There is help out there. You've made the first step, and that is a big deal. You are reaching out and I think that is awesome. Look for therapists that specialize in PTSD... Look for groups, look for clinics. The help is there, you just have to find it...
Best wishes.
brice 1967 i guess I should have been more clear. P.T.S.D. is NOT what i need help for. yes I have ptsd. from a drug dealer putting a gun to my head. big woop I would do that again. more important is everything else I wrote. here is a little history. first off to my face my mom said she did not and never did care about me. big woop. I allays hated her. second when i was younger i set myself on fire.(got wrote up in the papers) problem was my sister was home so that did not work. I have taken pills but either thrown up or just gotten over their affects. I have been stabbed by a man hiding in a clothes rack. I have been in a bad motorcycle wreck. etc. bottom line is i am older now and still can not get a grip on life. my mind wander and reality fades. i have awful mood swings that are so radical it scares people. I need some help.