Weaning and weakness

[Eebb26]

Why does everyone seem to see weaning /tapering as w weakness or excuse. I can't take off work to WD or say I have the 'flu' I have two kids and have to try to wean first. I have to try plus my dr said to do that, he didn't want me doing CT due to other health issues I have. I feel so judged though when I post this or when I mentioned it at NA last night.

[cleaninitup]

When I jumped from 2 a day after being on that amount for alittle over a week it wasnt too bad. I had the hot/cold chills and alittle restless legs-mostly my arms were the restless ones.Strange but thats where it hit the worst.I didnt really have diarreha until day 9-I think it set my IBS off.After reading of so many other wd symptoms I think I got off easy ( but wont forget) The mental part is very hard, wondering how I could just get a few pills to just to get through 2 more days of having pills. BUt knowing in my head also it will just delay it all by 2 days. It was something I was the hardest part just getting them out of head. I went to my reg doc(she wasnt the one perscribing) after being off for 4 days and told her all and was put on prozac and xanax for the anxiety because both were getting bad. Please any questions you want we are here to help and wishing you the best through all of this. Heather

[tingtongtom]

I have been to many doctors and heard different things. tapering is tricky as the drug is there, but it is often dangerous to flat out stop. My current doctor has given me some antidepressents that are will stop wiyjdraw symptoms and which are also social anxiety meds.

[petroglyph54]

Tapering isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength and willpower. There, more better. I was at 200mg a day around Christmas, tapered down to 140 and leaped. Wow, that didn't work. Mine was pretty violent, and I only made it I think around 26 hours? I tore up my lateral muscles and damaged a disc in the throws of wd. I made the choice to continue my taper to a lower dose, which took about 3 weeks down to under 40mg a day. It was still unpleasant and I withdrew pretty hard for 3 days and then it got noticeably different each day. I found out that even that first 26 hours cold turkey, did definately do a reset in my opiod tolerance level but my pain level as well. That next day 80mg worked, enough to keep the pain manageable and not consume more than that.Everyone's journey is different. I go to n/a meetings, not every day but often enough. One person's opinion at n/a or here is just that, an opinion. You are the only one who know's what you are willing and able to do to get off this crap and lead a happy and fullfilling life without narcotics. You are doing just fine! Progress is progress. Yeah, you will feel the wd's longer, but at your max. dose, jumping would be hard to conceal. Tortoise and the hare, slow but sure will win this, but that's only if whoever is administering your dosage sticks to the schedule as well.

[Eebb26]

Thanks for all the support and advice. My goal is to be off PERIOD! However I get there, a long as I get there that's what matters. My kids are my #1 priority and they need mommy here and strong. Unfort I lost my dad a few moths ago and my 1 year old was hospitalized w pnumonia so I missed a LOT of work and can't afford another day off. It's not an excuse, just my reality. And I do work Saturday's so weekend detox isn't an option. I just need to be strong and have damn willpower

[IBKleen]

You are doing a good job and it is great that you have help and support from your husband. I know you want to get this done and you are surely on your way to doing that. Be careful with the taper and don't make too many jumps too quick. At each jump (or drop in dose), give your body the chance to get used to the drop and then go form there and so on. It may get a little tougher as you go down so post if you have any questions. There is a lot of great support here and many members have experience with tapering and can share with you what worked for them.

Hang in there and be good to yourself.

[GMcp]

and ill give you this to think about id take 12-16 or more a day depended on how big my last script was and how much pain i was in but towards the end i will admit i was using them for the high not the pain, and i went from 16 a day at the end to 2 a day, im only on day 2 but id rather get it over with so i went down fast and drastically my kids is y i did it so low i want my kids to have there mommy back so bad back to normal i mean, so its worth it to be a little sicker to get it done that much faster, and really the way i see it is you would feel just as ****** tapering slowly than fast and it will end faster if u do it fast right? but dont care what others think tell them to keep there nasty opinions to them selfs its your life you are the one going through this not them!

[dominosarah]

Yes you are going in the right direction and being scared is normal.  It is a big change but a GOOD change!!

[Ashelen]

I do agree with Sara, if it works for you it doesn't matter what other people say. I didn't mean to say that you SHOULD go CT, just sharing my thought process and story in case it helps you.

You are definitely going in the right direction - I hope you didn't think I was saying you weren't, I just meant to say that I totally understand your fears.

hope we can help each other!

[Eebb26]

I am down from 15-20 pills a day to 10-11 a day. I jumped from 15-20 to about 12 & now trying to get to 10 a day and then in a few days, 9 and so on.  My husband will have All my pills and yet will be rationed daily. I trust him to help me. If I don't have them to take then I can't take them. Maybe I'm postponing cuz I am scared but who isn't? At least I'm going in the right direction right????

[dominosarah]

Dont worry about what others think.  This is about you.  You and your doctor feel that tapering down is the way for you to go so just stay on your course.  I think sometimes people feel that tapering down is just prolonging the process and all the variables arent added into the mix when they say that.  Not everyone can go ct off their meds.  You just keep doing what you are doing as you are doing great!!          sara

[GMcp]

i hear ya, i want to go to a meeting but fear i will be judged as well because im tapering off, i too have kids 3 of them, and im sick on day 2 from only taking 2 a day i cant Imagen how id feel if i did ct id die!  my kids would suffer and it be so much worse. i guess you just have to let them be jerks and just ignore them, its not a weak way of doing it at all! we gotta do what works for us

[Ashelen]

I understand your pain...I have 2 small children ( 9 months and 2 1/2 years) who rely solely on me as a caretaker - my husband works long hours so they are my responsibility probably 20 out of 24 hours a day....and those 4 he helps as much as he can but not a ton.

