Just stopping a 160+mg a day oxy/perc habit - Day 1

[Back2Me]

At 6:00pm I will be done with day one. Something I have not been able to get through the past few attempts over the past 6 months or so. I keep getting bad w/d and then going back. This time I really don't want to go down that Rd. I just tell myself "oh I'll just taper it will be easier". But it seems like I never have "enough" to taper and it ends up costing me thousands per month and at the end I have made no progress. Anyway I am off work for the next 3 days. I don't think this is going to be enough though. From past experience I known am going to need like 7-10 days and man there is no way I can take off for that long. Today and tomorrow are going to be bad enough for me. My work is very reliant on me and thy could sneak someone into my spot if I am gone for too long. I dont know. I guess just one day at a time. I HATE what I have become. Work-home-sleep. That's all of my interest anymore. I have been reduced to a f'ing zombie. I have to do it this time. And stay off. I have quit like 3x before bit it didntl last past like 2 weeks. Just when I feel strong I relapse it's weird. It's like wen I don't need it I start it again. Anyway one thing and one day at a time. I have to get through today.

[struggling_college_student]

I also went cold turkey from snorting 300mg+ of oxy/day.  I know how youre feeling but trust me it gets much better!  Sleep was def the last thing to come back for me and it drove me nuts but it does return....slowly but surely!  I hope you are committed.......sounds like you are!  If I can do it anyone can.......51 days clean today and each day is better than the last.  Ill be praying for you.....God Bless

Jeff

[DayToTry]

Hey I just wanted to let you know a new chair ar work can really help.  I bought a new chair for myself at work.  And I bought a Sleep Number / Select Comfort bed both around the same time.  I had had my chair for so long at work I couldn't even remember (I've worked there 20 years).  My back still hurts but its better, so yeah, I'd try a new chair.

[Back2Me]

No sleep tonight :(

[gnarly_1]

HEY get a blanket and roll up on the couch with some soft music playing in the background
close your eyes and get lost in the music it may be the closest thing to sleep you get
tomorrow get ourt and pick up some camamille tea it helps with the sleep better then pills
you can pick it up at walmart its called sleepy time tea....you can also try melatoin if you use that 6 to 10mg and the room has to be absolutely dark for it to work tonight your just going to have to tuff it out we alll go threw it you'll make it hang in there.......Gnarly  

[Back2Me]

Well there is NO sleep tonight unfortunately. The Klon and green gave me a few half hours but nothing great. Now I am wide awake. All hot in the skin. Does anyone else get that?? Burning skin?  Anyway I thought I was doing beter. At least the sweating is dine for the most part. I'm
Not looking forward to tonight at all :(. I just now took 2 klonis let's see if that works. They are only .5's.

[gnarly_1]

HOW you holding up.....your threw day 2 now I hope you get some sleep you got a chance with the weed and clonipine...BTW the general concesus is weed only makes the withdrawals worst....im not dising on you I actually thought some green would have helped with sleep but I had some major clean time from it so I said screw it and just tuffed it out
but reading here 6 days a week most of the people that have used weed all spoke of a negative effect....I will assure you this....a buzz is a buzz is a buzz and as addicts we cant aford one inevitably it will lead back to your drug of choice its just a mater of time
and thats a fact you can take to the bank hang in there only a couple more days and you be threw the worst of it....make the changes you need to make hook up with some form of recovery care and this will be the last time you have to do this...your not unusual it take a few time for it to stick with some people....YOU CAN DO THIS.......Gnarly  

[Jimmy1975]

Hi Back Glad to see you want out of the trap ! Just a thought here since everyone has seemed to cover all bases . Have you ever thought about going to your doctor and coming clean and and with that getting medical supervision ? You have a really heavy habit my friend . I know withdrawals from that amount can be quite dangerous going cold turkey . Not trying to be negative I just think you should exercise caution .  Take care and we're with you !  Jimmy

[Ballgame]

How you doing?  Did you go ct from 160 a day?  Or ween down? Oxy is my DOC and I tried CT.  It was rough.
I couldn't move and every minute felt like an hour. No energy and my kids wanted to play.  Brutal

[Back2Me]

I went to the BB game and it was BRUTAL. I cannot believe I made it through.man what was I thinking!  Sitting on the wooden benches was torture! Oh my back!  Anyway I am in bed now. Took a klonopin and a little "green" and 4 Advils and now im back in bed. But I did it I stayed the whole time. Probably not ready for it though. All I kept thinking was. If I could just take a perc or 2 I would e able to make it through this game. My mind went right there. : /

[laurel453]

hey, i wanted to show my support to you, another fellow sagitarian addict..:) Do take those suplemments of magnesium+calcium and potasium, i really think they help with muscles aches and this relentless feeling . Good luck ! :)

[Back2Me]

Thanks again for the support really. I am even going to my sons basketball game in about 20 mins. Gotto make one last visit to el toilet and take some more imodium to make sure I can make it but I'm going to do it damn it!
Still feeling terrible but maybe a smidge better. This toilet thing will NOT let up though. More immodium I guess. All I can do. Oh and I just got rid of 110 10mg percocets today. I'm determined this time. I posted a website a while ago with listings of meeting in any area but think I lost it. Anyone have it?

