Why is it ok to be rude to pregnant mommies?

[cgoodwin]

I am so sick of people saying "are you sure you are pregnant?" tomorrow I am 23 weeks, and I'm stillunder 100lbs. All people say is "where are you hiding him?" when I tell people at the baby store my due date, they say "oh, you're adopting?" I know most mommas woul live to still be small this far along, but knowing that I only look this way because my little boy is small and sick makes every comment feel like a knife! I've been told that I need to eat more, because I must be depriving him of nutrients. Saying things like that only make a worried momma even more upset. I didn't  ask for their advice, I didnt say "hey, what do you think of me being almost six months pregnant?" and my own family is the worst. I have two cousins, one is not quite 3 months and showing, and the other is four ad showing. My mom is always telling me that I need to stop sucking it in. I wish I could show, but there is nothing there! Sorry about the rant. I guess I'm just feeling especially frustrated todaya

[fLoWeRcHiLd007]

That does seem really rude. Some people don't even realize the stupid things they say. But your family should know your situation and not be saying things like that. Have you told them about the baby being sick? If not maybe you should so they can understand why and how it hurts you so bad. I'm sorry you're in this situation. If it was me, I'd probably be a really big b back at them and it wouldn't go well. So good for you on not loosing your cool. But maybe you need too =\  but stay strong and good luck mama!!!

[cgoodwin]

I know I'm being oversensitive about it, and I need to let it go. My family all knows about the problems I've had. They know I'm high risk, and how worried I am. They just don't understand how scary it is

[fLoWeRcHiLd007]

I don't think you're being over sensitive at all. Pregnancy alone is scary. Let alone having problems that need high risk attention.

[babyboy111]

cgoodwin u said u were sick? is there something wrong with your baby??

[cgoodwin]

He is dangerously underweight and there have been alot of complications from a previous condition I have. I went through 5 years of chemotherapy treatment, and because of that and a few other factors, I've been told that this will have to be my last pregnancy. I'm so scared for my little boy, because he is the first of my baby boys to make it this far. I have a daughter who is one now.

[babyboy111]

u mind e asking what complications and condition? how many miscarriages have u had?? seems serious?

[babyboy111]

ur have a 1 year old daughter and ur 6 months pregnant cute so close together:) is ur little girl healthy??

[cgoodwin]

I have an immune disease and I've had preterm labor twice now. My daughter was born early, and small, but is a very heathy little girl. She's my sweetheart, my whole reason for pushing on. I've lost two little boys before, one at 12 weeks and one at 18. I don't think I could survive losing another, especially not after becoming sobinvested in him. And on top of everything, we've decided to name him after my grandfather, who is suffering Alzheimer's and his health is declining quickly. That man has been a huge role model to me, and I know it's stupid, but I have this dumb superstitious belief that if his namesake can be born healthy, than may e he will regain some of his health. I know it's ridiculous.

[babyboy111]

how much underweight is he? and how small was ur daughter?

[MichaelaSue]

You're pregnant, they need to stop saying these things to you period . It is rude and I hope your little boy comes out perfectly healthy! I'm 23 weeks and 2 days and I barely have a bump, I'm also having a boy. And as far as I know he's forming right so maybe your boy will come out perfectly fine (:

[cgoodwin]

MichaelaSue, that is so reassuring to hear! At my last ultrasound, which was at 19 weeks, he was measuring at 13 weeks, but was developing well. My daughter was just under four lbs when she was born, and is still small now at 21 lbs. But she is walking and running, can say several words and a few short sentances, and just might be Houdini reincarnated lol! I've never seen a one year old escape so well.

[missymay34]

My daughter was born at 4lbs 11ozs full term and I just had my son 5 days ago he was 5lbs 5ozs. Both were healthy just tiny. My daughter just turned 2 and is only 24lbs now. I know how you feel as I never showed either of my pregnancies as well. I got to hear how I was starving my babies too and hiding them. One day I got pissed and went off on everyone. I was hypersensitive too and would cry about it too.

[cgoodwin]

I just dont understand why, as soon as I say I am pregnant, it automatically makes it ok for them to say whatever they are thinking. I suppose I should be grateful. While pregnant with my daughter, everyone felt the need totell me what a huge mistake I was making because I looked like I was 15 and pregnant.

[febmama2013]

Didn't start showing until 30 weeks and even then I just looked fat. I poped around 34-35 weeks! Doctors thought they had the wrong paitent. As longs as your doing everything you can possibly do then your giving bubs the best start! Don't stress!

[kelly032913]

I didn't start showing until 31ish weeks! My on sent me to a doctor and they didn't believe I was even prego and I was 26weeks! They did a pee test cause thought I was lieing about it! The doctor couldn't figure out why I wasn't gaining or showing. My boy is alittle on the small side (29th %) but doctors say he is perfectly healthy. Just give it time, once you get farther you'll "pop". :) good luck girl! Don't ever let rude dumbies get you down!

[luxejess93]

I'll be 25 weeks wednesday and have only gained 6 pounds. My husband's family has said some pretty rude comments to me as well. This is my first pregnancy and I have been sick pretty much all the time and it's been hard for me to keep food down or eat much, but I have taken my vitamin everyday and the doctor has never said that anything looks wrong with my little boy. I'm sorry you've been sick most of your life :( I hope you get to feeling better soon.

[cgoodwin]

Thanks lyxejess :) I was doing really good up until this pregnancy. This is the first I've been sick in years. I was in the hospital three times for dehydration during my first trimester, and I didn't even tell anyone but my husband about the baby until 13 weeks. I know this is a silly thing to get upset about. Some days things like this just push you over the edge, you know? I know that eventually, I will pop, and it's just going to take some time. I'm pretty sure my little guy is finally growing, because I've been feeling him kick and move a lot lately! It's so exciting to feel and know he is alive in there!

[luxejess93]

I only was in once for dehydration for throwing up so much. After that, they gave me zofran for nausea and haven't thrown up near as much. My husband's aunt accused me of not taking care of myself saying that he malnourished and all this and that when she doesn't know how hard this pregnancy has been on me. Just because it never was for her, doesn't mean it's that easy for everyone else. My baby boy doesn't like kicking either lol makes me worry so much, but doctor has never said anything bad about his health so I assume he is doing well. Good luck to you and your little one! :)

[jen_ortiz]

Thats why u have hormones u can tell the ***** off n ain't nobody guna say a word to u !!!! See me I don't take **** from nobody anyways

[lousil]

Try not to let them get to you. I hope and pray everything goes well. My mom didnt gain or show any with me until she was 6 months. Just try not to worry.

[cgoodwin]

Thanks everyone. I love that I have somewhere to come and vent and get reassurance from others. I have an ultrasound tomorrow to see how baby is growing, and my bloodwork should be back from the lab. With all the worry this little guy has got me going through, I just feel liketge last thing I need is people pointing out how small I am and how small he must be. But I know he's gonna grow big and strong!