Ok here it goes!

[DannyD1123]

I'm officially out of meds, tomorrow will be the first day of the rest of my life. I can't lie I am very scared, but I have a picture of my father who also battled with addiction and won holding my son and when things get tough I'll look at that picture. I'll also lean on this forum as well. I packed my gym bag and put it in the car so I could go in the morning after I study workout and sit in the steam room. I have a good amount of the Thomas recipe. My doctor gave me a low dose of Xanax but I will NOT lean on that if I don't have to. I have my vitamins and such and I'm literally crying while I write this I'm just scared. what if I am not the person I used to be? What if my brain never returns back to normal? Will I survive this? I have no choice I guess

[motye51]

Just remember this.....you WILL survive this, your brain WON"T stay like jello......all that your getting ready to feel is temporary!!!  I PROMISE!  Just remember, getting clean is the easy part (believe it or not) staying clean is the hard part.  You sound like you have a good plan of attack for the w/d part....what is your plan for afterwards?  Do you plan on doing any type of recovery program?

[DannyD1123]

So far so good. I have a lot of studying to do for school which is nice because it doesn't involve a lot of moving around and I can do it from bed. Keeping busy is my biggest plan for attacking the staying clean part. When I'm at work or school I don't think about pills at all. Gotta stay busy...read to my kids play a video game attend my NA and AA. Keep in touch with you good folk. I know I can do it. I mean I gave up snorting at the drop of a hat. The whole ritual of it still calls to me but I know to stay away so i know I can do it. Just gotta get through the yucky part

[motye51]

How are you doing today???

[gnarly_1]

Hi Danny....well I have been following your post's and what your feeling is normal....try not to let fear into the equation it is always worst in our minds then it turns out to be....as I said b/4 this is 1/3 physical and 2/3 mental...it is not to down play how rotten your going to feel over the next few days but more so to prepare you for what I call the ''mind screw''....as jifmoc has said your still stuck with with the addicted brain.....Na is a great idea  ive been clean for quit some time now so the monkey is off my back...but the circus is still doing fine and well in my head....N/A treats the addict...the meetings are only a hour long and it will give you some place to share where the people will understand....your support system needs to have recovering addicts in it....no mater how much a '''normie'' trys to help they just dont get it  you always get that deer in the headlight stare....N/A  has been the magic bullet for this addict....with time and working the steps you will loose the desire to use.....something I thought was impossible....so for the next few days your mantra needs to be....''you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile'' a positive attitude is critical it makes the difference between being uncomfortable or suffering....suffering is a choice...keep posting here for support and get to a meeting as soon as you can.....may God be with you
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gnarly<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

[DannyD1123]

Thank you! I'm working on finding some meetings with some members who are new or in the same age bracket as me. Today I feel ok. Started a new job. Head hurts a little but nothing major, some little aches I'm going to try and make it to the gym later. I look forward to some much needed support to get through this

[jifmoc]

Don't think of it as "the rest of our life." Too big. You're just terrified about giving up your medicine, that's all. You will adjust and feel good, very good. But that comes later. Right now, you just need to accept the yuck of detox (it's nature's payback) and move through it. One minute at a time. Like you mentioned before, get into an NA or AA meeting asap. I promise that's the ticket. Keep posting!!!

[DannyD1123]

I already attend AA which is always nice but sometimes the meetings seemed rushed especially since it's ran by older members I'm working on finding some meetings with people around my age or new members

[RosalinaComeOutTonight]

I am 8 days off.  Still having a lot of diarrhea. Was really lethargic for couple days but trust me you can do this. I&#39;m using nothing but Imodium. It&#39;s really not helping. Even 6 at a time. Stil explosive diarrhea.  You got this!! Take it one day at a time. They add up quickly!

[DannyD1123]

What were you taking if you don't mind me asking and how do you feel today?