Aa
future healthcare professional with OCD about STDs
I have an irrational fear of catching an STDs, specifically HIV, HBV and HCV. As a future RN (I take my state boards next week) I know my fear is irrational. For an example today I just got a ten pannel STD test (my second in four months). I used the restroom at the facility and got some urine on the seat so I wiped it off with toilet paper. I washed my hands right after but I can't help but think I will get somthing now. I need to stress the fact I know that this is a ridiculous scenario! Knowing facts about transmission does not make me feel better. As a nurses aide and student nurse I have carried for patients with all of these diseases. It has never affected my patient care! After when I go home I obese over if I made a mistake and put myself at risk. I know transmission rates after a needle should stick for HIV is less than 1%. This does not stop my fear of casual contact. I am embrassed of these feelings and I need to find away to control them. I can't keep getting tested everytime I freak out.... please help!
-future RN with irrational fears
-future RN with irrational fears
Thank you all for the advice. I am going to try therapy. I got my results back from my 8 pannel test, all negative. I still have this uneasy feeling about the issue. I know it is just matter of time before I freak out again.
Dr. JOnathan Grayson's book Freedom from OCD is excellent and focuses heavily on the learning to live with uncertainty aspect of OCD. Something I struggle with terribly.
Hi Volleyball. What I think you are going through is fear of uncertainty, which is at the heart of OCD. You know the facts about transmission of things like HIV, but you are having trouble accepting that there might be a tiny, very unlikely chance of being infected. People with OCD want 100% certainty, but that just doesn't happen in real life. You need to learn (and believe in) the difference between possibility and PROBABILITY.
Since you are going to be working in the medical field, you need to get this under control. You need to see a therapist who can help you get your OCD under control. With medication or CBT therapy (or both), they can get you to a place where you will stop obsessing and feel much less anxiety.
In the meantime, there are a number of books available about OCD and how to fight it. The one I like is "Brain Lock" by Jeffery Schwartz MD.
With some work on your part, you're going to be ok.
Since you are going to be working in the medical field, you need to get this under control. You need to see a therapist who can help you get your OCD under control. With medication or CBT therapy (or both), they can get you to a place where you will stop obsessing and feel much less anxiety.
In the meantime, there are a number of books available about OCD and how to fight it. The one I like is "Brain Lock" by Jeffery Schwartz MD.
With some work on your part, you're going to be ok.
you should write to nursegirl6572. She's wonderful & laid my fears to rest along with RainLover71. I suffer from OCD & OCD HIV & I can tell you my story if it helps. They helped me get over it.
So, about 1 month ago we fooled around (masturbation - no risk) I gave him a hand job & he came on my hand - that hand was ok. It was the OTHER hand I started flipping out about. I had a day old paper cut on it & the day after the handjob, I found a scrape of the topside thumb. Skin intact, jagged & red, no blood. But here's the kicker, the sperm never touched the hand directly, I touched the hankie that had hand lotion (with alcohol content) & his sperm. I had an anxiety attack, refused to talk to the guy, was ready to go get the PEP from the emergency room. My sister was able to calm me down & get the story out of me. She's not a medical professional & said she was pretty sure the virus dies when it hits the air. She found an HIV forum & specialist & emailed them my story & got a reply. NO RISK AT ALL. I then joined this website & started to read about HIV.
This past week I had a GYN appointment where I had blood testing & yes again, HIV ANXIETY, this posting helped again SO much. I panicked myself into believing the results would come back positive.From what??? I had NO oral, vaginal, or anal sex!!! Logically I know that IF, IF, IF, this guy had something he wasn't aware of, there was NO WAY I could have caught anything by touching that hankie. Two reasons: the virus hit the air & was weakened & no longer infectious AND it was mixed w/the hand lotion that had alcohol content. The alcohol content would have weakened if not killed the virus altogether.
I'm on new meds now that seem to be helping me.
So, about 1 month ago we fooled around (masturbation - no risk) I gave him a hand job & he came on my hand - that hand was ok. It was the OTHER hand I started flipping out about. I had a day old paper cut on it & the day after the handjob, I found a scrape of the topside thumb. Skin intact, jagged & red, no blood. But here's the kicker, the sperm never touched the hand directly, I touched the hankie that had hand lotion (with alcohol content) & his sperm. I had an anxiety attack, refused to talk to the guy, was ready to go get the PEP from the emergency room. My sister was able to calm me down & get the story out of me. She's not a medical professional & said she was pretty sure the virus dies when it hits the air. She found an HIV forum & specialist & emailed them my story & got a reply. NO RISK AT ALL. I then joined this website & started to read about HIV.
This past week I had a GYN appointment where I had blood testing & yes again, HIV ANXIETY, this posting helped again SO much. I panicked myself into believing the results would come back positive.From what??? I had NO oral, vaginal, or anal sex!!! Logically I know that IF, IF, IF, this guy had something he wasn't aware of, there was NO WAY I could have caught anything by touching that hankie. Two reasons: the virus hit the air & was weakened & no longer infectious AND it was mixed w/the hand lotion that had alcohol content. The alcohol content would have weakened if not killed the virus altogether.
I'm on new meds now that seem to be helping me.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Community
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
