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Avatar universal

getting harder

I have 6 1/2 pills appx 2 mgs of methadone.  I'm scared about when its gone.  It's already really hard.  I've been taking klonopin and clonodine on weekend and laying around.  At work I've been doing whatever I can to seem normal, but by the end of the day my legs hurt so bad I can hardly stand.  I run home, get in a hot tub, then get in bed.  I honestly don't care what my family thinks.  I have 2 teenage boys still at home, 2 adult sons and a husband.  I've catered to them for 28 years.  I'm going to do whatever I need to do for myself right now.  I can see the doctor on the 22nd.  I hope I can make it that long.  11 days is a long time, especially when I'll be out of my little half pill in 5 days.  You know if I was  just getting meds for pain and it was normal, like taking blood pressure meds or something, I wouldn't even be doing this.  I just get so embarrassed and humiliated at the different situations that come up.  One doctor made me cry when I told him I was on methadone for pain when I was searching for a surgeon for knee replacement.  When I go to the pharmacy and the doctor has not faxed over the script, it's embarrassing to have to come back.  One time they had a note that I need to see the doctor before I get more meds.   The note was on the doctor's computer, so every time I went to get the meds the pharmacy told me I need to see the doctor.  I had seen the doctor, the nurse just hadn't taken the note off the computer.  People speak to you differently when you're on pain meds, they look at you differently.  I use to be very overweight, and it's even worse that the way people treat fat people.  I can't talk to the doctor either.  He's weird.  I don't know what to say.  I feel like I'm a junkie trying to get high.  One time when I asked for something, I don't remember what it was, he said, "You don't have cancer."  What does that mean?  I live in a small town.  I think I might need to go somewhere else.  It will be difficult because I work and doctors don't stay long after 4 pm.  Can I do this?  Is going from 2mgs a day to nothing going to put me under the table?  If I had a date or time when this would all be better, I could get through it easier.  I know you don't know the answer to that, but some ideas would be helpful.

Thanks
13 Responses
Avatar universal
wat r u tryin to do wean off of the methadone? or make it thru till ur apt? im a lil confused... not judgin in anyway just asking wat info ur lookin for? wat made u decide to quit if u are?
Avatar universal
I just want to welcome you. I understand exactly what you're saying regarding the Dr., the pharmacy. I had one pharmicist practically shouting at me..she was making sure that anyone in the vacinity could hear her. All I can say is I am very grateful I am opiate free for 22 days. It is a great relief. I also know the anxiety you are experiencing as the pills in the bottle get lower. I don't have the knowledge regarding methadone but thankfully other's here do. So be sure to check in..I am going to send a private message to someone who has more expertise.
Reading about what others here have done (methadone users) can be very helpful in the meantime..here on the forum. I wish you good health and freedom.
Avatar universal
I guess I don't understand how the posts thing works.  I have previous posts that explain that I'm trying to ween off methadone, but I guess I didn't post this underneath that.  I'm sorry.
I've been on methadone, 3 5mgs a day for probably 4 years.  I had both knees replaced last year so I'm trying to get off and I feel that I'm not getting the support I need from the doctor.  They gave me 15 and said take 1 for a week and then good luck basically.  I'm trying to teach school too.  To donewitis, if you could put me in touch with someone who's gone through this, especially in my situation, low doses for long time, I would appreciate it.  Also any advice in navigating the site would also be helpful.

Thanks so much!
Avatar universal
Hi!  I just wanted to encourage you to hang in there!  I know that it's so hard right now with all the fear we have over running out of pills, especially when it's a taper and at the end.  The thing with a taper.....when you get pretty low in MGs, it's best to just stop cause you're dragging it out.  You have klonopin and clonidine.  It's never going to be easier than now.  I'm sorry!  I know that's horrible news, but try to relax a little, as much as you can anyway!  It will be over before you know it.

