart70]

DO NOT quit fioricet cold turkey!!  it could very likely kill you.
It is great that you want to get clean though .There are lots of people here to help with that. Are you out of fioricet?  

[LostNoMore]

Hi katheriine. I was in a similar situation. Pills, booze, lots of both. I quit the booze first, then a month later quit the pills. You just have to make up your mind that getting clean and sober is the most important thing in your life at this moment. It has to be #1. If you're like me then you already know that
if you don't get clean, things will only get worse. The tail end of addiction
and alcoholism isn't pretty. Mine sure wasn't. It was painful, but if you stick it
out and get some help, you can do it. If I can, then so can you. stick by the forum and find some meetings near you. You don't have to do this alone.
Take care and God bless.