Aa
rut
frist time posting,cant break the cycle kick over the weekend and get scared about going to work and start all over
need help
need help
Hi :)
Are you still around? How's it going? Still going to try this weekend? I was thinking that if you do, it would be a good idea to start by not doing anything tonight (Thursday) in order to give yourself more time. Is there any possibility of calling sick on Monday?
I understand we're your at. You just have to put together a good plan. You can do this! Many of us thought we never could. I hear you when you say that you're rattled but please, don't give up. Don't say 'to hell with it' (or that's where you'll stay).
Please, keep posting. Were here.
Are you still around? How's it going? Still going to try this weekend? I was thinking that if you do, it would be a good idea to start by not doing anything tonight (Thursday) in order to give yourself more time. Is there any possibility of calling sick on Monday?
I understand we're your at. You just have to put together a good plan. You can do this! Many of us thought we never could. I hear you when you say that you're rattled but please, don't give up. Don't say 'to hell with it' (or that's where you'll stay).
Please, keep posting. Were here.
Thank you all for caring you guys rock, the thing is I blew it so many times taking off of work is not an option. I just got off of work that's why it took so long for my response, I must do this this weekend or I am done, I am hoping with your wonderful support I can get through the mind games I have done it before on such a short time frame I am hoping I have the strength to do it again ,you are so right I keep leaving the door open to go back its just to easy to say the hell with this. I will give this one more try but this time I will clean house get rid of all my numbers on back up just in case I need that little shot to get to work I have to tough it out. The thing is I am so rattled am doing more then I ever have, after read your letters I am going to slow down starting now. You are right I am more scared continuing on this present course I need to take my life back, thank you so much for your best wishes, I look forward to talking to you this next very important weekend
No one can start to help or support you until you make the first real effort to stop even taper off. I'm not being harsh, I was there until 10 days ago. Mine was 300+ mg oxy daily now using 30mg daily. I to knew I was an addict, wanted to change, but didn't. I should of OD several times but one night I looked at my daughter sleeping and realized she would be the one to find me and something snapped. Everyday the withdrawals get easier physical. Then I am going to talk with my Dr about the mental issues and hope my body will teach my brain to work correctly again.
There. Is support here but we can't carry the full load for you. You have admitted to someone you need help, which is great. Now you have to find your own snapping moment that brings you to the truth that you have to change. My first two days cutting down was killer but I researched everything I could find about opiate addiction, withdrawal, treatments, death rate, ect. I had to know the answers for myself then I asked for support.
I hope you have come to terms with your abuse and want to commit to not giving into the mind when it says you need it. You don't!! Quitting won't be as bad as the roller coaster ride and the irritation of chasing it down. Good luck!!!
There. Is support here but we can't carry the full load for you. You have admitted to someone you need help, which is great. Now you have to find your own snapping moment that brings you to the truth that you have to change. My first two days cutting down was killer but I researched everything I could find about opiate addiction, withdrawal, treatments, death rate, ect. I had to know the answers for myself then I asked for support.
I hope you have come to terms with your abuse and want to commit to not giving into the mind when it says you need it. You don't!! Quitting won't be as bad as the roller coaster ride and the irritation of chasing it down. Good luck!!!
I've been doing h for many years I all ready fd up so he I go again I must stop this weekend has to be the last, I cant take this any more. I am hoping with your support and going to meetings I will get through this nightmare
hi thanks so much for your response im doing 10 bags of h a day i stop every Friday go to work Saturday come home and crash. I start taking subs 24 hours later and go through all the wd,s I am off on Monday and the physical part is bad but not so bad its the mental part knowing I must go back to work Tuesday. I then tell my self let me do just some to get over the hump and then there I go again one is never enough
Hello and Welcome- It sounds like you need to try a different plan if the old way isn't working. Maybe you could try tapering which is what I did. You need to commit to the process but it's a far more comfortable way to go. You also need support through a program of recovery. It's what has worked for most of the members here.
Tell us a bit more about yourself and how we can help. You can do this!
Tell us a bit more about yourself and how we can help. You can do this!
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I'm glad you're here. It's a good start!
Although many people have successfully tapered off of pills, there is no way that I'm aware of to 'taper' off of heroin on your own. It just doesn't work that way.
I too was an H addict for many years & am familiar with the sort of 'weekend kick' that is your chronic stumbling block. It was mine too & what a misery it was! Spending the week trying to maintain your habit (& hide it) & then the weekend in total misery trying to get rid of it -- sheer insanity & not the way we were made to live. I would always collapse between hours 72 to 96 which seemed like the worst for me. The thing I realized years later, after I got clean, was that @ the time I was doing this, I didn't really want to stop & also didn't understand what it would require. What I was doing was half-as$ed & I was aware of it at the time but was so consumed by the drug & wrong-headed thinking that I continued in the 'rut'/cycle you describe. How does this apply to you?:
Well, you already know what you're doing is ineffective & yet you keep trying the same thing (addict thinking for sure:) You say that you're afraid. We all were in one way or another. This fear is your habit speaking. It has taken over every aspect of your life & sublimated your natural desire to do good for yourself & others. It's been calling the shots & every time you let it, it reinforces the message that your 'incapable' or 'weak' without it. You're not. It's a lie. Start fighting that voice with every fiber of your being. What's required here is a practical plan & some serious soul-searching.
First, you can't kick dope on your own in a weekend! I think you already know this. You need more time! You say that you've been using for years. We didn't get addicted in a weekend so it's only reasonable to accept that a brief detox won't work. Are you working at the moment? If so, you need to take a week or two off. The first couple of things you've got to do to make this work are: cut all your sources to opiates -- to the people, places & things around them. This idea might seem too 'final' right now but again, that's because your habit is ruling you & doesn't want you to commit. Truly kicking is an all or nothing deal -- 'fence-sitting' -- leaving a window open -- will always lead to relapse (because that's what was in the back of your mind when you did it).
I hear you when you say you're so sick of it & you've got to stop. You CAN do this but you've got to change your game plan. If there was a hole in a street you kept falling into, you'd find a way to walk around it or go down a different street, right? Well, this is the exact same situation. The second thing you've really got to understand is that getting the drug out of your system is not the end goal. Keeping it out of your system is! That's where the ultimate challenge lies. This requires a new understanding about what it means to be an addict, It requires an acceptance from you -- a determination to live life in your 'own skin' without reaching for something when you feel stressed. (I think that facing this thought is the crux of our fear). Dope & certain thought patterns are the enemies right now. You lived without it once & you can absolutely do it again! You're so much stronger than you know. Dare to believe it! It just takes work & patience. Sure, you'll be uncomfortable for a while but it's a small price to pay to enter the world of the living -- to feel & do again with a clear head & heart. Life without dope offers promise & a self-respect that are literally impossible while addicted.
I'll leave it at that for now. I just wanted you to know that this is doable but you're going about it in a way that will never work. You don't have to live this way & there's no reason to be fearful. The thing that should scare you is continuing on your present course. Heroin has a way of stopping time till one day (if you're still amongst the living) you wake to find that you've been on for decades with very little to show for that precious irretrievable time. That would be a tragedy. We only get one life -- one go round. Time to take yours back, no? You're worth it! :)
There are practical suggestions that we can give you to make the kick a little less uncomfortable for you & most importantly, there are some wonderful folks here who would be happy to support you through your detox & beyond. Please, let us know you're thinking & feeling.
We're here & we're pulling for you :)