I got my pain meds refilled.......could not stand the pain.

[Cissy373]

I truly tried but can't deal with this pain I have so I refilled my hydro's and really trying to take them as needed only........so pray for me please.

I sure don't want to go through the WD's again.

Cissy

[daisy699]

I have to be honest you will keep going through the wd as long as you keep caving in to the pain of wd and running and getting you script filled!! we on here can "pray " for you again again & again but until you get honest w/ yourself and face your pain and demons your NEVER going to get off the rollersoaster your on!! It's in your hands now and it sounds to me like you should start praying for yourself to have the desire to run to those pills lifted...Good luck cissy

[Cissy373]

Thank you for your input but I have RSD and there is no cure at this time and the pain is unbearable most days. Research RSD on the net.........and I know I need to get off the pills but mercy I have a life to live and I can't do most anything with this pain.

Cissy

[daisy699]

Is there any way you can get on a non-narcotic?? Are you mentaly addicted or just physically dependant? I still believe that the power of prayer can be amazing!! I figure you are having an issue w/ them seeing your on an addiction website I only wish you the best b/c I no first hand what kind of hell it is to live in addiction and be in pain....

[Cissy373]

Non Narcotic??? Do you mean like Tylenol, if so I might as well just drink water as it does not even touch my pain. I can't take any thing like NSAIDS, due to bleeding from them.........so not sure what other options I have. I am on Neurontin, and that helps some but not enough.

Cissy

[daisy699]

i hope you didn't take me as offensive for me I know until someone made me really look at myself and exaactly why I took the pills ( I also have chronic back pain) and explained that I was hiding behind my pain as an excuse to keep gettin loaded is when I finally held myself accountable and took proper measures to stop... Now that I'm clean I still have pain but not nearly as severe as I made it out to be...I really wish you the best and hope you can find away of managing the pain with out being addicted to pills

[daisy699]

Just read you post and no not tylenol that would be a slap in your face I mean non addictive..lol

[GA Guy]

The fact is that for people with chronic pain, medications can are sometimes are warranted. However, it's not OK to abuse them. I will be honest, if you're able to control their use, you will be the first addict to do so. You need to find a doctor that understands your addiction and can help you manage the pain without abusing the meds. If not, you're in for the same ride over and over. I suspect you're looking for some type of help here..there was no reason to post otherwise. You would have just started back using without telling anyone. Can you see an addictionologist? They are doctors that specialize in helping people with addictive personalities.

[gizzy32]

There is also a pain management forum here, you might get some great advice from there too. Sorry your in pain:( How many were you taking a day?

[Cissy373]

Not sure what drugs your talking about that will help with the pain thats not addictive.

Cissy

[Cissy373]

I did not take anything you said as offensive as I know everyone on this forum only has my best interest at heart.

I truly don't like taking the pills, but again the pain is so bad at times I want to cry, and let the weather change as well and boy it's even worse then.

Cissy

[Cissy373]

I know without a doubt I am addicted to the pain meds as the amount that use to help my pain doesn't anymore.

I've been to different pain management docs and all they want to do is use me as a guinea pig and stick needles in my spine to try and block the pain, and each time they tell me the risks are I might not walk again. That's scarey..........cause after this last surgery I almost didn't walk.

Cissy

[Ghilly]

First, let me say that there are plenty of people who ARE addicted to opiates who try to justify that addiction by claiming that the meds are necessary to treat pain.  But not everyone who takes opiates falls into this category, some of us really DO have chronic intractable pain and need pain meds to have any kind of quality of life.  Just because you need a higher dosage to control your pain does not mean you are addicted.  As your condition worsens (and RSD does get worse), you will need a higher dosage, it's nothing to be ashamed of as long as you are being honest with yourself and everyone else about your levels of pain.  

I would look into getting into a pain management clinic, though, since using hydrocodone long-term to control chronic, intractable pain such as that associated with RSD will eventually be very bad for your liver because of the large amount of Tylenol in the pills.  You would be a lot better switching either to a time-released med like MS Contin (time-released morphine) or Oxycontin (time-released oxycodone) or, if you don't like the idea of the time-released meds, just have your doctor switch you to pure oxycodone.  That way you can titrate your doses better and not have to worry about overdosing on Tylenol.  

Just the fact that you go through withdrawals when you don't have your meds does NOT mean you are addicted, it means you have become dependent on them, which is something that happens to everyone who takes opiates.  It's unavoidable.  But if you are taking higher dosages to control pain and not because you need a higher dosage to attain a buzz, addiction is not your problem, it's more likely a case of being undermedicated for your condition.

Why not drop by the Pain Management Forum here at MedHelp?  There are lots of people over there who live with chronic intractable pain who would be happy to discuss this with you.  

Ghilly

[worried878]

a chronic pain patient who is also blessed with addiction.when i say blessed i mean it in a bad way/ can be overload..i am a chronic pain patient as well...with a neck fusion..3 discs totally deteriorated so it is bone on bone/but the prior fusion made my condition deteriorate so i will not do another...pain sux

basically it comes down to which problem causes u more pain?? the addictio0n or the condition..for me the emotional pain of addiction was worse..i can do physical pain but losing myself and everything i own to drug addiction was worse..we r all different and we ake our own decisions...no one understands chronic pain unless they have been there..just like no one understands addiction less they have been there///no one is qualified cos they have not walked in ur shoes and felt ur pain..so no one here can judge u

