Mom has stage 3 oc

[chellesname]

My mom has recently been diagnosed with stage 3c ovarian cancer. They are reccomending 3 rounds of chemo taxol and carboplaxin then surgery. She has already gotten her first round of chemo two weeks ago. She has very very bad mood swings. Does anyone know idf this is normal? They are very bad. She says some horrible things to people. She will not get out of bed. Does anyone have any suggestions?. I am very concerned for her.
Thanks

[chellesname]

Thank you guys so much for your support. Mom has decided that I may not come over there anymore. She wants to be alone. She is out of bed though and doing some normal things, so I am glad to hear this. Hopefully, she will stop being angry with me for trying to helo and focus her anger to get well.

[jolene8106]

Totally agree with Minnie - when I was first diagnosed I fought with almost everyone I could find - the control thing Minnie mentioned is very true.

I too was diagnosed w/3c (June 2004) - did the 3 rounds of carbo/taxol, then surgery, then 3 more rounds.  Some recurrence between then and now, but I am still here!

Try to help your Mom feel more in control - if you can, suggest (GENTLY) that she take an active role in her treatment.  It's difficult to get out of bed (even without chemo side effects) when you are faced with this nasty disease, but I found that by forcing myself to get up, take walks or other exercise (might help w/the constipation as well) - I felt more "normal" and able to deal with the thoughts and many aspects of ovarian cancer in a more rational way.  If you can help your Mom find ways to be extra good to herself (massage, nice walks in the park, favorite foods, friends ...) it might help her to give herself some positive energy.  Antidepressants helped me a great deal.  As Minnie said, it takes some time to get your head around the diagnosis.  Once that happens, I'm hopeful that your Mom will take the "fighting" attitude.

Also, take care of yourself!  If you don't, you won't be able to help your Mom!

Best wishes,

Jolene

[MinnieWM]

There is no normal when you get a cancer diagnosis, and everyone responds differently.  My recommendation to you is to be as supportive as you can, and don't take anything personally.  For some, having a support group can be helpful.  Gilda's Clubs are wonderful resources, and many cancer centers have a network of survivors that they match with those newly diagnosed.

Your mother probably does not feel well physically, but that is probably nothing compared to what is going on inside her head.  She needs to be in control, but isn't in control over her disease; so, she has to have some control over something -- whether it is choosing to take a medication or not.  Don't argue with her -- just be what you are, a concerned daughter.

Do encourage her to talk to her physician about her irritability, and definitely about the constipation.  Her doctor is the one who can be tough if need be, and can refer her for counseling services, and/or perhaps prescribe medication to help get her through this.

You are so sweet to care so much, and you and your mother will get through this.  It just takes some time to get your head wrapped around the diagnosis, and get comfortable with a "new normal".

Keep us updated on how you and your mother are doing.

[chellesname]

Also, she will not take the nausea medicine and hasn't had a bowel movement in 6 days. we have tried everything we know of!