how do you know "for sure" if you are red-flagged

[wantmylifeback101]

Been reading all the posts for many months but just recently "joined". My question is, how do you know for sure if you have been flagged at emergency rooms, urgent cares, etc?? Just got home from an urgent care...dr thinks I have a "tear" in my knee. Extremely swollen and very painful. Can't fake that, but dr said he would NOT give me anything but Naprosen for the pain. Are you kidding me?! Says I have to follow up with my primary. I've had "5" foot surgeries. Gotten tons of pain medicines from that. (Feb was last one!) But something just wasn't right with this. And now I am scared to death that becuz of all the pain med's I've gotten in the last year or so, im in real trouble. Yes im addicted to pain meds. No question. Not hiding that...BUT can you get in real trouble from all that you've been on? What happens when your red-flagged and how long are you flagged for?  Except for a time or two, I've always gotten it from my podiatrist and my neurologist. And what happens when you REALLY have something happen (like a" tear") and you get nothing. It is really pretty scary when you don't know what "could" happen. I've ALWAYS had a fear that I would get in trouble with all these meds and I want to quit SO BAD but im just so scared. Scared of the withdrawals, scared I won't be able to do it. Scared I wont succeed. OMG.....I HATE these pills and the person that I've become.

[HappinessWithin]

You can do this. I used to be on Norco 10mg really bad. To were I was taking 10 pills just to get out of bed. I was killkng myself for two yrs. I am 28 yrs old now an have been sober for 3 in a half years now. I never thought I could make it through the withdrawals but with help of my mom an praying to God I got sober. But while I was taking the pills I was a monster. I lost everything I had including my husband an kids. Due to the fact I took money when I shouldnt have an spent it on pills. I was going through around 50 pills a day. I honestly dont know how I didnt die. I was numb to my feelings an didnt care about anyone but myself. It was a sad an horrible time in my life. So have faith you can come off these pills. Their is a support system out their for you to talk to an help you get through this. I will pray for you!

Happiness Within

[forgottensick]

Good for you kat. You just took the first step. Don`t under estamate your family. People aren`t perfect and it is possible that they too might be hiding something from you because of the "perfect family" thing. You are all family and nothing can change that. Family sticks together through thick and thin. You really can do this on your own, but don`t get freeked out if sombody find out. You are just human.  You sound a lot like my sister. She joined a small gym just so she had someplace to go and it helped her get in shape and get a lot of frustrations out at the same time. It also gives you an aliby when you want to go to NA or something. And then when you are better and everybody notices how much happier and healthy you are, you can say it was from going to the gym. Just a thought.
Dan

[wantmylifeback101]

Thanks...that's a deal iwilldothis!!!

[wantmylifeback101]

And "75" days......congratulations! You deserve every single day of that! I can't even imagine how hard.that was and is. And even thru the h*** you have gone through personally, you still find the time to "help" others and you're always one of first ones to do that. THANK YOU iwilldothis! I.hope you know just how special you are!!

[IwillDoThis]

prayers sent and PLEASE stick around!  I'm gonna be checkin in on you so no disappearing on me - okay?  Big hugs hon.  

[wantmylifeback101]

THANK YOU SOOOOOO MUCH IWILLDOTHIS! And equally thanks for being my VERY first friend. I really mean that. And everything you are saying is right and true. Thanks for being my friend. And you are right, I CAN do this. Im such a force to be reckoned with and am pretty strong-willed at every thing else in my life. GEEZ.....I quit smoking cigarettes after 35 years going cold turkey. So I just need to get all the stuff needed (im very familiar with the Thomas Recipe) and set a date and do it. Please pray that i can do this. I need all the prayers I can get. Thank you so much again for just being there for me.I wish I could express to you how much it means to me.

[IwillDoThis]

Kat - Everyone does this in their own way - just because people say "do this or do that" doesn't mean that is the be all, end all.  If you haven't stopped becasue you are not prepared to tell your family then you are selling yourself short.

You can quit by yourself, for yourself if that is what you need to do right now.  We say keeping secrets keep you sick and I do believe that is true - however if you feel its the only way to start then screw that - just do it.  People recommend telling your doctor because it helps keep you honest and block your easy route to drugs - it's called putting up roadblocks - but again don't put off stopping because you aren't ready to do that.

If you can get a plan together to begin a taper or stopping, throw in some N/A meetings you have a doable solution for now.  I wonder if you are really fooling your family?  So many times we think we are but they usually know something is up even if they don't know specifically what.

Kat - my concern for you being so isolated is that you are your own worst enemy here.  You have no external force to pull you out of this funk and self deprecating behavior and that isn't healthy.  I work from home so I am totally guilty of this myself - when I decided to stop I worked from bed every day, I wasn't taking care of my house or myself and I would go LONG periods of time without going anywhere until my boyfriend would just say "enough, lets get out".  Thank goodness I had him there to pull me out - I hear you saying you have no one to pull you out.

I know you are afraid  but don't over think this, don't over analyze this - if you want your life back you can have it but YOU have to really want it, pull your big girl panties up and make a plan.  We will all be here to support you, answer questions.

I so hoped you'd pop back up on here Kat - I know you want this.  Thinking about it is WAY more scary than just doing it.  Private message me any time Kat for support or just to talk.

You CAN do this!

[Elmijack15]

Meant prescribing narcotics, not practicing, stupid spell check ... :-) some people do this on their own and others go to doctors for help, you don't have to tell your family if you don't want to, this is about you! They'll probably see a big nice change in you!!

