Coming to grips with this Disorder

[braddels]

Hi I am new to this forum.  I am 39 yr old Male who has finally been diagnosed with complex PTSD relating to his service in the Royal Australian NAvy during the post 1991 Gulf War.

[braddels]

Still waiting to hear when i will be admitted to hospital for the PTSD inpatient program.  Thiings are getting to me at the moment as I am getting a little bit angrier and depressed.  i spent most of last weeek in bed unable to drag myself out of it as the world didn't look like a nice place to be in.  I am incontrol of my suicidal thoughts and this is taking its toll on me - making me very tired both mentally and physicallly but it will not let them overtake my thinking.  i have been short with Sam the past few days and we have been arguing a bit mostly over my lask of compassion towards her as she has her problems as well - I am only thinking of me and my problems (narsistic behaviours).

[braddels]

Thank you for your kind words and support I gathered that you meant peace when I read your post

[Midnight101]

I meant that I hope you can be at peace with yourself.
Ha I spelled peace (peach)

[Midnight101]

I am so sorry that you are going through a rough time. You are in my thoughts. I have been diagnosed with this disorder due to past issues of abuse. You can read my story - its pathetic. I am going through hell. If there is anything that you can tell me that you have learned in your classes I would really appreciate it. Each day for me is such a struggle with my own emotions.
I know for me its baby steps all the way.  I am suffering from night tremors where I wake up and I am being attacked by my ex with an axe (this really happened). There are days when I am so afraid to go to sleep.
I go through periods where I think I am getting better then I dont feel like getting out of bed because I am so exhausted.
I really hope that one day you can be at peach with what all you have been through.

Take care

[margypops]

Good luck in the hospital will you get use of a PC there or allowed your lap top, it would be good to hear how you are doing,your wife could have been right I know when I felt worse it was after I had had a good time, which was kind of a contradiction, sometimes you can exhaust your self.I have heard Australia has a good record on helping Vets, hasnt been that way here I am afraid . Good luck, feel better soon

[braddels]

Today is what i call a depression session i stayed in bed most of teh day as it was the safest place for me.  I don't know why it happened today but it did My wife thinks it is due to having a big weekend and very luittle sleep also I am trybibng very hard to not get angry alll the time over the small stuff.  I am still waiting for admission to hospital.  The hospital where i am going is called St John of God and they have a ward dedicated to PTSD Patients.  a lot of this has come about thanks to those guys who serve3d in vietnam.  Over here in Australia they have a very powerful voice and it gets heard at the very highest level; in goverment.  i am glad that i ahve got those veterans to help me through the tough times when medications don't seem to work and teh little voices in my head try to take control.  Thank you for you comments and support