How do I get through this alone ?

[Godschild143]

I'm 20 years old. I just found out I was pregnant about a week & a half ago (I'm 5 weeks now). Me and my (now ex) boyfriend were together for almost a year and a half having unprotected sex, I never took birth control,we basically did nothing to avoid me getting pregnant. He already has a 3 year old son from a previous relationship but he rarely gets to see him because of the child's mother not accepting that he was in another serious relationship. She basically used his son to control him, the only thing is, no one in his family & not even he is sure that his son is actually his so he never signed the birth cert & she never wanted to take a DNA test, always avoided it (it's a long story). Anyways, so our relationship has been going south these past few months because of his pathological lying problem. But we've both tried to keep the love alive and work on our individual flaws, but it just never worked. But the one thing that did work, is we both loved having sex with each other. He's in the construction business and was assigned to go to Mississippi (he left this past Sunday) for 6-9 months. Before he left I told him, and he tells me to get an abortion, it's not his, had an attitude because I refuse to get an abortion. So we haven't talked to each other since last Tuesday. Because he refuses to talk to me...although I understand it's going to be hard taking care of a child, I'm not going to run away from my problems again (I've had 2 abortions, told myself I wouldn't get a 3rd). I'm not working at the moment but ACTIVELY looking for a job, I don't have a car (never did) & have no money saved. I have so much faith that God is going to steer me in the right direction. He will never give me more than what I can take. This is a blessing and I can't wait foe my future to unfold. My family isn't speaking to me (only my dad, my aunts sorta talking to me) I'm currently living with my exes sister but this isn't going well because all she does is complain, but she's the one that told me to move in with her (I was living at his moms with him before he left) but coming here was the biggest mistake of my life. She's going to stress me out with all of her nagging, she doesn't buy food so 9/10 I'm starving. I can't do this and I feel so alone but abortion/adoption is not in my vocab but I need to get out of this house and away from the stress. I'm just so bummed that he turned his back on me when I needed him the most </3

[darthmander]

There are programs that can help a single mom. They find you a place to live and help you find a job. Keep your head up.

[Katielou92]

I'm totally in the same position.  Except me and my ex were trying well he was pretty much controlling me to get pregnant but he left when I was 12 weeks. Every now an again he comes back to me but then leaves again. Im not working either and I have fallen out with my family.  But I have my friends and im getting on with my life. You don't need anyone just you and your beautiful baby. Keep your chin up and you will get help financially and people will soon come to terms with it all. This is the beginning of a very beautiful future for you and your baby nothing else matters :) when you feel your little one wriggle in your belly it makes everything negative dissappear. Your baby really is a little miracle and im sure you will love every minute of being a mum. Don't let anything stress you out it really isnt worth it haters will hate. The last thing you need is stress so turn a blind eye to it all and ignore it. Get yourself a nice little home I live in the uk so I dont know what help you can get in america but im sure there is help out there for you. Good luck x

[brendylove]

Ladies i think we should help our friend here and maybe try to donate a least $10 so she can start saving for the mean time and buy herself some food for her and the baby! :)) ill be glad to help

But don't worry have patience and keep your faith I know god won't leave you alone especially now:)

[mslovelyvon]

this is my first also and I'm nine weeks and going through the same thing kind of realizing that I'm going to be a single parent! And for awhile all I could do is think this is not how I pictured things to be.......but more as time goes on I know it's his lost and I know I can cause god wouldn't put more on me then I can  bare. just try to relax I know its easier said then done but think about all the positive things.....you will have someone to love you unconditionally and no one can ever take that away.....try not to stress about things I know I have had two miscarriages in the past so this time around trying to do everything right

[Godschild143]

Thanks ladies. It's just really taking a toll on my mind & heart. I'm trying to stay positive and not give up on myself but it's so hard with everyone pressuring me about what I need to do. I know what I need to do & I will do whatever it takes to support my child. Hopefully he comes around & stops acting like a little kid & be a man (he's a mamas boy, was never taught how to be a man)....I just hopes he grows out of his phase. It wouldn't been nice to have him on board and have a legit game plan for 3....but everything is in Gods hands at this point...& I've looked at a few shelters, I'm going to call some up tomorrow when I get up.

[kaitymomma2013]

First thing I would do is apply for food stamps or look into a womens shelter. They will help you find a job, help you find a place and get you to apply for anything they can think of that will help you get on your feet. Just remember don't feel down on yourself. Its a hand up not a hand out. Its the best advice I can give you. I'm sorry he wasn't man enough to step up and be there for you.

[1st_time_momma]

Hun at first when I learned I was pregnant with my daughter right now my husband wanted me to get an abortion.. We were having really hard times constantly fighting n some infidelity issues (not me ) and in between jobs and me only working part time. But he has come around and is excited to have another babygirl on the way (he has 3 boys with a previous relationship and she does the same thing with them usues them against him cuz he's with me) fricking pathetic. But the point is if at one point he cared then he'll come around to ur pregnancy. My husband has even came to my us a couple weeks ago :) anything is possible just have faith :)

[mrsreeder2be]

Keep your head up. I know its hard, and being a single Mom will be the hardest thing you will do ...BUT its the most rewarding thing ever. Go find a job, worry about taking small steps at a time. I was a single Mom for over 3 years... its not easy but you can do it!!! You don't need a man to raise a baby, I promise :)