Thank you everyone who commented i will see what happens after this!
You have been together for a while. That says something. However, he does seem to be unsure about your future by the way he's acting. Complications with children and an ex can sometimes come between you and unfortunately it seems to be the case now. Communication is very important in any relationship. It seems like you must set some boundries and rules. Ask him if he sees a future for the both of you. If he says yes then sit down and draw out a plan. Tell him how you feel about his relationship with his ex-wife. What is acceptable and what is not. What time is available for being together since you are both going to school, etc. Try to develope an understanding about each others needs and desires. Since this is your first time in love and in a relationship maybe you could talk to your Mother, sister or another woman who has more experience. You are not being clingy or needy. You have legitamite concerns. You are uncertain and feel insecure in your relationship because of the way he is acting. He needs to be honest with you and tell you how he feels, You must be willing to hear the truth even if it's not what you want to hear. Even if it hurts. You must be able to allow him his freedom of choice. To love unconditionally means to accept the other person for what they feel and not try to change them. You must let them be free to choose. Then you are free to choose what is best for you. If he cannot love you or give you what you need, you must let him go. If the love is true, he will come back. Trust the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understandings. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight...God is love...
I agree with brice1967. Sorry but you are the only one in this relationship and you need to find someone who loves you more than you love him.
Hi. I have been where you are and quite frankly it hurts. It hurts bad. I agree with "brice" comments. Allow this to be a learning experience and begin to focus more on you. Taking time for yourself will really help the healing process from the damage done from this relationship. All the best to you.
It's unfortunate that you are going through this. It doesn't seem real fair, does it? Well, you've asked for some advice and I am going to offer you some. I am not trying to upset you, but I am going to be perhaps a bit blunt.
You mentioned that he said that you are "needy". It sounds like perhaps you are a bit needy. What you'd like to have happen is have a boyfriend that is straight forward with you. Clearly you aren't getting that. In my opinion, that does not make you needy at all, but that is how he perceives it. That's unfortunate.
Secondly, it really sounds like you are the one trying here. Relationships are, or at least should be built on trust, respect, mutual admiration, etc. One of the critical elements of a relationship is communication. Although it looks as if you are trying to communicate, he isn't hearing it. Part of communication is hearing.... not just listening, but hearing. From the looks of things, he just doesn't seem to be that interested or would like to have you around as a matter of convenience. For a lack of a better word, that *****!
As much as it may sting right now, I'd start creating a bit of distance... start letting go. While doing this, concentrate on all things you. (The relationship was good, now not so good) Do things for you. It does sound as if your self esteem has been damaged, and from your description of events, I can see how. I'm not saying throw yourself back on the market, but get wrapped up in school or start hanging with friends again.
You do not need a man in your life who is going to treat you this way. You need to realize that you are worthy of a great relationship, and you should not settle for anything less. If it takes a while to find that, good. Be choosey, be picky. This is your life and you should have full control over whom you share it with. WE are only here once... you have to make this one count. Chalk this relationship up as a learning experience...
Just relax, be you, and don't be desperate or even seem desperate. You can always request a sit down with him. Tell him exactly how you feel, explain your frustration, and be prepared for him to say anything. Making distance now will make a face to face meeting easier for acceptance. Look at the relationship now and accept it as it is.... move forward.
Your doing everything you can to make the relationship work and he,s not.Also its tough when he,s had another relationship and has had children with this woman means she is always going to be in the picture and she doesn,t sound very nice.You on the other hand have made every attempt to embrace the children and be nice to her.If your boyfriend really loves you he needs to make time for you and make a committment to you.Obviously that,s just not happening.If someone really wants to be with you they will move mountains to make it happen.All the best