I'd like to give you some hints I used.  Get some hylands leg cramps.  It works WONDERS!  Has quinine in it.  Awesome stuff.  Also, cal-mag-zinc supplement.  It's a three in one that you can get at wal mart.  If you take like 4 in the morning and 4 at night it will help you so much!  (I was told about that from a member who quit methadone after YEARS on it!)   Also, drink gatorade and apple juice alternating all day.  Epsom salt baths help too with aches and pains and RLS.  When you go to bed, try to lie on a heating pad if you are aching.  That helped me a lot too.

Good luck.  And hang in there, ok?
Avatar universal
I sent a message to a fella who knows alot about methadone. He usually comes here at night. Tramahater gave some good advice too. Bananas are good source of potassium..also help with muscle aches. Scroll down to the bottom of this page, on right see Health pages..then Thomas's Recipe and Amino Acid Protocol..there are supplements and more advice on getting through the w/d's. My heart goes out to you..starting a new school year and having to deal with this right now. It can be done..you can do this. Today I picked up some Yogi Mind Relaxing Tea..I've heard it really helps with the anxiety. I'm going to have a cup now.
I don't know if this will offend or not...but I'm praying for you.
Avatar universal
Thanks for responding so quickly.  I'm off to wal mart tomorrow!  I'm going to do this!  You guys are so sweet to care about and pray for a total stranger.  I'll be a new person by Christmas!  Will have lots to be thankful for by Thanksgiving!  Thanks Again.
Avatar universal
I hope gnarly will see this and respond.  In the meantime, read posts about methadone as he comments in most of them.  He is an expert on this and can really help you through this.  I'm not experienced in methadone but from what you've written it seems that, based on the length of time you've been on this, your taper may be a bit fast.  The usual advice seems to be to drop a bit and stay at that point until you feel stable, then drop again ... it's a slow process but easier on you physically.  There are others who have jumped off at a higher dose.  Seems you were on 15 mg. total daily, which is on the lower side than a lot of people.  But then you were on it for a considerable length of time.  In any event, your doctor should help you through this and not just throw a bunch of pills at you and say take one or two a day and then you're done.  All the suggestions you've been given are great.  I will add that I find Valerian Root to be terrific for any anxiety.  It's safe and all-natural.  Also, for sleep, Melatonin can help, though I prefer Alteril, which is also all-natural and includes Melatonin, l-tryptophan, Valerian Root, and Passion Flower and probably a few other things.  I prefer it to the Ambien I used to take.  Best of luck.
Avatar universal
How are you doin today? Gnarly..didn't get on-line last night..but there are others who can advise. Did you pick up the supplements from Wal-Mart?  Look forward to hearing from you!
1741355 tn?1311457956
Hello and welcome and yes you can do this...I have been clean 61 days was on 70mg of methadone for almost 3 years...I was so nervous and scared during my taper that in a way when I took my last dose I felt some relief It was rough but I knew there wasnt any more and it was time to just deal with whatever came, this will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but when its over also one of your biggest accomplishments... like the others suggested get the supplements on the thomas receipe, try to exercise and also drink the protein shakes, go ahead and start all of this now...it takes 60-90 days kick it but like you mentioned you'll be a healthy and clean new person by christmas...this would be the best gift you could ever give yourself and your family!!!  Gnarly should be on later he was a real blessing to me during my detox...As for sleep I tried everything OTC and it will just take some time...good luck!
Avatar universal
"One time when I asked for something, I don't remember what it was, he said, "You don't have cancer."  What does that mean? "

I'll bet you were asking about fentanyl, and a lot of Docs think it's only for cancer patients, not chronic pain control. That should tell you that the Doc isn't keeping up with the medical journals, and therefore not the brightest bulb in the pack, (but thinks he is) and probably not the best one to see for your troubles.

Ahh yes the "fat" thing. A lot of Docs think that if you loose weight, all your problems, knee pain, back pain, pads etc. will mysteriously heal themselves. Stay away from those ones too, although they are probably one and the same in your case. He probably gets his medical updates from watching Dr. oz and his holistic quackery on TV, and eating unfertilized and undernourished "organic" veggies  and eating Chinese herbs grown in toxic waste filled gardens will make all your troubles go away. There are a lot of ignorant Dr's out there who seem to have forgotten their oath. They only want to treat "healthy" people for scrapped knees and kitchen knife cuts their "healthy" people get from slicing up tough rooty organic carrots. It's not easy, but there are better docs out there that actually treat people properly and find the best way to treat your ailments and not make you go through what you are going through, which isn't the best quality of life nor the best quality of medical care.  

