stopping

[cherie_hodges1974]

I have been using pills for about 6yrs now, I want more than ever to stop and get this terrible stuff out of my life forever, I am taking up to 200mg a day now that is a bad or big day, I can get by sometimes with as little as 20mgs,  I very rarely go more than 24hours without something, the longest I have gone is 2 days, I need help, I would like to know what to expect to go through as I know what hell it is to just go 2 days, I am on hydrocodone and I know that I am killing myself and my marriage of 19yrs, I have even been on life support once when I accidentally overdosed, any help is welcome,  thanks

[Gettingalifeagain]

I hated living a lie.  My family thought I was clean and sober after the LAST incident. Living the big lie kept me sick, kept me using to get rid of the guilt.  No communication or trust were deal breakers....
Now I am transparent, everyone knows where I am and what I am doing, not "I wonder where she is"....it is very freeing....keep up that liberation!

[cherie_hodges1974]

One of the many ways that it has been hard on my marriage is the lies, I will not lie to him anymore and that is helping but one of the things that  is also hard is when I was first using he did not Care and when I first felt like I was in trouble I asked him for help and he did not know what to do so he told me to just stop which of course did not work, I then asked him for help the 2 time and got the same result, I overdosed not long after that and was on life support for a week, that is when he started hating the pills and he blamed everyone but me, I was so addicted by then that stopping was impossible to me, that was four years ago, I have been hiding and lying ever sense, I am to the point now that I refuse to lie to him, I simply can not insure the look of hurt in his face anymore, I am pretty sure he is tired to, I am 40 yrs old and need to be done with all of this so that I can give him the wife and life that he deserves. Tell me about your marriage if you would and thank you for asking.

[Jinx_777]

are you prescribed the meds or get them elsewhere??
tell your contacts, including your dr you are stopping so you cut off those ways to get pills.
the physical detox 2-5 days is easy compared to staying clean.
you can google detox to get other ideas of what can help you, but you will have to do the work of staying clean.  
sometimes just being sick and tired of being sick and tired is enough

[hormonejunkie]

I'm curious why the Thomas recipe is allowed on here while my post was removed for recommending certain meds. Doesn't Thomas recommend a few Rx things and off-label OTC uses?

I would definitely say to taper. It helps. Check in here with updates to keep you strong and for help with specific symptoms.

If you don't mind me asking, how were the pills affecting your marriage? They have messed up mine too and just wondering how it manifested for someone else.

[jifmoc]

Hey, Cherie! You come to the right place. Have you read other posts? If not, please do, because they ALL have the same theme as yours: self-disgust, shame, fear. You are in good company (and lots of it.)

You may know about the Thomas recipe? It's on this forum. Tells you all the stuff you need to get for wds. Acute will last prob for you a week, given your amount and the length of time you've been using.

Are you you planning on doing c/t? Many of us have (I could never taper!) And when are you gonna start? You can post constantly and will get lots of help.

Good job in deciding to quit! It's SO hard to finally decide, so be proud of yourself for taking the step:)