Hi Everyone!
I am new to this forum, I just wanted to share my story, and also, hear what others have gone through.
I quit a (about 1 year) habit of oxycodone using sometimes 180-210 MG per day. It of course, started out with 7.5 MG's on an occasional, purely recreational basis (both me and my Husband). I guess I should say that I am also Bi-polar, and have Social Anxiety Disorder, Which I think is what drew me to the pills in the first place. They made me feel so good, better than I could have imagined! I could take on the world! Before I knew it I was having to take more and more to even get a buzz. And all the while, I was hiding it from my husband, cutting holes in my purse to hide them in, beg, borrow and steal. I would do whatever it took to get more pills, and I realized I couldn't even start my day without 45-60 MGs in me.
I'm still not quite sure what made me decide to fess up, I guess I felt like I had hit my 'rock bottom', I wasn't in as bad as a place as some people, but It seemed like my marriage, career and social life were all fading away quickly.
I was out of pills, but that wasn't a problem, I could easily get more. I needed to get my life back. It wasn't easy telling my family, especially my husband. There were tears, anger, blame, sorrow and so many other emotions coming from both of us, lucky for me, he is a wonderful man, and has been my rock and support through this.
About 11pm that night, the withdrawals started, I couldn't sleep, I was shaking, I was sweating and freezing, I couldn't eat or drink anything, and all I wanted to do, all I could think about, was getting more medication to make this all stop. Finally after 3 days of Hell, I decided to go to my Doctor because I knew I couldn't do it alone. He was very supportive and understanding, he didn't make me feel bad for getting addicted, he actually gave me a lot of comfort, telling me stories of other people he has helped, and encouraging me to want to do better. He gave me buspar (which I've heard mixed reviews about) to help with the anxiety, shakes and sweats. The Buspar seemed to help a little bit, he had me at 5mg twice a day, but I took WAY more than that. I used a 10 day RX in 3 days. But now, I'm not sure that it really helped, or if it satisfied my craving to just take a pill. He would have given me Valium, but I asked him not to because I knew I would just take it all, until it was gone.
Anyway, today is my 6th day off of Oxycodone, and I am really surprised at how good I feel! I'm still having trouble sleeping, I am restless, and seem to be getting my energy back little by little. I am not out of the woods yet, I still have a very strong craving for a pill, I can't seem to relax and stop thinking about it. I thought maybe some of you might be able to relate, or have suggestions, ideas, or just share your story.