Tomorrow is the day

[Butterfly1503]

Unfortunately, I was cleaning out my drawers and I found 5 loratab 10's I had stashed:( so, I took them! I'm so angry with myself. I'm  going to be able to do this, right? I feel like a failure once again. I've stocked the fridge with juices and fruits. I told my kids that we can go get a game tomorrow for  the Xbox that we can all enjoy.. Something to keep me busy as I spend time with them. I just told them that I am starting to feel like I'm coming down with something. I am really scared, but I know if I start detox tomorrow that by this time next week I hopefully will be past the withdrawl, and  that will be the worst part. I know I have a long road ahead of me, but, I hope and pray next Friday.. I will be posting 7 days clean! That's my goal.

[jifmoc]

Hey, I commented on your meetings question but also wanted to chime in: 11 days ago started my dtox- a few days in,  I got 5 pills from a someone who didn't want the rest of his pills (brilliant right?) but I got up then I just kept going. I'm feeling okay physically. Getting there. But tolerable. Mentally, that's harder. That's why I'm always on this site! But, like everyone else said: just start again. That's what we do!!!

[VICourageous]

Hi I just wanted to chime in for support..I sure do like the name you have!!
The situation that happen to you I call it a Bee Sting! Every time we get stung by the addiction Bee we just pull the stinger out and we take another step forward and we are more aware that we do not like these Bee Stings..Heck how can we know what is right if we never experienced what is wrong..So please do not pack your bags and go on a quilt trip..Just tie the boot strings up and step forward once again! I was doing some spring cleaning in about my 8 month and I found a chip of Methadone along with some straws & a small mirror..Oh boy right away I just ran and destroyed it!! It did start to play that tape back in my brain  Ohh maybe just a little. for this reason or that..No No been using way to many years and that is all I need! Ha!
Yes as far as the meetings I go to NA/AA even if I have not had a drink in over 8 years and I know I sub one for another, this is my biggest fear is Booze..To easy to get! The Support anywhere even from family and friends is so important.You end of sharing a lot in meetings and also there is always at least one or two people that you listen to them share and it really touches your heart. Like wow I really needed to hear this today.And some meetings open up with the book "Just for Today" I am telling you it never fails..Just what I was thinking of for that day..It hits me in a good way every time.The 12 steps do not have to be rushed..These are Steps that you will do again and again as you grow further and further in time! So be that said! I do you wish you the best and keep on truckin forward and do not look back!!!
Bless

[ariley13]

I haven't been to a meeting yet. I'm on the road with my bf who is a truck driver and haven't been in one spot long enough to make it to one. I have heard a lot of positive things from other folks on here about them, though. Don't be scared. I think it will be a good thing for you. I can't wait to get to one. You'll have to let me know what it's like!

[On2better]

Lol that's supposed to say one thousand :-P

[On2better]

Yes, see my other post. I recommend it one hours and percent!

[Butterfly1503]

Thank you guys! ((Hugs)) I posted a question earlier. Have any of you ever went to meetings? I found a church that holds meetings in my town, and the first one is Sunday  night. I am so nervous, but I know I need to go, and talk, and get support!it is a twelve step program, and I think I can benefit from it. Has anyone else done this?

[On2better]

You're not a failure. You had a relapse and that's part of our disease. It's takes courage, honesty, and willingness to admit your mistake rather than hiding it in shame, guilt, embarrassment. Good for you, it's a step in the right direction, even though it doesn't feel like it. You are being honest with yourself.. Step one! We have all done things we aren't proud of. Anyways, you're in the right place, friend. Keep posting, keep posting!

[ariley13]

Don't beat yourself up over this. Try to take something positive away from it. What did you learn? What can you do to ensure you don't make the same mistake again? It sounds like you are ready to do this. Try to keep your head up. Keep posting on here. We want to be here for you. Good luck!

[angie1609]

Try not to be too hard on yourself. The positive is that you are getting yourself all set up to detox. Yes, you had a moment of weakness, but you realized it was a mistake and you didn't give up and try to go out and get more.

So congrats on making this decision to reclaim your life! You sound prepared. I think getting a game was a great idea. It gives your kids something to do while mommy is "sick", and it will also help to keep you distracted which will really help.

You can and will do this!! I am on day 3, and i promise you will not regret this decision!