me and my wife are at it

[johnnycat25]

fighting with my wife already.....just bought her pills yesterday!  and she's asking for more money today, i think this is going to be the hardest part! i told her i wasn't going to punish her for not quiting yet, but sure am not going to keep spending the same money as when we were bothing needing them.....she thinks i'm going to leave her when i'm finally sober and i keep telling her i wont.... i mean we have been togther for 12 years and i love her to death, i just dont know how to do this. she acts like i'm wrong for talking about money, but with work solow it is an issue.. one that helped open my eyes to quit. i dont want to fight but i get so mad i cant see straight and being on edge is not helping...i wont leave her and i cant change her so how do i live with her?

[johnnycat25]

i know the situation is bad but i love and need her..... she compleats me. i just have to hold on till we get back to who we were. i wish she were ready to quit, i just thought that if i got clean, i would be stronger and could help her. i hope this dosen't backfire.

[avisg]

johnny,
Having two people in a family where both are addicts and one stops and the other doesn't is very difficult the longer you are clean the more you will understand this not to mention having to pills in your home is greatly increasing your chances of a relaase .I hope that soon she will decide to quit as well.

[johnnycat25]

she has always been afraid i'd leave and i dont know why? i tell her i love her everyday and do what i can to help out, when i'm not working. every aspect of our lives together is cool....ups and downs like everyone with kids and ex's, but even when we were using toghther we would fight over it and thats another reason i wanted to quit~~~~ didn't want to lose her over this, just didn't count on this part of it!!!! i loved her before this and i'll still love her after this. i just dont want to hurt her feelings in the mean time

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Dude - you might need a semi of valium it sounds like. At least you are communicating - try and keep it that way. You might have to employ some conflict avoidance behavior modification....but it does sound like she is not 100% secure with your relationship - and you know how being short of pills is such a drag.........dont know how to get you to have her realize that it isnt even really a money issue. This disease is flat out trying to kill people. It doesnt matter how much money you have ... its never enough. The classic '1's too many and 1'000 arent enough is true,,,I have seen this show all around the world - and the user never wins.