how to stop my husband from yelling at me?

[snowchild16]

My husband and I have been together for 7+ years and married for 4 years now and we have a 20 month old son. We are both working professionals. Ever since I have been pregnant, my husband has been yelling at me when he gets stressed out by any situation. If my alarm clock went off and I didn't turn it off quickly enough he would scream at me "TURN OFF THE F****ING THING". When our son was little and woke up at night to feed, he would scream at me if I didn't wake up quickly enough. When our son was sick and had a high temperature, he started screaming at me. Recently he got fired from his job, because he screamed at the HR. This morning our car's battery died and he started screaming at me. My reaction varies between complete confusion, to panic, to sometimes screaming back at him. I feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells. After each screaming episode he would not talk to me for a few days and then act as if nothing happened and be overly nice to me. If I dare to bring it up with him, he gets mad at me again. For the past 7 months he has slowly stopped socializing with all our friends, he does not like us going to our friend's place or going anywhere. I'm from another country and don't have any family here. When after one of his screaming episodes I threatened to leave him he said he would take my son away from me. I feel really isolated and depressed. I want to make our marriage work, but I feel like I'm losing my sanity on this roller coaster ride.
How can I stope all the yelling and cursing? I know this is having a very negative effect on my child.

[MsC67]

help me my husband just HAD to retire and he yells constantly. every little thing from not putting cookies on a xmas plate right to stirring the pasta with the wrong spoon. Day after day. help me

[londonchris59]

He has to start respecting you for who you are. This is very serious and if he can't do you should better leave him sooner rather than later.

[timesareforchange]

I've been reading some of the follow up posts on this page, and most of the posts I read are form the victims, be they male or female. Not much offered by way of solutions. Obviously there is not quick and easy fix. I landed on this page, because I am the verbally abusive boyfriend looking to change. And I can say that after spending 30 minutes reading the posts here last night, I woke up this morning, spoke to my GF in a friendly tone, and gave her a kiss. I know that it's only day one, but it seems to me, that I need to continue reading/research/educating myself, for at least 30 minutes a night.

To all the victims, as far as I know, as of now, all you can do is :

a) decide whether you think your partner is willing to change
b) if they are, have them come here and spend some time reading/learning. If they are not, I suspect you are in a relationship which will either ultimately, tragically fail, or you will live a very long, lonely and sad life.

How many murder/suicides do you see on the news each night, and how many don't you see. I think the difference is education. Educating yourself if you are the perpetrator, is the only way to change.

The more I think about it, the more all of the above makes sense to me. I can rave on endlessly with supporting reasons for the above, and I think I probably will with additional posts.

[daydreamer01]

I am  sorry to say the children are not a good reason to stay in an abusive relationship and it is unfair to them.My children told me they wondered why their lives were different from other children from divorced parents well first of all no matter what your issues are put your children first we never talked bad about each other to our children and even though it was different and difficult we did not want our children to suffer so they never had to live the life of children in a divorced relationship we still did things as a family and kept our children lives as normal as possible and now looking back on it we both realize we did give our children a close to normal as possible life .we are proud of that because to this day even tho they are grown they thank us for the normal stable life that makes it so worth it!.As for your relationship if you ant to fight for it and it is worth it try some type of counseling if you are sure there is no hope then it is best to move on.

[diva218]

It seems the nicer i get the louder he becomes. He yells and and curses then he later turns it around and blames it on all on me.

[joelk59]

Yes, I have been there, am there. Seems the bigger the ego- the louder the screaming

[rosy32]

hey guys im suffering with the same prblm we got married 7mnts ago from the day 4 he started showing anger at me he says that every women should listen to her husband women shoulkd not get anger or any emotions she should not have any emotions when i shout at him.some times he breaks all the valueble things and sometimes he himself hits to wall or windows im afraid of his behaviour i dont know what to do.if show anger at him he will say that he will give divorse to me .he will never spend time with me.always he will shout or roar at me.what to do pls any one let me out of this guys