new me new post

[tigerlily75]

Well, my other thing was running way long, plus i have a brand new attitude! I fought through this horrible day, and then realized i have i think 2 weeks clean today! And then I read through my whole other thread and all of this led ti me believing i can do this, i can make it, and i need better aftercare this time! so im going ti go to na, my therapist, church, here, and het me a sponsor!

[kyle505]

Honestly, I think that no matter how much clean time any of us have, all we do, day by day, is keep trying. If we stop trying we end up back on that slippery slope.
And I admire you - you are approaching a big family-based holiday, carrying around all the baggage that we will always carry, and yet you are looking forward to some of the aspects of a big gathering. That's great, and shows that you are headed down the right path.
Have a great Thanksgiving. Oh, one thing though (and I don't me to pile on with negatives)…but I heard that if the wind doesn't calm down there won't be any of the character balloons in the Macy's parade!!!  I can't handle that.
Take care.
K

[tigerlily75]

Well just getting off work. I'll have off thru Monday for holidays, but both my kids are out of school too, and my parents will be at the house and I don't know what's better, working being exhausted then family stuff or holiday family stuff oh boy, this should be fun! My parents actually might go out of town so it would be just me and the kids which might be nice. And this is the first year in many that I'm not hosting thanksgiving and cooking everything and having all family here. Kind of sad but kind of excited!
anyway I just feel weird, like really bored but no energy to do anything and my bathroom issues are back out of nowhere and I just feel nauseous. And achy and cramping and happy and positive and depressed and anxious and like I just don't really know what to do with myself...oh this is quite the rollercoaster...but its also a merry go round and round, the whole pill life is...well im stopping the merry go round and getting off, but then its like I'm thrown right onto a rollercoaster and I'm just tired of this circus!!!!

[tigerlily75]

Oh, that was so nice! Maybe wonder woman is real, and one of her alias may be tigerlily, but there's some wonderwonan or superman in all of us here!
and yea, I do have it pretty hard, nobody knows the half of it! But I've drounded all that out with pills for so long, its going to take alot of adjustments

dominosarah, thanks, keeping busy is the last thing I want to do! Want to just lay in bed all alone and sleep or watch a movie, but hey its not my reality!
sooooo, I'm just gonna go ahead on and get on with my big bad self!!!

[dominosarah]

As long as we keep trying we never fail.  

I am glad to see you keeping busy.  That is the best thing right now, even tho your body doesnt feel like that!!  

I thought the saying was get on with your big bad self!!!!!

[Pat1956100]

Well I think she's real.  I think her other alias is tigerlily (we had a cat named tigerlily when I was a kid).

Wow tigerlily, you really do have it tough.  I just can't imagine raising my son without the help of my family.  Just try and remember that you are doing the best that you can and it is them that has the problem.  How can they sit and watch you without helping?  That is just so wrong.
It is what it is though and I guess you just have to make the best of it.  
Try picking up a cooked chicken and a bagged salad or other quick good meals.  I can remember doing that often after work.
Please keep posting.  I really want to know how you are doing.
Hugs
Pat

[tigerlily75]

Oh and Kyle your awesome and yes you did tell me I can make it! And I am! Trying anyway;)