I have a good relationship with my Psychiatrist and I needed more help because I was suicidal a few months back so I also got a good therapist. Both my Psychiatrist and therapist tell me for me dissociation is o.k. Its a coping mechanism otherwise everything would be too overwhelming.
It took me awhile to find the right support for me. I know the depression won't last forever. I have been depressed on and off most of my life but I have a good life in spite of it. I have a great relationship with my husband. I have many good friends. I am successful in my career.
In thirty years I have been on many psychotropic drugs. My Drs. are still trying new things. Depression is a real disease but I seldom stay down in the depths of despair for as long as I used to. There is hope something I doubted twenty years ago.
Alex
Hi Star,
You have been told you have major depression and panic attacks and what you describe is consistent with that.
It does feel like the end of the world and is so terrifying you don't know what to do. I've been there too Star and wish I could stop it for you.
You say you feel numb. Without much detail it is probably your mind trying to protect you. When our depression reaches disaster like levels, like when we just cannot cope with the thoughts and symptoms any more our mind does try to protect us by shutting down a lot of the emotions and we become what is described as vegetative, or on the way to that.
I got there too. A place where you just don't feel anything really and just tend to sit and stare. You don't really respond to much of anything as you can't risk it. It's not a voluntary state, it is a natural state induced by the depression nightmare. I was in such a state for a while and the way out of it is to place your trust in your doctor and follow the advice you are given.
If you don't like the advice then maybe another doctor and ask here too.
It's not a good place to be and is so scary, I feel for you so much and wish things were different.
But do know this. It is not dying and you can come back from it as most do so. It just doesn't feel possible.
how do you deal with the numbness it doesnt scare you that you dont feel attach to anybody
What can I do to help? I am no expert just a person who has depression.
Alex
not yet i go on the 23 of this month
Sounds like what depression is like for me. I feel very hopeless and detached when I am depressed.
It has taken me many years of trial an error with medications. They are not one size fits all.
Are you talking to anyone?
Alex