saying she's pregnant but i think she's lying

[wcc963]

I supposedly got this girl that i was with for a very short time pregnant back in January according to her. I'm 22 and she's 21. She said she didn't want it and had already scheduled an abortion for the following week. We were on good terms then and we were communicating through text during the week and the process of the abortion because I couldn't be in attendance. She told me how she was feeling like crap and bleeding out cause of the pills she was given. She then mentioned that she had the Nuvaring put in, which through my research they will not put in if the woman is pregnant so I don't know if she lied to me about all that.

some background on her, all of this comes from talking to her over the past 3 months or so. she is 21, has a 2yo son that she had from a marriage when she was 18. she was dating a guy at her work about a year ago but only for about a month according to her, but they continued to fool around for a long time after that. she got pregnant from him and had an abortion. but is still in contact with him and spends a lot of time with him. she says she has slept with 25 guys in her life

We had a fight the other day, i called her some colorful names and she all of a sudden brought it up saying she never got the abortion and is still pregnant and claims its mine. When I asked her to get a paternity test to prove that the child is mine she refused, and has continued to refuse. she would be 9 weeks along now. She is telling me she doesn’t want me in her life at all and barely answers my questions through text. I have talked to my mother and a few close friends who know her as well, they all think she's lying. I have save our most recent texting session, nothing before that though :/

if you need/want any extra info or clarity please let me know

[wcc963]

well the night we had the fight she threatened me by saying "they'll be calling you in 7mo for child support" yet she said no when i said i want a paternity test. its really starting ti sink in that she's just flat out lying. but i also thought that she might do this, establish paternity and im out child support. but i don't think already being a single parent that she or her support network wants her to have 2 more kids

[dragonqueen1]

What great advice here on this site, I hope it helps you. My heart breaks for you that you are tearing yourself up over this. I can understand your point, but on the other hand, you got to let this go for now... This is out of your control right now and for you to worry about something that you can't control is useless energy. This girl is not normal to do this to someone. She knows you are hurting and worried and she is loving it, and that is sick. This type of girl is very common today and very sad, I feel sorry for her 2 year old, I hope she's a good mom with that much evil in her veins. Anyway, please please please get some sleep and relax and you will soon know the truth that we all have been telling you.... she's NOT pregnant and if she is IT'S NOT YOURS!!! :)   Good luck I know it will all work out for you.

[specialmom]

If she is pregnant and establishes paternity, you can't walk away from it.  I'm suggesting you don't worry about it until then.  And that happens at the end of pregnancy if there is a pregnancy.

anyway, you are putting yourself in the position to be fooled.  Wait and see what happens and deal with it then.  I'm guessing that no baby is involved.  good luck

[wcc963]

yea I understand that its a little gross... maybe a lot. but like i said before its hard for me to just move on from something that if she isn't lying will affect me for the rest of my life. im sorry but i cant just forget and move on from something like that... i fell much better about it than I did yesterday and most of it is from everyone on here who has taken time to read and respond to my problem. I haven't said it before but THANK YOU, THANK ALL OF YOU :)

she probably wouldn't even talk to me right now let alone come over or let me come over to take a pregnancy test. so that's not an option right now :/

i keep telling myself shes lying but part of me will believe shes not until i know the truth. its just the way i am :(

[specialmom]

Well, pregnancy is one of those things that has a definate end.  I'd tell her that she can come to your house or you her's and she can take a pregnancy test in front of you.  If she refuses, then tell her that you'll talk to her in 9 months when she'll legally have to establish paternity.  

Move on and leave her alone.  Don't feed the BS.  time will tell and it is very doubtful that she is still pregnant.

PS:  Gross man, blowing up a used condom?  Yuck.  

[wcc963]

yea when i asked for the paternity test she said no, i never asked to go to the doctor with her to prove she was still pregnant but im 100% sure she'd say no to that too.

and yes i have learned A LOT from all this, and will be making sure that im much more careful in my future relationships.