Hopeless

[mjean15]

So I was on here a cpl weeks ago bc I was upset my bf relapsed he came clean to me was upsetbw himself we fought about it and itnwas done.  I have known this man for a long time so I know when something is up and even after that I thought he was acting strange from time to time and yes I was kinda bitchy to him. We fought about that I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt but its just been a nightmare after tgat one time its happened more and he spentbway too much money its just horrible. We fight we lostbour savings which wasnt a lot  bc of paying off somethings recently but now were really ******. I am also a former addict but so its not like I dont getit I do but indont understand why he wouldncompromise his family. We have a beautiful baby girl together he has taken wonderful careb of us since infound out I was pregnant got us a bigger house so shebcould have her own room a better saferbcar was so ontop of saving money it was so amazingbto think of where we had been to where we got amd hes such a great hands on dad I feltblike I was finally happy and at peace. I know ppl arent perfect and he has said that he knows he ****** up he knowsbhe made things harder fornus  and that hes gonna fix it but it just makes me sadnto think that seeimg his family happy that all that weve done ismt enough like inlndont wantbto be around him and all of our plans to be married in a yr well I dont want to do this on and off for thr rest of my life and im not but not being together makes me feel so sad I want our daughter to have the best life possible and I dont know why he would ruin everything I feel stressednout butni dont run out amd get high its so messed up and I dont know how we or even I am going to get past this wout resenting him for putting his familynin a bad position hes supposed to make sure were ok at all times why did this suddenly all go to **** I just feel so lost and sad and hopeless....

[newlife52]

Hi.....I read your post from before.  Just a quick question....did your boyfriend relapse again?  Or are you still angry from a couple of weeks ago.

[dominosarah]

Why is he doing this?  He is an addict.  Until he can take care of himself he wont be able to care for his family.  It isnt his job to make you happy either whether he is using or not.  Have you thought about Alanon?  You need some help with this.