My answer is rather lengthy because I see you have asked many questions on other posts. I'm trying to answer all of your questions in one spot.
My recommendations are to enjoy intercourse with someone who respects your body, is willing to take it slow, and with whom you can easily communicate. Out of respect to you and your body, any partner should listen to your feedback and be willing to work on sexual intimacy. If it hurts, ask him to stop. You can try more foreplay or change positions to see if that helps. Until you are comfortable with your body and able to communicate your needs, please be careful.
Pain during intercourse can be caused from lack of lubrication. Menopause has a gradual onset. Perimenopause (the transition to menopause occurring up to 10 years prior to menopause itself) usually begins in the 40s. One of the symptoms of perimenopause is vaginal dryness. Also, lack of foreplay can be a factor. No matter what the cause, vaginal dryness can be extremely uncomfortable. It can lead to itching, burning, and painful intercourse that includes bleeding.
The medical term for painful intercourse is dyspareunia, defined as persistent or recurrent genital pain that occurs just before, during or after intercourse. I would encourage you to talk openly to your gynecologist. Treatments focus on the cause, and can help eliminate or lessen this common problem.
Since you have discussed your hymen in other posts, here is information regarding the widely misunderstood hymen.
For reasons that remain unclear, female babies are born with membranes surrounding their vaginal openings. Most hymens are doughnut shaped and open in the center. Newborns' hymens tend to be prominent and thick. But as the years pass, most hymenal tissue thins and the opening widens. During childhood most hymenal tissue wears away as a result of washing, walking, athletics, self-exploration, and masturbation, though little bits may remain around the vaginal opening, particularly in the area closest to the anus (hymenal tags).
The intact hymen almost never covers the entire vagina. If it did, virgin girls could not menstruate. However, the opening may not look like a doughnut hole. In some women, it has a ladder-like appearance with bands of tissue extending from one side to the other. In others, it resembles a honeycomb with multiple small openings. And in rare cases, an estimated one in 200, the hymen's single opening is so small that fingers, tampons, and erections may not be able to enter comfortably or at all (imperforate hymen). For women with imperforate hymens, a simple surgical procedure snips away the excess tissue. But in most women, by adolescence, any remaining hymenal tissue offers no significant impediment to using tampons or enjoying pain-free intercourse.
If hymenal tissue has largely worn away by adolescence, why do so many women experience pain on first intercourse? The sexological literature is oddly quiet on this issue. But I have a few ideas:
Pain on intercourse is a fairly common gynecological problem. It may be caused by many conditions. Some pain on first intercourse may have to do with medical issues.
Because of the mythology surrounding the hymen, many (most?) women expect first intercourse to hurt, which may become a self-fulfilling prophecy. The expectation of pain causes anxiety, which can turn minor discomfort into pain.
According to the National Health and Social Life Survey (1994), about one-third of women recall not wanting sex their first time or recall being forced into it during incest, sexual assault, or other coercion or exploitation. Exploitive or assaultive sex can cause tremendous anxiety and produce or aggravate pain.
Even when women fully consent to first intercourse, an estimated "75 percent feel unprepared and find their initial sexual experience distasteful," according to the late sex therapist Sandra Leiblum, Ph.D. "Young Romeos, even those who care deeply about their girlfriends, typically lack the sexual skill and finesse for enjoyable intercourse." Fearful that women may change their minds, young men often rush into intercourse before women feel emotionally ready for it, and before their vaginas have become sufficiently relaxed and receptive for pain-free intercourse. Once erections enter young women, the men they're attached to often imitate the pounding, piston-like action of pornography. Such mechanical, non-sensual sex can also cause pain.
Even if first intercourse is totally consensual and loving, sweet, and sensual, natural anxiety around their first time may interfere with women's release of vaginal lubrication. Poorly lubricated intercourse also contributes to painful intercourse.
Residual hymenal tissue may also contribute to discomfort or pain, but for the vast majority of women, hymen issues play a minor, if any role in pain on first intercourse (unless the woman has an imperforate hymen that has not been reduced beforehand).
Hi there. My understanding, from reading your question, is that you are 47 years old and lost your virginity this past December? If that is the case your bleeding on that occasion would have been normal. Other causes of bleeding, especially given your age, might be vaginal dryness or genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM). Other factors, not related to age, could by polyps, pelvic inflammatory disease, cervicitis, or vaginitis. Any guesses on this site are just speculation. I would urge you to follow up with an OB/GYN. They can give you a good answer and set your mind at ease. And if, on the off chance, that something is wrong, you will catch it early. I wish you all the best.