totally confused and desperate

[richtaz]

Can anyone help at all or have any idea.
I cant seem to find whats wrong with me i have been diagnosed with depression for 6 years and dont seem to improve by any great deals. doctor and specilast defnatley think its depression but i am not convinced. why well let me explain. I dont seem to have any direction in life at all,i feel detached,i tend to zone out allot,i cant remember dates very well etc,i cant seem to concentrate on any conversation,i seem to be always on the go can never truly relax,i cant seem to keep reltaionships because i tend to go numb and have auto thoughts that convince me i do not love them etc, i am always inpatient in anything, like i use to model build even when i was young and would get bored quickly and wait for someone else to finish it and play with it when it was done for me. i get side tracked easily. I have lost interest in life like things. i dont seem to care about anyone. i cant be bothered to do anything. i am very sensitive, i cry allot, energy levels tend to be low. get bored with everything quickly. i seem to get shakes,feel sick,feel numb , never content, sad allot,lonely,always talking too much in situations,memory poor, concentration average, irritable,stress easy,guilty allot.
so obviously i am not looking for anyone professional but i am just after if anyone else is similar etc.
thanks

[freddie8605]

In some level i relate on another level i don't. If you do want a professionals opinion then i would suggest putting this post in the Mood expert forum, which is were the doctors are on in this website, mostly. Um what you have written and please do realize i am not a doctor, it sounds kind of like a mixture of things including depression (which is were i think i relate ) for me i would say the depression would come into it when you say, low energy levels, although that could be psychical so you might want to get a GP doctor to check and make sure psychically okay, eg thyroid. also crying and being sensitive, irritability and guilty are/can be all signs of depression. Have you ever had a major trauma in your life including when you were young? As it might be something like PTSD or DID, as you state you feel numb, detached and zoned out and you don't remember things well.
But they could also be linked to extreme anxiety or even ADHD. I am not diagnosing you because i am not a doctor, so I can't. i have Bipolar disorder. and i suggest maybe seeing a new doctor if you don't agree with there treatment eg its not helping and maybe getting a second opinion on your diagnosis as well if you don't agree. What i have written are just possibilities and suggestions from someone who doesn't actually know very much.

Just my thoughts,
Hope it helps

[richtaz]

plus i have an a shamefull habbit that pops up and destroys everything. which for some reason i go for months with out doing then i go do it and ends up destroying relationships.