I have been diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, & ADD. I also believe to have undiagnosed OCD. I also have panic attacks & night terrors.
My history of addiction has made it exceedingly difficult to find a solution for my issues.
The only drugs that have helped me so far have become addictions, & the other (non-addictive) drugs I have tried have either made my problems worse, or done nothing at all.
I am a 21 year old white Female
Drug history :
Benzos - (Xanax/Valium/Clonazepam) cured social anxiety, loved rapid onset (would kill an emerging panic attack immediately), initially were taken on an "as needed" basis -which quickly progressed to "preventative"& "recreational",eventually leading to complete dependance. took forever to quit, made my anxiety worse in the end.
Buspar - requested for anxiety bc I read that it was non habit forming/non-addictive -was a giant disappointment, didn't do **** for my anxiety-however it did give me the worst dry mouth of my life
Lexapro: for depression, couldn't get out of bed, body felt like a million pounds, slept all day, made me more depressed, increased thoughts of suicide, unable to orgasm/no sex drive,made me never want to try another SSRI ever again
Adderall IR: for ADD & to counteract the sleepiness/fogginess associated w benzos. finally able to focus for the first time in my life, grades went up significantly, increased confidence in myself & my ability to complete tasks. mood enhancer-cured depression temporarily. ABUSED TF OUT OF THIS DRUG-when my script ran out I went through terrible withdrawal & depression. hardest drug to quit
Vyvanse: for ADD, made me anxious,moody,agitated,bitchy
Street drugs that helped: Marijuana(anxiety, every day use) Ecstasy/MDMA(zero social anxiety,made friends,euphoria- quit this drug due to increased frequency of night terrors) Hydrocodone(anxiety, happiness -on occasion/rare)
Have been sober(except weed) for months now- terrible depression/anxiety, constant panic, no energy, avoid human interaction ,weight gain
PLEASE HELP