7 days after major surgery.

[maria920]

Hello everyone!!!! Today is day 7 since ive had surgery and today i must say it is getting better ( pain wise) ive been in so much pain it had been unbearable but i just keep moving fwd. I was in the hospital for 4 days then came home. I developed a very high fever ( 104) and come to find out i have an infection inside. This has been a veryyyy LONGG week. While in the hospital they noticed my hemoglobin levels were dangerously low and this was due to internal bleeding. They ended up having to give me 4 pints of blood and said if my levels didnt go up another surgery was needed well thank the lord they went up a bit so i didnt have to have another one. I have a plan in place so this time next week if not sooner im going back on the suboxone to get off the dilaudid.  I have followed the instructions for taking the pills to a T. Im very proud of myself for being able to do this. I just wntd to update everyone on how i was doing ohhh ya BTW it WASN'T  cancer!!!!!!!!

[maria920]

Sorry if there are any typos typing fast and crying not a good combo.

[maria920]

Sorry if there are any typos typing fast and crying not a good combo.

[maria920]

I must say everything tht has been going on has made me real depressed. Besides for all the health stuff my husband still meeds to work bc we need the money. He has already taken 4 days from work unpaid and tht is going to b a HUGE hit for us. Before my surgery i had EVERYONE saying they were going to help with my kids and with my daughter the promise was kept bc she has a different father,  for my son i cant get ANYONE to watch him like everyone has promised. My mother was supposed to play a big part in helping with him but has given me a hard time from the start. I have a little brother who is 13 not little just younger and everything i mean everything revolves around him. Well tonight she was supposed to have my son at her house to sleep over well she tells me tht she is goi.g to watch him u.til he goes to bed the go home.... well he wakes up at least 3-4 times a night and i CAN NOT lift him or anything. Come to find out tje reason is my 13 yr old brother wntd to go ice skating and wants my mother to drop off and pick him up.. y? Who the h3ll knows... well once again im getting pushed aside and scr3w3d out of a sitter for him all night. I have never ever felt so low in my life bc of something my own mother did. Is this pay back bc of everything i did regarding the heroin? Or do noone care how i feel? I still have a fever and feel like death and my wonderful husband HAS to work or we will have not even a dime for Christmas.  I have been crying since 4pm and it is now 645pm and i must say its not helping like it normally does :(  how do i move past this and even look at her? She is here until he goes to bed and i cant even look at her let a lone speak to her. This is not the first time this has happened. Not as bad but similiar. Im thinking im done with everyone except my husband kids amd daughters fathers family bc they r a godsend and i kinda have to speakto them...  please help me out. Thanks guys sorry so long have to get it out.

[selfinduced]

Hello Maria, I think you are doing the best you can under the circumstances. Your also smart to get off your pain meds as soon as possible. Be mindful of the rebound effects and how our clever brains can turn one week of pill use into 6 months in the blink of an eye. Who is rxing the sub's now? As I said, you are very soon out of a major procedure. Go easy and stick close for support if you feel yourself slipping. Hope your feeling better by the minute. :))

[maria920]

Good morning self.. my surgeon knows im on subs but he honestly doesnt kno anything about them so it kinda stinks. The whole time i was in the hospital they were trying to get me to take them but i kept refusing bc i kno it blocks all pain killers. They actually had a pain mgmt dr come in and tell me if i take the subs it will NOT block the pain meds.. HA!! I kno better than tht. Right after my surgery i had absolutely no pain control what so ever bc they refused to give me anything other than morphine and thts like taking baby tylenol after doing H and being on subs for 3 months straight. Finally they switched me to dilaudid and it worked soo much better but tht was about 24 hrs after the surgery. I cried and cried which made the pain a million times worse bc the surgery was on my belly. I cant wait till mayb tomorrow or sunday and the pain goes down a bit so i can stop taking these pills and get back to my program.  :) ... Pat. Thank u!! I kno if he does make me go i will ill just b soo upset being back there and away from my husband and kids. I finally started eating last night which wasnt much but i forced the food down. I lost 8 pounds already and i cant afford to lose even one being tht at my bottom i was only 93 lbs. Yuck!!!  

[Pat1956100]

Oh Maria
If your doctor wants to admit you and you are in pain you really need to go.  I can only imagine your fear but you really need to get it checked.
Please listen and take good care of yourself.
I am hoping and praying for the best.
Hugs
Pat

[selfinduced]

G'morning Maria, Just want to offer my support and say your a real trooper in every sense of the word. Does your Surgeon know of the sub's your taking. I ask this in case you run into trouble and need a different balance? Fingers crossed your done with the hospital stays and on to mending with each day. 7 days is not long out on a major surgery so don't forget to take special care with yourself right now. Prayers and hugs are on their way.

[maria920]

Thank u guys!!! Bright i try to have a plan for everything tht had to do with pills or the subs i just dont want to ever get caught up again like tht! And pat they did but then when i came home thts when i developed the high fever tht i cant get rid of even with two really strong meds. My dr wants to admit me again but im sooo scared of the fact tht may mean another surgery and im still hurting pretty bad from this one. If it has to b done then i cant stop it but i definitely wont like it... thank u for the support all of u are amazing!!!!

[Pat1956100]

I bet you were terrified.  So glad everything turned out okay.
I hope they kept you in there long enough to heal.
Hugs
Pat

[Brightfutureahead]

Hi Maria...wow! So glad you're feeling better. Sounds like you have a plan in place which is always good :)

[maria920]

Thank u soo much pat!!! Its been such an emotional ride and ive cried alot! Being out of surgery for 36 hrs then hearing i have internal bleeding so i may have to go back in was really really hard for me! But thank god my praying paid off!!! Om feeling better every day so mayb by next week I'll b back to somewhat normal ( whatever  tht is) lol

[Pat1956100]

Hi Maria
Wow, you have been through a lot.
So glad you got good news after all that.
Good luck on the taper.  Hopefully that will be smooth for you.
You have been through enough.

[maria920]

Thank u vicki!!!! .i do need the subs being off tjr dilaudid for even 8 hours i start sweating and freezing its horrible..  i took subs for an H addiction
Ive only been on them about 3 months and i plan to taper in the coming months i dont want to go past 6 months on subs.im veryyy surprised i didnt have the urge to take more than prescribed.  :)

[vicki595]

I'm happy for you Maria!  That's great news!

I was wondering if you really need the Sub if you're going to taper off the DILAUDID. Do you take Sub for pain?

[maria920]

Oh one more thing i failed to mention the dilaudid i came home with is enough for 10 days and after tht im done and i also took half sub yesterday and it pretty much did the same thing as dilaudid so i may stop the pain killers tomorrow and go back to the subs... sooner the better right?