I understand what you are saying. But I do have multiple sclerosis which I have helped from a company to get my Avonex free of charge while I have no insurance. However, that does not help my pain, Ive taken Lyrica, Gaba, and other different medications for my pain. Didnt help AT ALL. I had medicaid, I was going to my Neuro and Pain Doctor for over 2 years, I was given prescriptions for oxy. 90 10s per month. The problem was I didnt have 180$ a month to continue going to my pain doctor a month when I lost my medicaid. I cant work, some days I have a hard time getting off the bed. Of course I do have good days.
Every time I had a flare up I would goto the ER because I dont have insurance. Then would give me a shot of dilaudid and send me home with 20 5mg pills, when they would run out, I would go back, but they can only do that for me for so long, eventually, doctor came in and said I needed to do something else because after that visit they couldnt prescribe me anymore narcotics, they have my records, they know I wasnt lieing about pain, now hear me out, this was WAY before my addiction was out of hand, at this time I only took pills as needed.
I got pills from a anonymous person I know, when I couldn't get them from the doctor, again, this is only taking pills as needed.
My fiance and I broke up, then began my spiral into taking more and more pills. Mainly because they just put my mind in a better place.
I have still been taking pills, sometimes roxy or oxyapap, whatever I could get, for free from people who love me, but see, these people who love me, can only do so much, they know I have a problem, as well as I know I have a problem. I want to stop abusing pills. What I was taking is way to much. Im aware of that!
My mind and heart are in a much better place now, im happy, im happy without pills, but I still hurt like a #[email protected]
!#$ ... everyday, nothing takes away the pain but oxy. That is my point, and I dont know what to do about when I have real pain. Unbearable pain, everyday.
I have been waiting pills since Monday, im perfect, no withdrawals. I haven't had the first nausea episode, or diarrhea. No sweats, no anything. Not even a runny or stuffy nose.
My concern now, lets say, in a month from now, and im in horrible pain from my MS, or have a kidney stone which I get often. Or anything, I can fall and break my leg. Would it be safe for me to take any opiate, if I can fully trust myself to not abuse them. I will have MS until I pass away, there is no way I will ever be able to live the rest of my life, and im 30 without having some sort of pain management. Even if I get a prescription, and have my loved ones keep them for me.
Maybe this cleared up what I meant. Thanks for everyones advice.