[Elmijack15]

Hey there hope you're feeling better, I don't think you've been flagged especially if you've had. Surgeries and have only gotten them from a couple of doctors. Alot of doctors with the new laws are scared of practicing narcotics which is why he probably said to go to your primary, he doesn't know you so he's probably trying to stay out of trouble. Good luck in whatever you decide to do but in all honesty, it does sound like you need to do something different, you aren't living and you only have one shot at it, don't waste your life alone, doing nothing, thats sad. There's so much to see and do, come on start your journey and start to discover that life is more than just existing. Hugs to you!!

[wantmylifeback101]

Thank you iwilldothis. I just wrote this long post and I guess I lost it somehow. But thanks for posting. I feel I know so many of you on this site. Just by reading all your threads. Im just SCARED Iwill. I truly am. I absolute HATE the person I've become. In fact I don't even know who I am anymore. And lately im really SICK of the amounts I take (like 12 perc a day) just to feel anything. Im completely depressed from these things. I don't work because of really bad migraines, so I sit around and do nothing. Just thinking about the pills. I don't take care of my house. Don't go anywhere and I mean" literally" don't go anywhere. Have NO friends and I just exist. And how sad is that! They're are people out there fighting for their lives out there with cancer ir whatever they might have and here I sit wasting my life away. And I WANT my life back. And I will be totally honest here...what im most AFRAID of is I know most all of you say that you can't do it by yourself AND that's the only way I want to do it. The thought of my kids or my sisters and brothers finding out about me being an addict, scares the living **** out of me. Im more than willing to go to NA and all that, but I don't want my "perfect" family to know my dark secret. And I think that's why I haven't even attempted to stop yet. Because I know w/out telling my shoe family and my docs and everyone, im setting myself up to fail...so why even try. But 75 days swill is SO amazing and im sure the hardest thing by far you have EVER done and you should be SO very proud of yourself. I only hope one day I can do that.

[IwillDoThis]

Kat - I've seen you here before, glad to see you back.  It is scary I know but if you want to stop, there is hope.   Min and the others covered why you would get flagged so I won't expand on that.  I just wanted to say hi and send you some support.  It might be the hardest thing you do getting off opiates, but it will be the most rewarding.

I was so sick of being sick all the time, watching the clock waiting to take that next pill, panicking if I left home and forgot them and I genuinely wanted to see where my pain levels were.  Opiates made my pain SO much worse.  I'm 75 days clean today and I feel better than I have in years.

When you are sick and tired of being sick and tired we will be here waiting to support you.  You CAN do this, you really can.

[littlebit667]

and thank you.  70 days is pretty cool! :)

[littlebit667]

Good question.  For me, I was tired of not recognizing me and who I was.  I got tired of counting pills and feeling guilty for milking my doctor of 35 years. She honestly thought she was helping me.  I had severe back pain for years and even when I no longer hurt..I kept taking them.  I have figured out that I was using to just not care anymore.  I wanted to care and enjoy life again.  You have to find your reason.  :)

[forgottensick]

Welcome. You have come to the right place. We all understand where you are coming from. Most of the time people get red flagged by going to the ER`s and asking for pain pills. If you haven`t been going to ER`s begging for pills and if you have only been doing what the doctors have been giving you, then most likely you have not been flagged. With all the abuse and greedy doctors giving pain pills to anybody with the money, the ATF has come down hard on ER doctors and even regular doctors about giving scripts for pain drugs. I just spent the past 3 months learning just how bad things have gotten. I have been on methadone for cronic pain for the past 7 years and because of all the problems I have with just getting the pain meds I need to live a quality life, I`m am being forced to taper off my pain meds and try to find other ways to deal with my cronic pain issues. The withdrawls you hear about are suck, but not as bad as you think. If you take the suppliments suggested on this site and listen to what others have done to make the withdrawls easier, you will be fine.  We all have our reasons for getting off the pills. When you decide you have had enough and want to get off them, let us know. We are here to help you all the way.
  Dan

[wantmylifeback101]

That is AWESOME on being 70 days clean. I can't even imagine how amazing and proud you must be. You deserve to be. Keep up the good work. Can I ask you one thing...what made you FINALLY say its enough and im over it and im going to claim my life back?

[littlebit667]

Yep, dependent or addicted it *****.  I am over 70 days clean and it was the hardest, best thing I ever did.

I do not know about being flagged.  It is possible.  I do know that docs are being VERY careful these days due to all of the articles about pain pills and overdosing, etc.  It does make it hard for those with real pain to get the help they need.  A balance needs to be seen.  There is some proof that over taking pain pills actually causes pain and it becomes a real issue.  A lot of people want to get off..to see where their pain levels are to determine if they NEED them or if they can find other options to manage their pain.  


If you read more of the posts you will see what I mean.  The fear of withdrawals are often worse than the actual thing.  Yes, it *****..it is not fun and it is not easy...it is doable and coming here is one support that makes it easier.  

If you want to stop we will help you.  I hope you are.  It is a pretty good world when you are not fuzzy headed.  I am learning that each day I stay  clean.

[Pkkw098]

i fell off a 100fe cliff in 1987, 28 yrs old been on pain killers{oxys} and zanex for 30 yrs, out of zanex , cant, reach dr, can I take 0.1 clonidine at night to help sleep