may hop off!!??

[OhioVicoguy]

As I received many responses yesterday about my "relapse....why!!??" post....I only had 2  5/500 vikes left, and 2 10 mg valiums....and have had no alcohol since monday evening. I was going to do 1 vike yesterday evening which I did, and a half of valium at bedtime....which I forgot to do! Didn't take it! My plan was then to break the remaining 1 vike in half, and do a half this evening...and a half tomorrow evening...along with just a half of valium tonight at bedtime...and no more valium at all after that.....I was thinking....since I didn't do the valium last night....maybe I'll see if I can just get through another night without it....and while I'm at it...maybe I'll just throw the remaining vike away, and totally hop off everything today! What do you think?

[OhioVicoguy]

Thank you! I really need blessings and prayers at this moment in my life! I appreciate all the replies and advice!

[FlyFisher100]

I think the best thing for you now is therapy.

I would appear that you can, at times, control your impulses but eventually something sets you off on a bender.

You need to find out what those/that trigger is and work on it.

Blessings and prayers to you.

ff

[OhioVicoguy]

If I can survive and live through all this detox stuff....GOD, I'm so tired of this merry-go-round...and watching my life crash and burn around me....losing things.....anyway...I just contacted the local drug/alcohol counseling center...am going to go back to them...and get back into AA meetings....I just want a life....want to smile, feel joy....feel contentment..some sort of normalcy.....sorry for rambling on every one.... :(

[GoingToMakeIt]

If you feel good about it, go for it! What aftercare have you chosen?

[Sunnyd210]

The depression and anxiety is really hard and lasts the longest imo. And I also think the mental part is the hardest but u can do it I like the post above that says kill the pill Im going to add that to what i tell myself everyday, someone also posted " 1 pill is too much and 1000 isnt enough" I tell myself that at least 10 times aday that helps me. Good luck!!!

[FlyFisher100]

I'm of the opinion that if you can keep from falling back, you WD should be minimal.  You are down to almost nothing and if you ask me, it's all mental for you at this point.

Depression - yes.  Probably because we all feel like we have failed miserably.  That would bring on some level of depression in anyone.

Read my daily motivational under the recent post from Iflyfish.   That sums up how I feel.

By the way.  I'm clean and have not WD symptoms.  No depression, nothing.... I'm on here to help those that are experiencing what I just when through.  

I hate those f'n pills.  That's the way you have to feel about them.

You got to ask yourself.  If a guy broke into your house at night with a gun in one hand and a bag of vics in the other.  Would you ask him for the pills or kill the mother f'r.  I choose kill.

Kill the pill.

[Korley]

Well I definitely felt depressed, I think that was what was worst for me, but just know that you will feel better. Feeling so bad will eventually make you grateful when you do start to feel good. Have you made it to a meeting yet?

[OhioVicoguy]

I am experiencing depression and anxiety though.....but maybe that is normal....my 5 day binge stopped on monday....as far as alcohol....i have been tapering down since then...maybe today should be the day.....a half a vike won't even make a dent....whats the use....but I wish I didn't feel depressed ansy and anxious!