Weird thing to worry about?

[AuziNikol]

Is it weird that i worry about how intelligant my son will be? I kinda feel bad about it, and i mean i will love him either way. But i have a high IQ level and his "sperm donor" is not really to bright. Theres not much known about what actually causes someone to be smart or not. Some theories say its genetic, some say its based on how a person was raised. Again i feel really bad that i actually think about this, and will love him no matter what. As long as he's happy and healthy i will be happy.

[AuziNikol]

Yeah i plan on taking him to events and play groups and story times they have at the library. I also love going to museums and nature centers so i plan on taking him to places like that. Im hoping he will enjoy them like i do, because i dont want to force anything on him, but i dont want him to become a mindless drone that just watches tv or plays video games all the time like a lot of kids do today. I also live in a city right now with my grandma but plan on moving back to my small hometown before he reaches school age

[wyattsmom2015]

I went through the same thing. I am not the MOST intelligent person but I am intelligent. As a nurse and mother I have so far been successful and wonder how I got stuck with my husband. He is not the brightest person and that is putting it nicely. I made the choice to have children with him and that has me thinking about if my children will be pretty and intelligent.

I have found that the way you raise your children does not have as much influence on intelligence as genetics. I raise all my children the same and spend the same amount of time with them. Some of my girls have showed signs of being very slow, once they pick it up They are ok but it takes a while for them to get it. The others are very intelligent and are well ahead of others their age. I am proud of them all because they work so hard to do well. The bad thing is my husband only wants to brag on the ones that are the most intelligent, when the others are the ones who take after him. I told him he should talk about them equally because no matter how intelligent they seem they all work very hard to do well and learn new things.

If you think your child is having a hard time just take it slow and spend more time with them. They will eventually get it and you will be very proud.

[ashrefra]

Kids are going to succeed in other areas and sometimes others are not so important. Like my son is 2 1/2 he's been climbing before he could walk and has been going ever since. He is more advanced in the act of physically doing and how things work mechanically. He's fearless been kind of the playground, climbing ladders and rock walls all by himself before 2. Always putting together puzzles and attempting to fix things and see how it all fits together. On the other hand verbal communication was on the back burner because he was so focused on doing he didn't have a need to say it. He knows what he wants and he knows how to get his point across without words. He's now just really getting his vocabulary rolling. He has always said words occasionally and a phrase here and there but nothing extremely advanced. This is now just becoming important to him.

I guess what I am getting at is you have to see what your child is advancing in and be proud of that, they're not going to be " good" at everything. Just taking the time to show and teach your child makes a world a difference. Him just watching you and your words and actions is going to reflect on him. Keep up the good work, it's going to show. Sometimes later than sooner but, it's there. (:

[RockRose]

I agree with SM,  and I actually think there's a LOT that is known about what causes a person to be smart.

Aside from outside forces like lack of oxygen in utero or at birth,  and getting  appropriate nutrition in early childhood,  it's nature and nurture that causes intelligence.

Allowing and encouraging imaginative play and imaginative conversations is critical.  Reading stories with substance is also critical.  As fun as Brown Bear Brown Bear and Goodnight Moon are,  those are soda pop.  A preschooler should be able to sit and pay attention for more than the 3 minutes it takes to read those books,  and they are comforting sing songs but they're not stories.   If you go to the bookstore you can get a collection of classic children's stories with rich and colorful illustrations that will help them imagine the stories.

[GSYoung]

I think about that all the time, my hubby and I are both pretty intelligent and being smart is a big part of both of our families, it's very important to our families how smart or quick to pick up on things we are.

@specialmom is right all you need to do is actually pay attention to your child spend time with him, present him with new ideas and challenges often read to him etc..

[specialmom]

Hi, no.  I think that is natural to think about those things.  You chose a partner that isn't as intelligent as you and know your baby is going to be part of you and him.  You know from your own life that having intelligence is so critical in life and want that for you son.  I think that we just do the best we can and love our kids regardless and I'm sure you will.  One thing that factors into life is born IQ but another big factor to a child's success is the kind of home you provide.  Stimulating them with thinking, engaging with them regularly (no tv baby sitting),  a life with culture in it, new experiences, take the things you like and teach it to your child.  Read to them often, go to museums, create a home where acquiring knowledge and using one's brain is praised and appreciated.  Honestly, when you work with your kids like this in the preschool years, they are at an advantage because so many parents aren't that way.  You can tell the difference in children exposed to these things verses those who are not.  

So, create that kind of lifestyle for your child and then know that our intelligence will be part of him as well and I'm sure your baby will grow into a great child!  good luck