I am assuming u had a problem with addiction or u would not be on this forum...tolerence makes narcotics less to non-effective...in reality will 10 - 20 mgs of a narctoic make u pain free?  it doesnt for me..it can make u not care if u have pain but narcs do not actually relieve pain like ice/heat/stretching/ etc..i get steroid injections every couple of mths and along with chiropractic and anti-inflammatories//muscle relaxers on occasion..i survive..i can not say my pain was worse now than then...cos narcotics r meant for short term use due to the incredible tolerence we build to them and so very quickly

only u know the reasons u quit...can u list them?  there is also a [ain forum here that is not an addict forum..most of them are on narcs..i post there often..it may be a good place for u right now..if ur choice is to stay on narcs then they have lots of info to help u...we all have a choice..and no ones choice is wrong..good luck..and be safe

[worried878]

oh...and when and if u do decide to give the pills up for good..do not have any refills waiting..those pills will sing to u all night long..cos u know they r there///just waiting on u to cave and go get them

[dominosarah]

So if the amount you take doesnt help you anymore why are you taking them??  I know about RSD.......After my last child was born i developed this.  I was put in intensive care and they numbed me from the waist down for 48 hrs.  I knew the risks but i was willing to try anything.  I walked out of intensive care 72 hrs later........sara

[dominosarah]

Oh geez i forgot to say this too......I have never had another symptom relating to RSD since.

[NautyOne]

Cissy,

If you take your meds as prescribed.......and you bedder-cheddar cause you will end up floating in the toilet bowl of life on the things.

If you can control them, then by all means continue to take as prescribed, don't increase your dose and there is nothing wrong with that.

I wish you luck, and hope to not see you back here in the same boat, but you are always welcome and deserve to be respected whatever decision you make.  I admire your honesty......

~~hugs~~
nauty............

[LIZZIE LOU]

one thing to know (if you dont already)

at this point, you dont know the difference between the pain caused from the rsd and the pain from your addiction...your neurotransmitters are mucked.  with that being said...i am sure that you are in pain...and it is real.   while addicted to pain pills...your pain is actually magnified...it's your brain trying to convince you that you need more, more, more.  an example:  you are in pain and start opiates...your pain level is a 5.  the more pills you take...the more your brain craves.  so how does your brain convince you to take more...to feed it?  it magnifies your pain.  after continued use...your pain level is NOW at 8...need more pills...brain goes to work...taking more pills and your pain level is now at 10.  it it a vicious cycle.

most ppl here, that have significant clean time, will tell you that once they have some time under their belt...the pain level is GREATLY reduced and they are able to control it by other means.

[Cissy373]

Thanks to all of you for your input and caring and I am grateful I found this forum. I know I have a problem with the pills, and want off them, but at this point not strong enough to stop using them.

I hate the pills, truly I do, and so admire the one's of you that are not using anymore, I want so bad to be there..............but haven't found the will power, strength or whatever to stop them.

I wish I had the guts to stop the refills as that is truly my down fall knowing those refills are always there. I am so scared to stop them completely and winter is worse as the cold just makes the pain so much worse.

Not sure where this *PAIN FORUM* is that worried878 spoke of in her posts.

Cissy

[dominosarah]

Look at the top of the page and you will see Forums......Click on that and go to P and the pain management forum should be the first one on the list.  Click on that and it will take you right to it........

[NautyOne]

I have been and many of us have been exactly where you are.  You won't stop until you are ready.  I didn't know that you wanted off the pills and "hate them"  that is an addict in pain as I was, but until you get to the point of exhaustion.  Chasing, counting, timing your life around them......"enough is enough" and we well all be here for you when you are ready to stop the MADNeSS!!

I wish you well,

luv,
nauty............

[mtgoat911]

this is the first time i have heard about your condition but i did google it, what i found was that people do over come this syndrom, that it is kind of like fibro. , that leads me to believe that you can live without narcotics, i read several personal stories where people who have this do not take narcs, i also know from personal experience that you can have pain issues and make it through life without narcotics, i have hep c, fibromyalgia, "chronic" neck pain from running my car into a tree going 130mls per hour, then there is the knee injuries from roller derby both my knees have been split wide open, i also have lower back problems but i have no idea why that happens, my point is in the last five year i have only taken pain meds one time (darvocet) during chemo treatments, i stuck with my na meetings, allowed someone to hold my medication so i could not relaspe, i shared about it openly in meetings, i had a few people consider me toxic and in a relaspe but thats ok, it was only a couple of really new people who have never had to deal with chemo, i truly believe that if you stay clean long enough you will eventually have to take something for injury or illness, once or if this happens there is so much help out there if you just get honest, i have no doubt that you are in real pain, i think you would get alot out of going to an na meeting and reading some na liturature, if you want to i can send you the link, so many people in na started taking pills for chronic pain and need help with what to do in times of illness so its something we address everyday, i wish you well, if i have more time i will do more research on this condition

[NautyOne]

I wish someone can tell me what these alternatives are .....after narc's it was Neurontin or tramadol and then the doc's just look at you with that wonderful blank stare.  I am sorry but, the day the neurontin stops working for me is the biggest fear of my life....Pain causes depression which is not "true depression" so people get thrown on ant-depressants that don't work.  It's sad, and I can't even imagine with all those injuries that you can go without anything or please share what you are doing to control your pain Goat, cause you could make millions........I am not trying to be sarcastic, but I have to know your secret......I have numerous herniated disc's in my neck one 8cm with cord impingement and I couldn't function with it....its still pretty awful without narc's but my whole life has changed.  I use neck brace, tens, inversion table, inflatable cervical collar..its not practical to run to acupuncture three times a week or hypnosis, or massage, it's just not reality......tell me what I need to ask my doctor so I don't get the blank stare cause I am obviously doing something wrong.

I a soo frustrated.......can you tell?......

luv,
Nauty..........

[Cissy373]

Thank you I found the pain forum and will check it out.

Cissy