Great 5 year old boy turns sarcasic and nasty almost overnight

[jane601]

Hi there, my son is 5 and a half.  He has been at school since Feburary and prior to that in the same daycare since he was 9 months old as i am a single working mother.  My son and myself have always had a really tight relationship and it has been with mutal respect, love and fun.  He definately is a very independant, smart boy.  

My problem is that compared to two weeks ago when my son would say please, thank you....or have a grin and a good manner if i had to remind him.......to know he's all of a sudden Mr Sarsastic....i can ask "have you got your socks and shoes on"  (when i'm in the kitchen and can't see him)  and the answer is "of course not duhhhhh CANT YOU SEE")  it may sound petty, but this attitude is about every single little thing.  I've also noticed that he seems more sensitive if something goes wrong.  i.e. he shut his ballon in the car door today and it popped and he had a trantrum.  Whereas, prior to a couple ofweeks ago we probably would have had a laugh about how noisy it was.

I have thought if there are any new foods, people, etc in our lives and have drawn a blank.  I feel like i have a moody teenager in the house already, moody face, talking to me like i'm the child.......is this normal behaviour - i'm so sad as up until now my son and me have had a great relationship and i don't want to ruin it.  

Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated.  Thanks :) Jane

[margypops]

You have cracked it yes 10-11 year olds will probably do that, so maybe you can ignore some of the sarcasm, take things away he likes for the rude behavior, dont over react in fact no reaction to some of it .like the tantrum at popping his ballon, so if something like that happens you can be sorry but ignore the tantrum,it is a way of seeking attention, you dont take the bad stuff and the best way that works is to tell him okay NO PC tonight ,ot NO TV , anything he values do not allow .He will soon learn that rude behavior is not premitted, whilst you can ignore the minor things,.

[jane601]

thanks for that.  you could well be right.  He's just had school holidays and he was in a sports clinic for the past two weeks where they don't group the children by age, so he was hanging around with 10 and 11 year olds as well as peers his own age.  I think that you are right thanks.  Dad is not in the picture - hence doing the sports stuff as it's male teachers/role models which is what i thought my son needed.

[margypops]

Maybe it is learned, copied behavior, possibly he hears the friends at school doing the same thing, has he any older sibling or relatives around, what attitude has his Dad got, be aware of  any other attitudes around him.

[jane601]

thanks appreciated.  you've been going one year with this surly behaviour.....i don't think i can, i too have gone down the road of i'm the mum and yr the son etc, but the result wasn't good.....he just said that he will boss around his kids.  so i thought about that....am i bossy....and i don't think i am, we have simple rules which involve time keeping, hygeine and manners and i think i should stick to these, the other rules i am flexible.

[kimmy09]

hi my sons been doing that for the last yr he statred doing it when he changed school,he used to have the please and thank yous now he comes in and says get me this and get me that.if hes doing something naughty and i give him wrong he just grins and thinks its a joke.i have to remind him im his mum and not 1 of his school friends.