Anyways, use your last pills to taper if you have to, otherwise just stick to what you've learned here about getting through the bad wd's, and you will get through it.
If you are just trying to make it till Dr. day, you know you will be going through this all over again when the next prescript runs out early.

Avatar universal
Oh I should have read your other posts, LoL!

Still doesn't change anything, except  underline what a crappy doc you have. Generally, when they wean you off methadone, they do it 2mg at a time each week or two, until you get down to 10-12 mg, then even smaller steps.  For him to cut your 35mg dose in half  for a week and say "good luck" is ridiculous! Good to see you had your knee's done though.
Avatar universal
HI IM SO SORRY TO GET TO THIS LATE BUT i DO TAKE SUN NIGHT OFF...... you should be fine jumping off 2mg is very doable expect to not be yourself for a few days and the physical withdrawal can last a week getting off methadone is hore of a post methadone story then the actual detox.....the detox is simlar to most narcotics its the weekks/months after that make it so hard to kick the first thing you notice is you cant sleep it kinda like you cant shut your brain off then the energy crash set in this is probably the hardest part you have to force yourself to exorcize it is the only thing that will take that away even a walk around the block will help you have already been givin great advise on supplements walmart is the cheepest
the whey protein shakes come in 3 flavors the chocolate is good drick 2 a day you can pick up a 2lb can for 15 bucks it is full of the amino acids as wel as extra vitamins and the protein all of witch the brain needs to heel get on the 3 in one vitamin right now it takes a few days for it to work take 4 in the morning and 4 at dinner this is going to be ruff but me and the other members here prove it is doable keep posting for support good luck and God bless......Gnarly    
Avatar universal
Thank you for all your advice and for caring enough to read the posts and respond.  I am doing ok.  My biggest problem is that my legs  hurt pretty bad by around 1 pm. at school.  I have lymphedema in my legs that has gotten worse this last year, left one since the knee surgery.  The withdrawals haven't been unbearable, but I've had the 2mgs until today.  Since honesty seems to be the best policy when you are an addict, and I suppose I am to some degree.  I need to say that the pain doctor has also given me 6/ 10mg325 narcos  per day.  This is what I've been doing.  Because the narcos don't work for the pain anymore at that dose, I've been taking twice the dose, 4 pills every six hours until they run out.  The script is for a month, they last about 13 days.  When I run out, I've been taking a couple of extra methadone to help with the withdrawals for a couple of days.  Then when the methadone is running out, I half them and get the narcos again.  In my mind, I'm managing my pain.  The two pills of narco don't touch the pain.  So I've been off Narcos for about 3 wks now(because I ran out,not because doctor said,) And I asked the doctor to take me off the methadone for several reasons, one of them being that I started running out of both at the same time and I couldn't function.  So I'm suppose to get another 180 narcos tomorrow and this is where I become an addict.  I feel like I deserve to be pain free even if it's only for two weeks, and then I'll suffer for two weeks.  Now I won't have the methadone to take the edge off of the withdrawals from Narcos.  So I think I'm going to try to exercise self  control and take the Narcos as directed.   Or I may give them to my husband and tell him to only give them to me when I get home from work and really need them or when I get a migraine.  I have honestly been trying to do right.  I've had gastric bypass and I'm not supposed to take NSAIDs. at all, but I went and bought some children's advil and some nexium type stuff and I've been using that to help my leg pain.  The last thing I want or need right now is an ulcer in my stomach.  I'm sure you have some ideas, opinions about me taking the narcos now that I'm completely off of them anyway.  Probably should just try to go to other things completely.  I see the doctor on the 22nd.  Not sure what I will say to him.  I don't want him to know I'm abusing the Narco.  I'll never get another thing.  There is only one pain doctor in my town, but there are some south about 30 miles, so maybe I should change.  Thanks for any advice.
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