11 weeks 2 days

[mcray]

All of my friends still do painkillers. I can't hang out with any of them without them being around. I am hanging in there though. I am on Suboxone and don't plan on quitting soon. I can't handle being home with pills everywhere. It's terrible. My friend's lives are ruined. They are run by pills. I have my girlfriend and my family and a friend or two who are sober. I'm hoping for a change, but I don't see one coming soon. I want my friends back.

[mcray]

Haha, it's alright. It's the internet, no way to be sure.

[worried878]

LOL...sorry...just always assumed u were a girl...i am so glad u told me...LOL

[worried878]

i thought u wre a girl

[mcray]

BOY BOY BOY! HA I'm a boy! I know there is a girl in my picture, sorry for the confusion. That's my girlfriend.

[worried878]

Glad u r hanging in there girl...friends are important at ur age...i am very thankful for my friends at my age...friends are special...u will make new friends and for now u need to hang with safe people..those who love u and those who can think straight...ten years from now u will look back at your "dirty" friends and see this was just not that important in the scheme of things

[mcray]

Haha, I'll see what I can do. I believe I did alright in school. I am taking more Hotel Management courses next year. I can't wait, really. I like being at school. It helps when I'm trying to stay sober. My girlfriend and school. They both help dramatically. I wanted to make sure I post on this site, at least occasionally. I don't want to forget who helped a lot in this process. I owe thanks to a lot of those on this site. I know you guys do it out of the goodness of your heart, and that's amazing to me. I also like to offer support. Makes you feel nice. Thanks to all who have helped or talked with me.

[corey411]

Well it sounds like you do have a plan. Are you at least not increasing the Sub?

Unfortunatly these drugs will really change a nice person into someone who would steal from their best friend. I'm suprised they give you any respect bc eventually you lose respect for yourself and you can't give away what you don't have. The changes in them are from the drugs though. Unfortunatly most will not get off them. Glad to see you are still in school. Hotel management right? If you get a job in a tropical resort you'll have to hook me up with a nice room...maybe Maui. Good to hear from you again Mcray. Corey

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

I do know how widespread and devastating this problem is son - and I am sorry that it is that way. As we said - you can only rescue you. I still advocate becoming involved in some volunteer work to meet new people. Only you know what your town and population are like. I live in a larger town that has at least a few of everything!  So that makes it easier for me to do those type distractions like volunteer work. It would really be nice if there were some way that you really could help your contemporaries see the light now instead of on their own schedule....you know how bad it can get - and fast too. stay in touch here and maybe we can come up with something....

[mcray]

Good to hear from you, Corey. I know that when I get off the subs it's going to be hard. My legs are going to be so restless. I have gone off of them for a few days before I was prescribed them... It was hell at night. I need to stay on the subs for the summer. I cannot be in this town without the subs. I would be too tempted and stuff. My girlfriend is the only person I can hang out with and not be worried about being around them. She works a lot now, though. None of my friends have any respect. Some even have the nerve to ask me to use my phone for deals. I cannot believe them. I can't do anything about it, other than ask for respect... Which they will give. But I can't get away from it during the summer. Next summer I hope to land an internship or something to keep me away from it all.

[corey411]

Hi Mcray, Glad to see you are still off the oxys. Please do listen to theeagle about the sub. I don't have personal experience on it but have been reading alot of posts and you do need to make a plan to get off of it sometime soon. Remember it was a few months ago when you were home at a party and taking more than you got from your doc. These drugs can be misleading bc your getting them from your doctor but you are suppose to taper off of them. The longer that you are on them the harder it will be to get off.

I know that sometimes it seems like everyone is on drugs but you can only help you. You cannot make your friends quit so don't feel like you are failing them. It is good that you want to be a good example. My son had to move out of state to get away from here bc every single friend he had except 1 was on oxys. As you get through school and life goes on you will make new friends that you have grown to have more in common with. I'm afraid for you in the situations that you put yourself in bc I know how hard this is to beat. You need to stay away from people, places and things that have to do with using and try to start tapering off that Sub. Congratulations on not using oxys in 11 weeks 2 days. I'll be looking forward to reading your post when you are off the Sub for 11 weeks and 2 days. I know you can do it. You sound like a really cool guy. Hope your still doing good at school. Corey

[mcray]

I am not saying everyone does pills for any other reason than the fact that everyone in this town DOES do pills. I come from a small town and everyone and their girlfriend's are doing them. Kids as young as freshmen in high school. We have a very bad problem. The high school sport stars are pill heads, I was one of them. All of the kids my age do them, the ages above and below me as well. EVERYONE truly does do them. There are a select few who don't, few of who I get along with. The people I meet at an NA meeting will be older people. I want some friends my age. There are no kids my age who do not use. I'm not offended or mad at your previous post, but I am really not saying that everyone does it just to make it seem acceptable. I cannot find people who don't do them, at least occasionally.

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Well everyone doesnt do the pills although it may seem like it from your homeboy's. Back in my youth we had to try and tell folks that everybody smoked pot! That isnt even true. But at least you understand whats going on. Keep it up by being a positive example for your other friends. And you can find others if you look in the right places - maybe even an NA meeting. Do some volunteer with an organization that you like  - you will meet sober people there.....and encourage those friends that are interested to check it out even further. And educate yourself about the sub - some good articles here in the health pages...just don't take them any longer than you have to - ideally a month or two at best.....but the sub are much better than the other alternatives. Keep posting and let us know how you make out - you might even have your other "friends" read through these posts and see if they recognize themselves - best to you

[mcray]

I know. I know. I just need to be on the subs for the summer, while I am back home. I can do fine at school without them. I try to show them all. Some are interested, some not. I just wish they'd all get sober. I cannot even find other friends that don't do painkillers because every single person does them. It's sad.

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Don't plan on being on the sub too long - just read some of the posts further down if you want to know why. You can only save yourself - but you need to do that. You are lucky to have the family and girlfriend and a few others that are sober. Best influence that you can be is to show your other friends that life is better when you are present to live it.....