you've got great posters on the other thread. The alternatives you took was a tangent. Bottom line is you lost control and something else has control.
Everyone in your life needs you back in control of you.
It's not the drug, it's how we react to them.
Addiction is addiction, crisis is crisis. Have you heard of a dry drunk? An alcoholic who stops drinking, but does nothing more for recovery, still acts and feels like an alcoholic. I could get addicted to anything. I don't gamble, but I bet I could get compulsive about the chase. See, thinking about it I asked if you wanted to bet. What we do is not as important as why we do it. Why do you think you use drugs? The answer to that question is the only reason I have any control over my actions. There are no new addictions, there are only new forms of escape. I hated opiates at 13, hallucinogens had a better bang for the buck. I never realized I was high on something all the time, chemicals changed, but I didn't. Hopefully the tools that got you sober before will continue to help you now. Do you think you are chemically dependent or an addict?
K