Any new mommies with 2nd time fathers?

[Noahs_mommy14]

I'm a first time mom and my fiance already has a son. I love the kid to death but I just want all his attention and I'm going to want my son to have all the attention.  I know it's wrong but I initially didn't want to ever be someone's (second) but now that I am I just want it to be about me. I'm even thinking of moving to California with my f soon to be husband just so I can have my family. It's not the kid that's the problem I just don't want his mom to interfere with my new family.

[diabetusbiscuit]

My husb has a 3yo already and we get along really well, i dont really feel a conection with her though i do love her. Her mom and i have some major issues which is why i think ive failed at a connection, telling me we could never be as close as they were bc of their child and she will always be his first, she wastrying to break us up amd still does at times. Hes very reassuring in that she wont that his first was an accident but we actually wanted a family together and got one. It is very difficult at times with his daughter bc of her mom but im the adult and she has done nothing, but i always have to think about him and his bond with her. Even if we seperated i wouldnt want him to let someone get in the way of his relationship with our son. I wouldnt want my stepmom to take my dad away, shes tried hard to create a bond with us so im tdying to follow her footsteps and just work through the tough times.
And to go off of what shannon said is that part is really upsetting too, but he doesnt make it seem like anything new.like im so insecure about everything yet he knows how it will/should be, even though every pregnancy is different he was in the class in hs so they gave an array of possibilities.
You can ignore everything i just wrote, im jist really emotional and dont have anyone to talk to..

[xxXxshannon23xx]

Im a second time mommy with a first time daddy and I know my fiancé does get jealous sometimes  but not of my son or his dad but of the fact that ive already been through this once but then I remind him, this pregnancy is completely 100% different than my last one that was 4 and a half years ago. So maybe thats why you get jealous,  the fact that hes already gone through all of it but I can promise you that going through it with you is most likely nothing like it was with her. So yes he might split his time with you and his other child but just remember he still loves you plans to marry you and soon you'll have this baby that will also take his attention so if you wouldnt want him to take away his attention fron your baby dont ask him to take it away from his first baby.

[Noahs_mommy14]

You guys are right and FYI ladies he and I were discussing moving long before I became pregnant. My job prospects are out there and it's a nice place to raise my son. I have no problem sharing because I love his son but that mother wants to control my household as well as hers and I will not allow that to happen. So if that makes me selfish than hey, I'm selfish.

[BabyandChey]

Hola. My boyfriend has a son whom will be 2 on the 22. Hes the cutest. Except the mom is a psycho b•itch and yeah. Its a long story. But little Elijah was put up for adoption. It breaks my heart seeing Brandon cry all the time over him. But this summer he will be coming to visit. Brandon is SO exited, he hasnt seen him since he was 3 months because his adoptive family lives in Arizona. Im so exited to meet the little guy and exited for my daughter to meet her big brother, though she'll still be in my stomach. Still. :) Its hard being with a guy who has a child. It makes you feel all different things. But I love Brandon and I love his little boy already.

[esorelleinad]

My boyfriend has a 7 year old daughter who doesn't live with him and I'm always encouraging him to see her more as I don't want her getting jealous of her little brother and such. I have a bond with his daughter and I will never be her mother but I will never treat her any differently to how I'll treat my son.

[Lissa11414]

Amen 2 that! I would love his son as if he were my own as well.

[sunshineshowers118]

My husband has a 4 year old littke girl. We are expecting our first child in December. I woukd never in a million years expect his full attention to be in me nor our child. It should be equal and you knew what you were walking into. I would think you would live for your soon to be hubby to love all of you the same. To be honest I hope he would leave you before you  rip him away from what was his before you came along. I love my step daughter as if she came out of me.

[Lissa11414]

I am with a guy who has a 3 yr old with another girl who even has the same name as me n drives the same car! & I don't feel that way! I mean yea I get jealous sometimes but I don't tell him that bcus I don't want him to feel torn between his first born and our baby on the way. He's a wonderful father that I know will be amazing to my baby bcus I got to see how he was with his son. He doesn't hang out with the mother or talk to her about anything but his son and when he goes to see him he takes me along ..personally I think that's the best I could ask for in a situation like ours ...to be included. And not only that but these ladies are right you are being kind of selfish bcus what if it were you that was the FIRST mother of his child and your child was attached to his father and then his new girl wanted to take him away from your baby for her own personal gain? U wouldn't like it then. U need to put urself in that child's shoes your trying to take his FATHER away from him. .that will be pretty damaging and that's very unfair and heartless kind of too. Breaking an innocent child's heart like that is just not cool. And you could even lose your fiance over it if he sees your acting that way and not even considering his first born child. Sorry if your not liking what I'm saying..I'm just being honest bcus I'm in your shoes as well and I'm thankful plus he lives with me spends all his time besides work with me and is so excited for this baby to come and that's everything I can ask for. Good luck 2 u.

[allisonn23]

This is sad. Would you want him to leave your baby just because the babys mother wants all his attention? no right its not the childs fault. And his kids should be put first over any women.

[Hensons]

You shouldn't even want a man who's willing to up and leave his child and start over. It's the first child who is sharing.

[asmith21488]

Smh

[jasmean]

You can't be like that because a real father will leave you over his kid because that's selfish and hes a kid hes sharing his daddy with you guys because he was there first so just think about it in that way!