My 2 1/2-year-old grandson

[TinaCs42]

My grandson is perplexing.  In our family we have Asperger's, apraxia, severe autism and PPD-NOS.  However, even though he displays some of the symptoms, he doesn't fit the standard criteria for any of these.  We also have a familial history of severe OCD which does affect ADLs and can even be life-threatening.  My father-in-law was obsessed with picking open his dialysis fistula and came close to bleeding to death several times.  Now, onto my grandson.  He is 2 1/2.  He is extremely intelligent and verbal, but he has his "own" language.  He can speak in 10-20 word sentences and has met all of his milestones, but while he's speaking, he talks in the typical sing-song voice and abbreviates everything.  He can reads, but has to read the same books over and over again, which is fine, it's what he wants to do.  He lines up all of his toys like some autistic kids do, but he catagorizes them by type of toy, what they're made of, size, color etc.  He can tell you who gave him what toy and when.  He will NOT make eye contact, except with his little sister who is 1 1/2-years-old.  Often, his ideas are scattered, for example, he'll say, "The ball is red, on the wall, and the plane was in the sky."  More often, his words and phrases have proper meaning, but he repeats himself like a broken record.  It's like his mind gets "stuck".  Physically, he was a very clumsy infant and would run into things constantly.  Now, he can do the same activities like balance and jumping that a 5-year-old would do.  He'll run in circles in the living room for hours on end.  He has No fear and is obsessed with walking in the road.  We literally have to keep him on a child safety leash.  He can't walk out of a room and leave the door open...it has to be closed.  He counts everything.  He is a very talkative friendly little boy, who won't show affection to anyone but his little sister, unless he gets a "booboo" or he's ready for bed.  His safety concerns me the most.  Then his speech as most of the time it is garbled.  Mom and grandma understand what he's saying.  I'm not worried about his education, because the boy loves to read and be read to.  My concern is his social interaction with others.  He has a couple of relatives who are low to high functioning autism and they are isolated from society.  How do we best address getting him on a better social-interactive level?  How do we keep him from unlocking the doors or windows and just walking out.  He has to be watched at all times because his "obsessions" are very strong.  Washing his hands and brushing his teeth are more of his little obsessions.  He cannot pass the bathroom without screaming to do this.  His anxiety attacks can be extreme with him in the fetal position, while screaming and rocking for an hour.  He does not self sooth.  He has to wear himself out.  My daughter is 22-years-old and has mild OCD which doesn't affect her ADLs.  I'm certain these things are familial, but what do I do to get help as my family cannot offer me any solutions?  This is just the tip of the iceberg with my grandson.  I have a whole list of "quirks."  Can you give me any advice on where to begin.  Since he's met all of his milestones, his MD is satisfied, but I'm frightened.

[TinaCs42]

Thanks for your input!  It's really appreciated.  Today, I actually got him to look me in the eyes for a few seconds and sit next to me and give me a hug and kiss!!!  I'm tickled pink!  It was AWESOME!  My daughter has a nurse come to her house for a KY program called "Every Child Succeeds."  She has sent an evaluation into Head Start for autism and speech therapy, but since he's met his milestones and has exceeded most, he has been turned down for evaluation.  I don't understand this.  Many kids who are autistic are above average to extremely intelligent.  He's kind of caught in the middle.  I guess were going to have to take matters into our own hands and seek out someone who can evaluate him and point us in the right direction.  Thanks again for your help and if you come up with any new ideas, please let me know.  Tina

[jdtm]

I'm probably "sticking my neck out here" but from what you wrote, it appears to me (a non-medical person) that your grandson has inherited traits of autism and anxiety and speech difficulties - probably Asperger's and OCD and possibily developmental apraxia.

So - where to get help? I would start with the family doctor and ask for a referral to a specialist as a child neurologist or child psychiatrist or someone with experience in autism and/or anxiety issues.  In our area, many of the specialists in autism and anxiety work in conjunction with a speech pathologist.  His age is not too young to begin.  I would also consider any organization or support group for autism and anxiety and speech as areas to get help.  I am wondering if you might have to be involved in three or more aspects of the medical community in order to get help.  This is a very difficult situation - I wish you the best ...