[ImDONENoMore]

The only thing you need to think about is TODAY.  Not using TODAY.  Worry about tomorrow when it comes.  It's too early to start thinking about down the road.  I did that and it only stressed me out.  At some point you will be able to stop thinking this way.  But its way too early for you now to think that far ahead.

Slow and steady.

[GataBlanca242]

Hey the cleaning worked for me, like i said i was cleaning like a mad-woman as i had neglected my chores for sometime.  yes, you feel like sh*t but if you get some chores done in the house, you WILL mentally feel better.  don't underestimate that part.  also depending on how hard to work you will get yourself tired and get a better sleep tonight, guaranteed.
Hang in there!!!

[gnarly_1]

HI  the key her is to emerge yourself into aftercare it is the only way most of us stay clean
N/A is a free program and it has worked for me the statistic shows that less the 10% of the people will say clean 1yr without aftercare.....it shouldn't be considered optional
it the very way we think as addicts that has to change to live in recovery your doing good
coming out at 2 days hang in there keep posting for support we all want to see you succeed goood lyck and God bless......Gnarly  

[Back2Me]

Ok only 3 more hours and I am DONE with day 2. Good riddance!!!!!  Today I followed someones advice on here and got up and took that hot bath. It was pathetic let me tell you. Lots of shaking staring into the mirror/space turning the heat in the house up to 76 and the getting in with some epsom salts. Then my wife came home from work and I went to the bank with her. The messed up thing is now I cannot sit still!!!! I picked up the house some because I tried to lay down and I just could not. Is this a good sign or bad? I get very tired easy but it's hard so hard to sit still. But it ***** moving abound too. My body is achy and my head is racing like crazy. This ***** I really hope I can stay away 100% this time. But to be honest I might have to change jobs here soon because this jOb causes me back pain. Maybe they can get me a new chair who knows. Anyway again this *****. Last time I daughter therapy and it was terrible for me. The total wrong person. But I have to do something. I have no insurance maybe meetings I don't know. But when I feel good after detox then it hits me the cravings. I cannot keep doing this to myself and my body and the people around me.

[ImDONENoMore]

Good for you!!  Anger is the best motivator.  It took anger, at least for me, at all of those horrible drugs, to finally keep me off of them.  Good job!

[Back2Me]

I didn't sleep much at all but a little. It got really bad about 4am and I did not know how I was going to take it. It was really bad. Right now at 10:00 for a second it's not as bad. But you are right I am MAD. I AM PISSED OFF and sick of being in this room. A walk is out of the question it's like 20 outside and ....yeah.  Too cold right now. But I am going to take that shower or bath right now. I have to get out of this bed today and fight.

[gnarly_1]

HI.....I  write these hoping you dont read them till morning....but experence tells me a lot of people will be up all night and come on and post....I just wanted to take a minute to encourage you to push past the pain this is but a few days in the rest of your life
right now a hot bath is your best friend take them often it really helps with the creepy crawlys
and the chills and sweats it will relax you also.....if you cant get comfy try bringing a blanket to the couch put on some soft music close your eyes and just get lost in the music it may be the closest thing to sleep you get...and remember...''you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile'' this will pass in a few3 days hang in there I will check on you in the morning
good luck sleeping......Gnarly

[GataBlanca242]

yes, Back, take Klonopin if you can.  sleep cuts your detox time.  you are still detoxing but you are not awake for it.  it is the best thing you can do.  but listen to the others who say  eat, HOT baths w Epsom salts are great.  When i was WDing off of Suboxone, it was HELL HELL HELL HELL HELL, I know your pain!!  I got up and vacuumed my house with all the RAGe that i had inside.  walking it off is a good method too.
keep posting, you are amazing!!  you can do it...!!!!!

[Back2Me]

Thanks. I'm still going. Very ruff night. Probably won't sleep I am still very hot and get sweaty. I hope this part passes soon I hate this worse than anything. The body burning sweats. :(
Anyway I might take a klonopin to sleep.

[healthy_living]

Good luck! You fit my story to a T! Taper, try to quit withdrawal, relapse haha I will be going at it again too! I wish you luck! If you need someone to talk to message me I feel like I can really relate! You will be in my prayers

[Nicole1105]

Congrats on quitting! Just try to stay strong and take it minute by minute if you have to. We're all here for support so when you feel really low just post. We'll help you through it. (((Hugs)))

[m0e]

after 20 yrs. i have relapsed in the worst way and have been on oxy. for 7 years and started drinking wine/pot this summer.  I am sooooo sad and of course everythinhg is f-ed up; i saw a phd and recommended suboxone.  is this replacing my drug habit??  i'm going to a aa mtg. in 1 hr.     mp

[Back2Me]

My birthday is on Tuesday. Being clean on Tuesday is my big present to myself. This is going to be almost impossible though I am going through HELL right now. One minute at a time I guess. Thanks for the support.