yea i was clean twice since i last talked with u once for about 9 days and than about 4/5 days i dony kno i thnk it may be more mentall than physicaal but both are def there as u kno and yea im still on em as we speak i keep sayn this is the last day or last handfull but it just like a briken record ya kno
Hi jt, at least your still trying, but as you know it's extremely difficult at first. I would like to see you get over that hump. How long did you make it clean? Do you think it's more the w/d's or the mental aspect keeping you from staying off them, probably both I guess. Are you still using right now? I won't give ya a hard time, lol. Are you still in contact with those offerting you pills? Sorry for the questions.
I used daily for over twenty years and I took longer then a month to feel well- Someone earlier mentioned PAWS- I remember I cried everyday for the first 2 or 3 years but I stuck it out. I got 9 years last month and I have felt things like love, hope, joy, forgiveness, peace, satisfied. I never felt these when I was using. I have accomplished goals I never even thought to dream while using.
If your life seems to get worse without alcohol or drugs in it you might have a problem-find a program and stick it out-it does get better. Even your worse day clean is is better then your best day using!
Your are so right about that fog. I'm only on day 4 and today I feel soooo good. The 1st 2 days were the worst, yesterday was better and today I took a walk on the wild side....I got dressed and took our 4 dogs for a walk in our woods. I walked out to take the trash out and I was like WOW, it felt so good outside. I just stood for awhile looking around at my own yard. All my fruit trees are blooming, spring is coming...I can't really remember much of Monday & Tuesday. I slept about 7 hrs last night...I'm only drinking green tea (UGH) and water. I have no appetite, but I am making myself eat fruit bars,garnola bars and special k cereal. I am taking B12 and multi vits starting yesterday. I AM SO HAPPY...I am still a little tired but much better....I think I make really break out and drive today. The weird thing is my ole buddy hydro got me high the first couple of months,but after that I just kept taking it to get me going. Is that weird? I tried taking 3&4 at a time just to try to get the buzz....didn't work. I tried to quit in Dec, wds stopped me real fast...But in Feb. I made a plan, with a stop date....and so here I am....I WILL make it....Whats so stupid is when I was young I did any thing I wanted to do and never got addicted to any thing...I never tried the real hard stuff...just speed, pot, **** like that and drank a LOT. I don't know what happened to me last summer, guess I just lost my damn mind...But I got it back now and thats how it will stay...Thanks Grizzly...
whats up been a while since i talked with ya and man i really wish i could feel that im doing the same as usual here likeu u said in the first week or so u grab for what u kno when ur stressted ot sad or mad whatever and i just cant seem to get past that first week or so. but after reading i want that uplift and fel like that without these lil pills and when i get to that point ill be sure to write my experiences im actually looking forward to writing when i realized the fog lifted but as of rite now im in a storm and i aint seeing so well. talk u later gizz
i agree 1 month then as reality came back my emotions were all over the place and yes it felt i was reborn also now im having good days mostly and not many bad days now each day that goes by a feel better and feel as though im winning and i really feel now that im confident i will never go back as iv never been this far before i realise i too hadnt been long enough clean before to realise its not just becoming physically clean that made me think i had overcome my addiction but i know now it takes longer than that i have also faced trials that at one time would have made me go back and take something just to get rid of the bad feelings that also was about after 3-4 weeks. i cried my eyes out but realised i didnt need drugs to cope with life which gave me confidence that i didnt think i had left so i now know that i dont need the drugs and can cope with things so i am very confident but will never let my guard down in my recovery