Aa
what a waste
I am just shy of 5 months clean and here i am in so much pain. It just never ends, i finally get my life back together, get clean and now i am a mess. All the pain to get clean and stay clean was just a waste of time for me. How is one to live in pain and be opiate free, and yet can't take opiates because they got the best of me. Off to the surgeon on thursday to see what the heck is wrong with me, at this point i am just so frustrated, scared, and depressed. I CT the Cylmbalta and that was he!!, and now this, it just never ends. Depression has kicked in on overdrive and my quality of life has deteriorated, what do i have to look forward too, absolutely nothing:( Sorry to be such a downer i just needed to vent out my frustrations.
Best Answer
I'm in a similar boat as you, though my clean time pales in comparison.
All I can think of is to explore other addiction groups, like food addiction or sex addiction. I find these are different than substance addiction because you can't not eat and you can't not...well, you can, but that's no fun. So I'm going to check them out and see if I can learn management techniques for my own surgery that's coming up. I don't know if there's something there that may be valuable to you, too.
Whatever the case, like others have said, your hard work is NOT a waste. You've done an amazing thing, and that you keep on going despite chronic pain is a testament to your resolve. I hope that you're able to find a solution that you're comfortable with.
All I can think of is to explore other addiction groups, like food addiction or sex addiction. I find these are different than substance addiction because you can't not eat and you can't not...well, you can, but that's no fun. So I'm going to check them out and see if I can learn management techniques for my own surgery that's coming up. I don't know if there's something there that may be valuable to you, too.
Whatever the case, like others have said, your hard work is NOT a waste. You've done an amazing thing, and that you keep on going despite chronic pain is a testament to your resolve. I hope that you're able to find a solution that you're comfortable with.
I completely agree with EVERYTHING Vicky said. You can do this and there is a solution in all of this. I know how strong you are and I KNOW with hubby, your Dr. and youself, you WILL find the solution. You are in my thoughts today and I know come tomorrow you will feel emotionally some better. Dane you are one strong girl and I will be thinking of you, it WILL be okay.
hi guys i am here not feeling too good as yesterday was a very difficult day for me. I just needed to be alone so i did isolate myself a bit and then went to dinner with hubby as he is so worried about me, and i ordered a drink, and then another, i don't want to hear crap about that either it was better than the alternative. After dinner i fell asleep and was wide awake around midnight, so hubby decided he wanted to talk, well that did go over to well. I am not a talker i internalized all my feelings so he is pulling me for information, poor guy is just so worried about my emotional state and my leg. The questions he was asking me just were so overwhelming, "What if you need another surgery?" What if the dr says this is your new way of life"? ETC..... Well, i got into panic mode got up, to go to bed as i was not feeling well and the dizziness just continued, and BAM i feel flat out on my head/face, and fainted. NOw that i look like a beat up gal, my husband is a mess, i scared the crap out of him and then the poor guy felt so guilty, he feels that he pushed me to hard. What am i a flipping dainty flower!!!!! I should be able to handle a conversation that i am use to, this is not news to me about my medical condition as this is something i have been through my entire life. As for the AD med, no i am not on anything, it didn't do crap and i didn't like the side affects, if i was not in pain i would be fine. "mama bear" I didn't take any meds, i do not have any or access to any, and i don't want any. Rehab never discussed taking pain meds they preach the holistic approach. i will have no choice to come up with a plan after i see what the doc says tomorrow, and yes he knows about my opiate addiction and he is not the kind of man to care about that or understand it, he would just say take the meds. So really i am doomed, i either am going to hear this is the best its going to get and deal with it, or you need another surgery, either way they both s u c k. Seriously it just never ends, and going back on pills will only lead me back to where i was 5 months ago, and that was not a pretty site as allot of you know.
Sorry about being like this, i just do not know what to do anymore....
Sorry about being like this, i just do not know what to do anymore....
Okay , I am getting worried here, PLEASE let us know how you are, we ALL care about you and NEED to hear from you!!!!! I just knew when I logged on, we would have heard something from you,we care let us know SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!
COMMUNITY LEADER
Dane.....Be a good girl and let us know what is going on with you. If you dont you wont be a good girl.
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
I'm here sipping my coffee (mmmm delicious) and thinking about you. I see EXACTLY where you're stuck and, you're right, you're miserable either way!
Usually there's a "happy medium" in difficult situations. Look for it. I can see one right now. First, manage the pain and then manage the addiction. One may balance the other...
You can't be in pain Dana. Everyone knows that will destroy quality of life. but, you CAN control the addiction. I've told you this with other words. Just because we've been addicted to pills does NOT mean we can never take them again! We just have to watch it!! So, if you take the pills for pain and find you're taking more than needed because they're so lovable, you'll have to be aware of it and intervene with yourself. That's why you have a support system in place.
You're not an island Dana. You're not alone in this! You've been dealt a pretty s h itty hand in this life so now you need to WORK WITH IT! You can't change anything but you can work around it. I really think you can get to place of comfort and happiness just by compromising and accepting a few things. My advice is to talk with your husband today and get yourself some pain meds. A little chat with the doctor tomorrow is in order as well. There's a solution and a plan for this, just stop being so ------- independent!
Love, Mama Bear