Life's a bit crap when you have anxiety...

[Broggie1]

I've not been 'right' for some time (about 13 years)  I was on medication, namely Ritalin.  I've had anxiety issues since I was a child and am now 51.  Anyway about 13 years ago I was pretty fit, sleeping heartrate was 48bpm. I took a Ritalin tablet in the morning as usual and my heart began to race after a few minutes...I went to ED, and shall we say it wasn't the best experience of my life.
Since that time I have suffered PVC's PAC's and heartrate has been up...about 120-130 if I 'nip' upstairs in my house.  Awareness of heartbeat and depressive episodes.  Holter is normal, showing only sinus tach at times, and ectopics.
Winters are the worst time for me, as nothing is going on and I have too much time to dwell on my fears.  I fear death, have done so since a child when I watched my father battle with angina which has left me with a very negative mentality towards it.
My blood pressure is normal-ish 120/80, sometimes less, bloods normal, cholesterol on the UK scale last christmas was 3.4 which is excellent...I've had a stress test which showed no changes of note and reached THR after 9 minutes or so, no ischaemia, no pain...bit out of breath which is to be expected after jogging

Heartrate drop after stress test went down quite quick from THR but was a bit stubborn to drop under 130 for a few minutes.

Anyway back to today...over the last few weeks have broken my foot, so have been off work, stuck at home and palps have been a bit nasty to me...too much time on the internet and lo and behold I find out that earlobe wrinkles are a marker for Heart disease...check my ears...eeek I've got wrinkles....mood plummets, savage palpitations and miserable christmas...I spend the shopping trips with the girlfriend looking at people's ears to see if I'm the only one...and lo and behold apart from some people who are so old they've had tea with Tutankhamun, I am.

So to cut a long story short  (if that's possible) I have an awareness of my heartbeat (moreso when like a numbnut I worry about it) I have ectopic beats, and a bit of an (I feel) abnormal response to exercise, I dont smoke, drink very little as even a glass or two of wine will have my heart beating fast most of the night, slightly overweight but not hugely so, and could do with more exercise, but am sometimes less than motivated (UK weather doesn't help)

So the questions are.

1, Am I normal
2, Should I worry
3, Should I stop reading crap on the web and then getting paranoid about it
4, Is anyone else like me here...or am I the only nutter

It's a bit late but happy new year to you all.


Take care and best wishes.

Ray.

[LBBBguy]

Hi there, another Californian here.

I also experience that heartbeat awareness you describe and it bothers me too, and makes me worry that something isn't right, and maybe I'm going to die. So it's almost like the chicken and the egg, right? Am I anxious because of this heartbeat awareness, or am I becoming aware of my heartbeat because I'm having anxiety over learning about these heart problems.

I guess one thing I have learned through this experience, however, is that you can't let your mind start going on these negative feedback loops or it's only going to get worse. Personally, I find these boards helpful because I don't know anyone personally to really talk about this stuff with, and it definitely helps to talk and listen with others going through maybe similar stuff. However, they aren't a substitute for medical care. So if you really are concerned, you should see a doctor, and lay out all of your concerns and get them addressed.

And no, you're not a nutter. Although I do sometimes think that a lot of who are going through issues with our hearts could also use some kind of help with our minds as we do, as it seems very easy to get tripped up by anxiety at the same time.

[cindy707]

Hi from across the pond in California..i too am having a sleepless nite because of loud neighbors and decided to log on to see what is going on w. everyone else.  I can only answer your questions a little candidly....
1. Your first question its not abnormal to feel apprehension when things are going on w. your heart and feeling anxiety so yes you are pretty normal in tat respect.
2. The New England Journal of Medicine states that heart rates between 70 and 120 are within normal limits and if you see a heart doc w. follow ups you are probably pretty safe as long as you do follow thru.
3. Depends on what you are focusing on on the web....if its all negative scary stuff back out...look for positive stories and forums to read...change your habits
4.  You see how many posts are on this site w. alot of worried and scared people because the heart is something we take very seriously so obviously you are not a nutter you are just needing to vent and reach out to the rest of us.

My suggestion is to make and appt. w. a heart doc and tell him or her all of your worries and fears so that you can go on living your life in a positive and upbeat way because it sounds to me like you are pretty healthy over all.....sometimes we are our own worst enemies w. out imaginations.  Take the time...see the doc...get the answers.....
Happy New Year to you too!!!!