What Next?

[DC8957]

I am 45, and my wife is 40,  She had a historectomy 10 years ago.  We have struggled with her sex drive even before her historectomy,,, after children,,, at one time she consulted her physician about it, and they tried testosterone cream.  She wouldn't use it regularly and declared it ineffective.   Later her Dr. tried Testosterone shots which were straight from God.  She was ravenous, those few short months were fantastic, both in desire and response,, however two things, an internal tension, aggressive feelings, (i know about those, live with it every day), and hair growth.  During this same time, she was getting laser therapy for bikini line, lips, underarm hair removal, and the shots were counterproductive.  I pleaded for her to just cut the dose, anything to keep some compatibility.  To no avail, she ceased the testerone shots and we are just incompatible.  All this being said, is there another medical option that we might have with fewer side affects?  I am desperate, and desire sex two times a week or more.  The current "obligatory" sex once or twice a month is killing our relationship.  Thank you in advance for your thoughts.  DC


This discussion is related to Lack of Desire.

[lovemykids465]

There is a diet called the orgasm diet that is suppose to help with sex drive. It list a bunch of foods and natural things you can do to increase your drive. I had a hysterectomy 6 years ago. Sometimes even a little change in her hrt can help. But I know when my husband shows empathy and helps me with the little things like dishes and taking care of the kids it is a big turn on. Try it if you haven't already it may work.

[mommyof2girls9n7]

This is regarding the pre- hysterectomy problems. I am 33, and already have no desire for sex. Idk about ur wife, but I can tell you my biggest problem is not that I don't love him, or that I would cheat, or that he doesn't turn me on, or make me feel good. I would just rather go to sleep. I am so tired all of the time, and it honestly just requires more energy than I feel willing to give to him, when I will need it tomorrow for work, kids, etc..... Even post hysterectomy, I believe this could still be an issue. Maybe she's just too darn worn out??

[jo929]

my hysterectomy was given when i was 32 i took zestee for about 2 years, i do not have anyidea why they gave it to me also i remember 2 of my neighbors that had the same operation and one had 7 children the dr told her he took the baby pen out and left the play pen she just laughed and said now i will not have to worry about feeding any more mouths and she did not take anything the other neighbor told me she felt she was half a women because she could not have children anymore is the reason that i mentioned the psychiatrist my daughter had to have a hysterectomy at age 20 due to an infection from an iud and she never took anything and she had sex and it did not bother her. so really i do not know, but i remembered you said your wife had a problem before the operation but i do know the male hormones help and yes it can make the hair grow where it is not wanted i knew someon that had those shots and they do work  luck  jo

[DC8957]

Thanks, Jo, I appreciate the information, I'll read up on it and see what we can do.  dc

[jo929]

I know that there are other things that can be given i myself had a hysterectomy many yera s ago and i was given a pill called zestee, it is sort of a male homone, i took it for years and it helped i also know other women that did not take anything and the operation did not bother them maybe it is psycological  luck  jo

[DC8957]

No, that hasn't been offered,,, she is on syntroid and premarin.  DC8957

thanks,

[SeriousSam]

Has she tried a hormone patch?