I get so hypervigilant around people in public, when they are behind me. I feel on edge and worried, even though I know inside they are not out to harm me. I know it stems from my mother who would scream/hit me for YEARS and even raise a pan to throw it at me from behind me , threatening me. I still live w/her even as an adult because of the PTSD symptoms I have and how I feel incapable- she would mock me, belittle me, chastise 'every'thing about me for years. She is manic, and can rage and twist anything you said at all to defend yourself, to seem like YOU are attacking her, or YOU are sick. She has said I want 'her to die' and I am ungrateful etc. I just don't want to feel so low anymore like I'm less than others, or like I can't handle life... I want my own apartment yet have anxiety, and I'm just coming out of the 'fog' she has put me under.. I just wish I could feel at ease in public and not fear others that they are like her :/