I'm doing a rapid wean off of 5mg hydrocodone 3x a day (I wasn't an "addict" persay but I am tired of taking meds to deal with pain so I'm going through all the same things as everyone here, just without the big mental battle - although trust me, it's still a battle...fear is a strong emotion) and I'm considering just jumping off right here....I'm already feeling withdrawals all day long and my head is in a fuzzy cloud and I'm ready to be done with the hard part...I know that the sooner I jump the sooner I'll feel better, so this weekend I plan to jump no matter how far I've weaned down.

I want this OVER WITH. honestly..the sooner you begin, the sooner you'll begin to heal. I know you're taking a lot more than I am and yes weaning down to at least a smaller number will HELP...but really, you are going to suffer anyway. everyone here keeps saying "rip the band-aid off slowly, or rip it off quickly" and after tapering for a few days..I know exactly what they mean.

good luck whatever you choose! hopefully you and I can support each other :-)

[Dav125]

When I got there (2 pills and jumped), I had some energy and sleep issues, but was amazingly void of normal aches ,pains and running to the bathroom issues at all hrs of the night which I had experienced on two prior occassions..When you do get close to stopping, have some immodium on hand just in case you experience stomach issues...The second and third week for me seemed to be actually tougher than the actual physical wd's. The mental day after day without major change was doing overtime in my head. As I had a reason to know why I felt run down those first few day. The next couple of weeks has sleep ,depressive thoughts and some anxiousness still working on me. But inbetween the 20th and 25th day I started rebounding fast

[udoschoices]

Look it's not about weakness its just that as an addict- most times it's really hard to do an honest taper. Why? Because you seek out the good feeling.. I tried so many times to allocate so many pills to taper, say 10 on one day, 7 next, 5, 3.. The first day worked- but next day I would take all 7 to get the high, then later in day the other 5, then say screw it and eat the 3.. It's VERY hard is what we are telling you because of addiction. If you can do it, great. But dropping just 2-3 pills off of each day each week- you are honestly just prolonging the process and taking weeks to taper just means weeks that you are taking all those pills.

We hear that you cant do CT because of your kids and other things. I understand- but at the end of your taper you will be withdrawing and it won't feel good and you may feel bad longer than if you just went with it. Everyone on here speaks from experience and for many of us- tapering was a way to just keep taking more until we finally figured that out and just jumped. If you can get someone to ration them out to you it may work.. Just remember you will still get withdrawal symptoms which is why many people just say get it over with over a few days.

You have to do what works for you- hang in there and try to keep a positive attitude.. Nobody is judging you or knocking you trying to taper, just giving you our experiences. It's not easy trust me I know- you just have to fight and do what it takes to take yourself back from the pills

[IBKleen]

Just keep asking questions right here hun---that way we can follow you.

BTW, how many pills are you down to on your taper right now? I ask because often people will jump when they get down to a lower dose because the withdrawal sets in and it can drag. With cold turkey you will get it over with in about 4 or 5 days and a lot of people find that easier and more comfortable. So where are you at with this?

[Eebb26]

When u went down to 2 and went CT, how was ur WD?

[Eebb26]

Sorry. I don't know how this thing works much less this addiction. I didn't know if u add to old posts or crest new ones. Sorry. I won't post anything new so others can get help.

[medicos]

It all depends how one takes ones words.

[cleaninitup]

I had to wean off of 5-7 vics a day for about a month so how everyone chooses to do it is differrent. I did go c/t when I hit 2 a day because at that point I felt I didnt need them any more. I would say that some that said just flush them were not aware of how many you are tapering from and they did mean well.

[IBKleen]

Hun, you have the top 3 posts going on this page. I am confused and finding it hard to help anyone else as your posts are pushing others down. Please stay in one post---the latest post is probably best and I think it is this one. Ask your questions here so we can follow you and help other members as well.

Again, hang in there. Never mind what others think. Getting clean is about you so keep doing what you are doing!!! You are doing all the right things and I give you a lot of credit.

[Eebb26]

And I don't mean everyone, just ALot. I'm sensitive so ignore my rants.

[Eebb26]

I dint know how long. I'm down from 15 pills a day to about 10-12. Doesn't seem like a big change but it does tale some willpower. I plan to drop a pill every few days. So it may take several weeks If I do the math

[Htownnofrown]

Don't worry about that. Some people don't understand the need for weaning off a dose. I had the privilege of going to rehab to get off heroin and other opiates, but not all do. Keep fighting the good fight! How much longer will you be tapering?

[IBKleen]

Who is everyone? I don't know anyone, or ever heard anyone say that tapering is a weakness or excuse. I think it is helpful if you can pull it off. Tapering is hard and I always recommend that you have someone help you if possible---like hold the pills and give them to you per the schedule to avoid temptation.

A positive attitude goes a long way during detox so ignore the negative comments and keep going forward. I think you are doing great!!!